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My Reason for reasoning.

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My start with lung cancer. Archives | Subscribe to Alerts Alerts Subscribe to Alerts | Feeds
 
Friday, November 9, 2007
7:22:57 PM CST
Feeling Frustrated

Little Trouble This Week

Hi J-Land. hope all are doing good. I had some problems , this week. I developed pnuemonia and had a liter of fluid in my lung that had to be drawn off. I also had two units of plasma. I was in the hospital, three days. So glad to be home!! Had my third chemo treatment, yesterday, now I'll be on rest for three weeks and then have a cat scan to see if there's any improvement to the tumors, then start back on chemo. Weather here in Nashville, TN is beautiful and the trees are all aglow!! I love this time of year!! So , you all stay safe and God be with, each of you. I have a couple of things to share, I hope you enjoy. Till next time, Hugs to all, Barbara

                                                

Attitude

There once was a woman who woke up one morning,
Looked in the mirror,
And noticed she had only three hairs on her head.

Well," she said, "I think I'll braid my hair today?"
So she did
And
She
Had
A
Wonderful
Day.



The next day she woke up,
Looked in the mirror
And saw that she had only two hairs on her head.

"H-M-M," she said,
"I think I'll part my hair down the middle today?"
So she did
And
She
Had
A
Grand
Day.




The next day she woke up,
Looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head.

"Well," she said,
"today I'm going to wear my hair in a pony tail."
So she did
And
She
Had
A
Fun,
Fun
Day.




The next day she woke up,
Looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn't a single hair on her head.

"YEA!" she exclaimed,
"I don't have to fix my hair today!"




Attitude is everything.
 
 
Be kinder than necessary,
For everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

Live simply,


Love generously,

Care deeply,

Speak kindly.......

Leave the rest to God
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...
 
It's about learning to dance in the rain
 
 
 
Is God Dancing On Your Potato Chips?

Not too long ago I had "one of those days." I was feeling pressure from a writing deadline. I had company arriving in a couple days and the toilet was clogged. I went to the bank, and the trainee teller processing my deposit had to start over three times. I swung by the supermarket to pick up a few things and the lines were serpentine.
 
By the time I got home, I was frazzled and sweaty and in a hurry to get something on the table for dinner. Deciding on Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup, I grabbed a can opener, cranked open the can, then remembered I had forgotten to buy milk at the store. Nix the soup idea. Setting the can aside, I went to plan "B", which was leftover baked beans. I grabbed the Tupperware container from the fridge, popped the seal, took a look and groaned. My husband isn't a picky eater, but even HE won't eat baked beans that look like caterpillars.
 
Really frustrated now, I decided on a menu that promised to be as foolproof as it is nutrition-free: hot dogs and potato chips. Retrieving a brand new bag of chips from the cupboard, I grabbed the cellophane and gave a hearty pull. The bag didn't open. I tried again. Nothing happened. I took a breath, doubled my muscle, and gave the bag a hearty wrestle. With a loud pop, the cellophane suddenly gave way, ripping wide from top to bottom. Chips flew sky high. I was left holding the bag, and it was empty.
 
It was the final straw. I let out a blood curdling scream. "I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" My husband heard my unorthodox cry for help. Within minutes he was standing at the doorway to the kitchen, where he surveyed the damage: an opened can of soup, melting groceries, moldy baked beans, and one quivering wife standing ankle deep in potato chips. My husband did the most helpful thing he could think of at the moment. He took a flying leap, landing flat-footed in the pile of chips. And then he began to stomp and dance and twirl, grinding those chips into my linoleum in the process!
 
I stared. I fumed. Pretty soon I was working to stifle a smile. Eventually I had to laugh. And finally I decided to join him. I, too, took a leap onto the chips. And then I danced. Now I'll be the first to admit that my husband's response wasn't the one I was looking for. But the truth is, it was exactly what I needed. I didn't need a cleanup crew as much as I needed an attitude adjustment, and the laughter from that rather funky moment provided just that.
 
So now I have a question for you, and it's simply this:  Has God ever stomped on your chips? I know that, in my life, there have been plenty of times when I've gotten myself into frustrating situations and I've cried out for help, all the while hoping God would show up with a celestial broom and clean up the mess.
 
What often happens instead is that God dances on my chips, answering my prayer in a completely different manner than I had expected, but in the manner that is best for me after all. Sometimes I can see right away that God's response was the best one after all. Sometimes I have to wait weeksor months before I begin to understand how and why God answered a particular prayer the way he did. There are even some situations that, years later, I'm still trying to understand. I figure God will fill me in sooner or later, either this side of Heaven or beyond.
 
