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April 2006
Thursday, April 27, 2006
11:22:00 AM EDT
IM A VERY FIRM BELIEVER NEVER TO USE THE QUOTE "IT COULDNT GET ANY WORSE" CAUSE I KNOW THAT NO MATTER WHAT I MISERY I AM GOING THROUGH AT THE TIME BECAUSE I AM DEFINATELY SMART ENOUGH TO KNOW THINGS COULD GET WORSE!!!! MUCH MUCH WORSE SO I HAVE ALWAYS WORKED ON TRYING NEVER TO SAY THAT CAUSE I AM THE PERSON THAT WOULD SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT AND I WOULD BE SHOWN THESE CAN GET WORSE BUT TODAY IS ONE OF THOSE DAYS THAT I HAVE TO BITE MY TONUGE SO I DONT SAY IT CAUSE I AM SOOOO DISGUSTED WITH MY LIFE RIGHT NOW WHICH ONLY BRINGS ON MORE AND MORE DEPRESSION. I AM SOOOO FINIANCIALLY BURDENED AS IT IS AND WE CAN NEVER NEVER SEEM TO GET ONE CRISIS CAUGHT UP OR MADE DISAPPEARED BEFORE ANOTHER ONE COMES UP. AND I DO PRAY AND PRAY AND PRAY EVERYDAY FOR THIS BURDEN TO LEAVE BUT IT JUST STICKS WITH ME. I WATCHED THIS CHRISTIAN CHANNEL ONCE AND THEY SAID NEVER GIVE UP ON HOPE BECAUSE THE MINUTE YOU DO SOMETHING STUPID WHICH THEY DIDNT USE THE WORD STUPID I AM SURE BUT I CANT REMEMBER WHAT THEY USED SOMETHING WOULD HAVE COME UP TO THE GOOD. IF YOU WOULD HAVE ONLY WAITED ONE MORE MINUTE OR ONE MORE DAY OR ONE MORE WEEK AND SO ON YOUR PRAYERS WOULD HAVE BEEN ANSWERED AND IVE ALWAYS TRIED TO HOLD ONTO THAT BUT I TELL YOU I GO THROUGH SOOOO MUCH TORMENT IN THE TIME BEING.........I HEARD THIS KNOCKING SOUND IN MY CAR THE EVENING BEFORE YESTERDAY AND I THOUGHT O NO NOT ANOTHER PROBLEM!!!! I KEPT TELLING MYSELF JUST MAYBE IT COULD BE NOTHING AND IT WILL GO AWAY. I PRAYED FOR IT TO GO AWAY TOO. TOOK IT OUT FOR A TEST DRIVE YESTERDAY AND IT DIDNT GO AWAY SO I MADE MY HUSBAND TAKE IT TO TUFFY CAUSE I FELT IT COULD BE A BRAKE PROBLEM. STILL HAD HOPE THAT IT COULD BE TAKEN CARE OF AND NOT COST THAT MUCH. O HOW WRONG I WAS CAUSE IT IS GOING TO COST OVER $500!!!! SOOOO IN DEBT I GO AGAIN AND WHEN I GOT HOME I TOLD MY HUSBAND JUST GO AHEAD AND GET THAT LAWN MOWER THAT YOU HAVE BEEN LOOKING AT IN THE SALES PAPER CAUSE THAT IS GOING TO CREATE A WHOLE NEW PROBLEM IF WE DONT GET ONE CAUSE OF COURSE OURS BROKE DOWN AND WE LIVE IN A MOBILE HOME PARK AND THEY ARE BIG TIME ONTO YOU IF YOU DONT MOW YOUR YARD AND OUR NEIGHBOR HAS BEEN DOING IT BUT I CANT ALLOW HIM TO DO IT ALL SUMMER CAUSE IT WOULD BOTHER ME TOO MUCH CAUSE I COULD NOT PAY HIM A PENNY FOR HIS