Do I trust Him? Even when He's answering my prayers in a way that is completely different from my expectations? Even when He's dancing and stomping instead of sweeping and mopping? Can I embrace what He's offering? Can I let His joy adjust my attitude? Am I going to stand on the sidelines and sulk, or am I willing to learn the steps of the dance He's dancin' with my needs in mind? I'll be honest with you: Sometimes I sulk. Sometimes I dance. I'm working on doing more of the latter than the former. I guess the older I get the more I realize that He really does know what He's doing. He loves me and I can trust Him. Even when the chips are down.
 
Author Unknown
 
 
 

"All races and tribes in the world are like different colored flowers of one meadow.All are beautiful"

 

                                                          

                                                      



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Tuesday, October 30, 2007
7:40:41 PM CDT
Feeling Happy

ONE DAY AT A TIME

Hi J'Land. I had my second treatment today and still no side effects. This seemed to make the doctors happy.  I do feel like, I'm feeling better, a little more energy. I'm going to make it, one day at a time. God bless all for the prayers, I feel them working. I have a few things to share with you, hope you enjoy them or know someone they can help. God bless and take care, till we talk again. Hugs,Barbara

                                                  

Ray Of Sunshine <<< click here
So beautiful!!!
 
 
 

THE FOUR BLESSED LOOKS


Look back and Thank God.
   Look forward and Trust God.
  Look around and Serve God.
Look within and Find God!"

"I asked God, 'How do I get the best out of life?'   God said, 'Face your past without regrets.  Handle your present with confidence.  Prepare for the future without fear!'"

"Without God, our week is: Mournday, Tearsday, Wasteday, Thirstday, Fightday, Shatterday and Sinday.  So, allow Him to be with you every day!"

"Life is short, so forgive quickly.  Believe slowly.  Love truly.  Laugh un controllably.  Never regret anything that makes you happy.  And have a wonderful journey!!

 

 

 

             The Holy Alphabet... 

             

              Although things are not perfect
              Because of trial or pain
              Continue in thanksgiving
              Do not begin to blame
              Even when the times are hard
              Fierce winds are bound to blow
              God is forever able
              Hold on to what you know
              Imagine life without His love
              Joy would cease to be
              Keep thanking Him for all the things
              Love imparts to thee
              Move out of 'Camp Complaining'
              No weapon that is known
              On earth can yield the power
              Praise can do alone
              Quit looking at the future
              Redeem the time at hand
              Start every day with worship
              To 'thank' is a command
              Until we see Him coming
              Victorious in the sky
              We'll run the race with gratitude
              Xalting God most high
              Yes, there'll be good times and yes some                  will be bad, but...
              Zion waits in glory...where none are ever sad!
 
 
 
 


 

              '  I AM Too blessed to be stressed!' The shortest distance 
between a problem and a solution is the distance between your knees and 
the floor.
              The one who kneels to the Lord can stand up to anything. 
Love and peace be   with you forever, Amen.
 
 
 
from my great friend, Sonata, who also suffers from her third bout of cancer.


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Thursday, October 25, 2007
7:27:42 PM CDT
Feeling Quiet

Hi J'Land!! Just a short note to let you know, I'm not having any side effects to my chemo . This makes me very happy, I'd  hate to deal with those too. Another session this coming Tues. Moving right along!! LOL. Hope you all have a safe weekend. God bless, Hugs,Barbara



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Tuesday, October 23, 2007
6:36:12 PM CDT
Feeling Hopeful

ANOTHER START

Hi J'Land, how's everyone? Well, I started my new round of chemo, today. Wasn't so bad, just took so long and I'm very tired. I was told today, that I have another tumor, besides the one in my lung. This one is close to my esophagus and is about an inch big. A surprise for sure but I may as well have it now, than later. That way, maybe they can get them both with this set of treatments. LOL, can't give up hope!! The Lord has laid His hand on me and I'm ready to take each day as it comes. I realized some days will be worse than others but with God's help, I will make it!!!!! I just wanted to let you know about my first session, I'm tired and need some rest. So stay safe and may God bless. Hugs to all, Barb

 

                                             



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Monday, October 22, 2007
9:35:30 PM CDT
Feeling Quiet

TOMORROW

Hi J'Land. Well, tomorrow my battle starts again and I want to tell you, I'm ready!! I'll add to my journal, tomorrow night and tell you how it goes.  God bless and good night. Barb

 

                                                                   



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Sunday, October 21, 2007
7:26:48 PM CDT
Feeling Anxious

Ok, let's fight!!