EFFORT. SO SINCE WE ARE GOING INTO SUCH DEBT WITH MY CAR WE MIGHT AS WELL GET A LAWN MOWER BEFORE WE END UP GETTING A NOTICE SAYING THEY ARE GOING TO MOW THEMSELVES AND THEY CHARGE A ARM AND LEG FOR DOING THIS. I TOLD MY HUSBAND MAYBE WE COULD COME UP WITH SOME MOWING JOBS FOR HIM TO MAYBE PAY FOR IT BUT I AINT HOLDING MY BREATH BECAUSE THERE AINT BEEN MUCH RELIEF COME OUR WAY IN THE PAST. AND PLUS I AM JUST NOT TOO SURE IF MY HUSBAND'S HEALTH IS REALLY GOOD ENOUGH TO TAKE ON ANYMORE THAN WHAT HE IS DOING NOW WHICH IS HIS JOB. SOOOO I JUST DONT KNOW. I HAVE FOR QUITE A LONG TIME BEEN OUT SEARCHING FOR ME A JOB BUT I AM SOOOO DARN LIMITED WHEN IT COMES TO HOURS SO WHEN I GO TO PUT A APPLICATION IN NOBODY YET IS INTERESTED IN ME PLUS I HAVE NEXT TO NOTHING AS FAR AS EXPERIENCE IN ANYTHING. MY YOUNGEST DAUGHTER HELPS OUT A WHOLE LOT BUT SHE JUST GOT A NEW CAR WHICH SHE HIGHLY DESERVES SO SHE WILL BE LIMITED NOW WITH WHAT SHE CAN HELP WITH SOOOO IT IS VERY IMPORTANT THAT I FIND SOMETHING SOON. I AM LIMITED CAUSE I BABYSIT MY GRANDAUGHTER AFTER SCHOOL AND I BABYSIT TWO BOYS SO I NEED SOMETHING WHERE I CAN START AROUND 5PM. THESE DAYS PLACES WANT YOU TO BE VERY FLEXIABLE AS FAR AS HOURS WHICH I REALLY CANT. I SELL AVON BUT MAKE NEXT TO NO PROFIT BECAUSE IT SURE HASNT COME OFF THE GROUND AND IVE DONE IT FOR QUITE A FEW YEARS. I PUT MY NAME IN THE PARK OFFICE TO BE A POOL MONITER AND THAT WOULD BE IDEAL FOR ME. THEIR ONE SHIFT STARTS AT FIVE BUT HAVE NEVER BEEN CALLED BUT SUPPOSELY I AM STILL ON THEIR LIST. DONT PAY ALL THAT GREAT BUT HEY SOMETHING IS ALWAYS BETTER THAN NOHTHING. SOOOO WHAT I AM SAYING I AM ALL THE MORE ANNOYED AND ANGRY WITH LIFE RIGHT NOW AND REALLY FEEL STRONG DOUBT IF ANYTHING EVER GOING TO GET BETTER. I KNOW THAT I AM NOT ALONE WITH THESE KINDS OF PROBLEMS. I READ JOURNALS AFTER JOURNALS ABOUT OTHERS GOING THROUGH THE SAME MISERY. I HEAR IT PERSONALLY ALMOST EVERYDAY HOW PEOPLE ARE ALSO STRUGGLING. AND MY HEART DEFINATELY GOES OUT TO THEM CAUSE I SOOOO KNOW WHAT THEY ARE FEELING. I FEEL LIKE I AM A EXPERT AT KNOWING. HAHA. SOOOOO AS ALWAYS I TRY TO CARRY ON JUST ONE MORE DAY CAUSE YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN YOUR SHIP IS GOING TO COME IN. YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN IT IS YOUR TURN FOR GOOD THINGS TO START HAPPENING. I AM GOING TO TRY TO GET MYSELF BUSY AND JUST NOT THINK TOO MUCH ABOUT IT ALL.