Ok, J Land, I'm back tonight and I have quit, rattling my cage!! I lost my reason  for reasoning,last night but I think I have found it again. So, I'm ready for a good hard fight, with this cancer. It seemed like The Lord told me, Hey, Barb!! After, I've given you the strength to overcome, losing both parents and your only sibling plus getting you through the first battle, now, you are doubting Me? I feel so ashamed. How could I doubt? I'm so blessed with so many things, my children and grandchildren, a roof over my head, food, clothing and such great friends. I am able to get up, every morning, I can walk, smell, see and hear, how often I take these things for granted!! My Precious Lord, forgive me. Ok, now to fight my fight. Tomorrow I go for a PT, actually a blood test and I start back on chemo, Tues. Chemo,  once a week , every  3 weeks then off 3 weeks. I'll do my best to keep my journal, updated, as often as I can. Many thanks for all the positive love and prayers, that have been sent my way. You are all angels, to me. So, until our keyboards, touch, once again, may God bless and keep you safe, Hugs,Barbara

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Saturday, October 20, 2007
7:57:14 PM CDT
Feeling Worried

Good evening J-Land. Hope all are doing well, today. I just sat here and look at a blank screen. I feel completely lost. My mind is swirling with all kinds of thoughts. I can't focus on any one thing. I do know God is with me but the same question keeps running through my mind---am I going to die? I can't leave my kids yet. Even though they're all grown, they need me so much and I know the pain, they'll feel, if I do die. I still feel the pain of my parents death. Am I scared?  You betcha I am. I think if I started screaming, I'd never stop. I want to run away but I have no where to go. I need something so bad and have no idea what it is. I 've been divorced , 7 years and I need my husbands' arms to hold me and tell me that everything is gonna be alright but that just can't be. I am crying. I am sure I sound like a raving maniac but indeed, I feel like one tonight. I'm so afraid, I'm losing it!! Forgive me for my honesty but I need to vent, tonight. Please God, give me strength!! My faith is strong but I am so weak. Good night, J'Land and God bless, Barbara

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Friday, October 19, 2007
8:38:36 PM CDT
Feeling Hopeful

Hi all at J-Land. I'd like to take this time to thank my special friend, Deb and all her friends that have heard about my cancer being relapsed and have left such kind words. It's still hard for me to believe, that the cancer is back and bigger than it was to start with. Just 4 months ago, it was an inch, now three inches. I was so in hopes, that what they saw was a scar but that wasn't meant to be. Ok, the fight shall continue!! I will not give up. Besides, LOL, I'm already experienced in fighting!! I start my chemo, again, Oct. 23. This could be a lengthy session, I go 3 weeks, once a week, for chemo and then off 3 weeks. This could last, up to 9 months. Evey six weeks, they will do a new cat scan and see if I'm responding. I still know that God has a reason and has brought me this far and I'll continue to leave it in His hands. God be with each of you and keep you safe. Hugs,Barbara

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Wednesday, July 11, 2007
9:30:30 PM CDT

THE VERDICT IS IN

MY DEAR J-LAND FRIENDS,
LETTING YOU KNOW, MY CANCER IS IN REMISSION . I  HAD TWO MASSES, ONE IS COMPLETELY GONE AND THE OTHER HAS GONE FROM THE SIZE OF A LEMON TO THE SIZE OF A  CHERRY TOMATO. IT IS EITHER SCAR TISSUE OR SOME OF THE MASS LEFT. THEY WILL DO ANOTHER C-SCAN IN ABOUT 3 OR 4 MONTHS. SO, I REALLY FEEL IT'S  JUST SCAR TISSUE, AFTER 34 TREATMENTS OF RADIATION. THANKS FOR ALL YOUR PRAYERS.  GOD IS GOOD!!!!!LOVE, BARBARA


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Tuesday, July 10, 2007
12:41:21 AM CDT
Feeling Anxious

GETTING CLOSE

Hi J-Land, friends!! Hope all are doing good. Well, this Wednesday, I'll find out the verdict. I had my last cat scan done yesterday. I'm asking each of you for a powerful prayer!! I've come, this far and it's so wonderful, that the end is in sight. I feel that all the prayers have been anwsered and that I'll come out of this, with a clean slate. I can never thank each of you enough, for the prayers. I'm still tired but my body feels good. For anyone that has cancer or know someone that does, please tell my story and tell them,   they can make it!! I'll let each of you know, Wednesday , how this has turned out, so till then, keep smiling and know that God is with you. God bless, Hugs,Barbara

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