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11:22:00 AM EDT
IM A VERY FIRM BELIEVER NEVER TO USE THE QUOTE "IT COULDNT GET ANY WORSE" CAUSE I KNOW THAT NO MATTER WHAT I MISERY I AM GOING THROUGH AT THE TIME BECAUSE I AM DEFINATELY SMART ENOUGH TO KNOW THINGS COULD GET WORSE!!!! MUCH MUCH WORSE SO I HAVE ALWAYS WORKED ON TRYING NEVER TO SAY THAT CAUSE I AM THE PERSON THAT WOULD SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT AND I WOULD BE SHOWN THESE CAN GET WORSE BUT TODAY IS ONE OF THOSE DAYS THAT I HAVE TO BITE MY TONUGE SO I DONT SAY IT CAUSE I AM SOOOO DISGUSTED WITH MY LIFE RIGHT NOW WHICH ONLY BRINGS ON MORE AND MORE DEPRESSION. I AM SOOOO FINIANCIALLY BURDENED AS IT IS AND WE CAN NEVER NEVER SEEM TO GET ONE CRISIS CAUGHT UP OR MADE DISAPPEARED BEFORE ANOTHER ONE COMES UP. AND I DO PRAY AND PRAY AND PRAY EVERYDAY FOR THIS BURDEN TO LEAVE BUT IT JUST STICKS WITH ME. I WATCHED THIS CHRISTIAN CHANNEL ONCE AND THEY SAID NEVER GIVE UP ON HOPE BECAUSE THE MINUTE YOU DO SOMETHING STUPID WHICH THEY DIDNT USE THE WORD STUPID I AM SURE BUT I CANT REMEMBER WHAT THEY USED SOMETHING WOULD HAVE COME UP TO THE GOOD. IF YOU WOULD HAVE ONLY WAITED ONE MORE MINUTE OR ONE MORE DAY OR ONE MORE WEEK AND SO ON YOUR PRAYERS WOULD HAVE BEEN ANSWERED AND IVE ALWAYS TRIED TO HOLD ONTO THAT BUT I TELL YOU I GO THROUGH SOOOO MUCH TORMENT IN THE TIME BEING.........I HEARD THIS KNOCKING SOUND IN MY CAR THE EVENING BEFORE YESTERDAY AND I THOUGHT O NO NOT ANOTHER PROBLEM!!!! I KEPT TELLING MYSELF JUST MAYBE IT COULD BE NOTHING AND IT WILL GO AWAY. I PRAYED FOR IT TO GO AWAY TOO. TOOK IT OUT FOR A TEST DRIVE YESTERDAY AND IT DIDNT GO AWAY SO I MADE MY HUSBAND TAKE IT TO TUFFY CAUSE I FELT IT COULD BE A BRAKE PROBLEM. STILL HAD HOPE THAT IT COULD BE TAKEN CARE OF AND NOT COST THAT MUCH. O HOW WRONG I WAS CAUSE IT IS GOING TO COST OVER $500!!!! SOOOO IN DEBT I GO AGAIN AND WHEN I GOT HOME I TOLD MY HUSBAND JUST GO AHEAD AND GET THAT LAWN MOWER THAT YOU HAVE BEEN LOOKING AT IN THE SALES PAPER CAUSE THAT IS GOING TO CREATE A WHOLE NEW PROBLEM IF WE DONT GET ONE CAUSE OF COURSE OURS BROKE DOWN AND WE LIVE IN A MOBILE HOME PARK AND THEY ARE BIG TIME ONTO YOU IF YOU DONT MOW YOUR YARD AND OUR NEIGHBOR HAS BEEN DOING IT BUT I CANT ALLOW HIM TO DO IT ALL SUMMER CAUSE IT WOULD BOTHER ME TOO MUCH CAUSE I COULD NOT PAY HIM A PENNY FOR HIS EFFORT. SO SINCE WE ARE GOING INTO SUCH DEBT WITH MY CAR WE MIGHT AS WELL GET A LAWN MOWER BEFORE WE END UP GETTING A NOTICE SAYING THEY ARE GOING TO MOW THEMSELVES AND THEY CHARGE A ARM AND LEG FOR DOING THIS. I TOLD MY HUSBAND MAYBE WE COULD COME UP WITH SOME MOWING JOBS FOR HIM TO MAYBE PAY FOR IT BUT I AINT HOLDING MY BREATH BECAUSE THERE AINT BEEN MUCH RELIEF COME OUR WAY IN THE PAST. AND PLUS I AM JUST NOT TOO SURE IF MY HUSBAND'S HEALTH IS REALLY GOOD ENOUGH TO TAKE ON ANYMORE THAN WHAT HE IS DOING NOW WHICH IS HIS JOB. SOOOO I JUST DONT KNOW. I HAVE FOR QUITE A LONG TIME BEEN OUT SEARCHING FOR ME A JOB BUT I AM SOOOO DARN LIMITED WHEN IT COMES TO HOURS SO WHEN I GO TO PUT A APPLICATION IN NOBODY YET IS INTERESTED IN ME PLUS I HAVE NEXT TO NOTHING AS FAR AS EXPERIENCE IN ANYTHING. MY YOUNGEST DAUGHTER HELPS OUT A WHOLE LOT BUT SHE JUST GOT A NEW CAR WHICH SHE HIGHLY DESERVES SO SHE WILL BE LIMITED NOW WITH WHAT SHE CAN HELP WITH SOOOO IT IS VERY IMPORTANT THAT I FIND SOMETHING SOON. I AM LIMITED CAUSE I BABYSIT MY GRANDAUGHTER AFTER SCHOOL AND I BABYSIT TWO BOYS SO I NEED SOMETHING WHERE I CAN START AROUND 5PM. THESE DAYS PLACES WANT YOU TO BE VERY FLEXIABLE AS FAR AS HOURS WHICH I REALLY CANT. I SELL AVON BUT MAKE NEXT TO NO PROFIT BECAUSE IT SURE HASNT COME OFF THE GROUND AND IVE DONE IT FOR QUITE A FEW YEARS. I PUT MY NAME IN THE PARK OFFICE TO BE A POOL MONITER AND THAT WOULD BE IDEAL FOR ME. THEIR ONE SHIFT STARTS AT FIVE BUT HAVE NEVER BEEN CALLED BUT SUPPOSELY I AM STILL ON THEIR LIST. DONT PAY ALL THAT GREAT BUT HEY SOMETHING IS ALWAYS BETTER THAN NOHTHING. SOOOO WHAT I AM SAYING I AM ALL THE MORE ANNOYED AND ANGRY WITH LIFE RIGHT NOW AND REALLY FEEL STRONG DOUBT IF ANYTHING EVER GOING TO GET BETTER. I KNOW THAT I AM NOT ALONE WITH THESE KINDS OF PROBLEMS. I READ JOURNALS AFTER JOURNALS ABOUT OTHERS GOING THROUGH THE SAME MISERY. I HEAR IT PERSONALLY ALMOST EVERYDAY HOW PEOPLE ARE ALSO STRUGGLING. AND MY HEART DEFINATELY GOES OUT TO THEM CAUSE I SOOOO KNOW WHAT THEY ARE FEELING. I FEEL LIKE I AM A EXPERT AT KNOWING. HAHA. SOOOOO AS ALWAYS I TRY TO CARRY ON JUST ONE MORE DAY CAUSE YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN YOUR SHIP IS GOING TO COME IN. YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN IT IS YOUR TURN FOR GOOD THINGS TO START HAPPENING. I AM GOING TO TRY TO GET MYSELF BUSY AND JUST NOT THINK TOO MUCH ABOUT IT ALL.
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This entry has 12 comments: (Add your own)
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I think I know how you've been feeling. Years ago, after I'd been laid off from my job and couldn't find another I too felt like it just couldn't get any worse. I was afraid I'd lose my house to foreclosure. I didn't work for over a year and my son had just finished college but couldn't find a job, he was still waiting tables. I live alone, he'd been on his own for several years, so you know, I was really ALONE. I have no family to help me through any bad times, no husband, not even friends I could turn to. One day I cried out to God, "Lord, you blessed me with everything I have but if I lose it I know I still have You". From then on the burden was lifted, I started doing the things I had to do to rise up from this very dark time in my life. I took a very low paying, temporary job, but it got me out. I did the very best I could do to get noticed by the people I worked with so they'd think of me whenever they heard of something I would be interested in. I finally did get a full time job. Since then I have never forgotten that God lifted me up and out of the feeling of hopelessness I was in. I'm praying for you and your family. Please remember that you cannot lose hope, things will get better.
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Well, yes it can... But we have to ask the question, "how much worse?",because I've seen things I wish I never had. But I've also seen things that have made me believe in GOD and for that I feel extremly blessed. I wish with all my heart I could say something that would change everything for the better but life just won't work like that. My life at the moment sucks but I still think LIFE is the best game in town. From one human-being to another I love you. Jamill...
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TODAY I READ YOUR BLOG.FIRST ONE I HAVE EVER READYOUR STORY IS SO FAMILIAR TO ME.I ,M 60 YR OLD AND BEEN MARRIED 42 YRS I HAVE 2 CHILDREN AND 5 GRANDCHILDREN.WE ARE STARTING OVER AT 60 YR OLD.GOD PROVIDED US ENOUGH TO START OVER IN A DOUBLE WIDE MOBIL HOME.WHICH IS IN THE CITY.HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN SELF EMPLOYED FIRST FARMING.WE HAD STOP TO INVITE THESE PEOPLE TO CHIRCH.HE HAD 40 ACRES OF LAND.FARM WAS HIS FIRST DREAM.SO HE RENTED THEIR 40 ACRES.I TOO KNOW GOD IS AN AWSOME GOD.
TO MAKE A LONG STORY SHORT HE DECIDED TO GO INTO CATFISH FARMING AND THAT WAS NOT A GOOD IDEA FRO US.WE LOST ALL WE HAD WORKED FOR 42 YRS AND IT WAS ALL GONE .DEPRESSION WAS NOT EVEN CLOSE TO WHAT HE WENT INTO.HE CRIES WOULD NOT GO ANYWHERE WAS JUST IN A TOATL ANOTHER WORLD.
WITH GOD AS OUR CO -PILOT WE WILL SURVIVE.BOTH OF US ARE DISABLED ON A FIXED INCOME.WE RECENTLY DECIDED TO GIVE GOD HIS 10%.IS HARD TO DO THAT BUT WE ARE DEPENDING ON GOD.PHIL 4 13 SAYS I CAN DO ALL THINGS THRU CHRIST WHO STRENTHENS ME.MU FAVORITE SCRIPTURE IN BIBLE.
MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY
IN A WAY ONLY HE CAN DOJUST TRUST HIM TO DO WHAT HE PROMISED TRUST HIM .PRAISE HIM FOR ALL THINGS.
ANN -
TODAY I READ YOUR BLOG.FIRST ONE I HAVE EVER READYOUR STORY IS SO FAMILIAR TO ME.I ,M 60 YR OLD AND BEEN MARRIED 42 YRS I HAVE 2 CHILDREN AND 5 GRANDCHILDREN.WE ARE STARTING OVER AT 60 YR OLD.GOD PROVIDED US ENOUGH TO START OVER IN A DOUBLE WIDE MOBIL HOME.WHICH IS IN THE CITY.HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN SELF EMPLOYED FIRST FARMING.WE HAD STOP TO INVITE THESE PEOPLE TO CHIRCH.HE HAD 40 ACRES OF LAND.FARM WAS HIS FIRST DREAM.SO HE RENTED THEIR 40 ACRES.I TOO KNOW GOD IS AN AWSOME GOD.
TO MAKE A LONG STORY SHORT HE DECIDED TO GO INTO CATFISH FARMING AND THAT WAS NOT A GOOD IDEA FRO US.WE LOST ALL WE HAD WORKED FOR 42 YRS AND IT WAS ALL GONE .DEPRESSION WAS NOT EVEN CLOSE TO WHAT HE WENT INTO.HE CRIES WOULD NOT GO ANYWHERE WAS JUST IN A TOATL ANOTHER WORLD.
WITH GOD AS OUR CO -PILOT WE WILL SURVIVE.BOTH OF US ARE DISABLED ON A FIXED INCOME.WE RECENTLY DECIDED TO GIVE GOD HIS 10%.IS HARD TO DO THAT BUT WE ARE DEPENDING ON GOD.PHIL 4 13 SAYS I CAN DO ALL THINGS THRU CHRIST WHO STRENTHENS ME.MU FAVORITE SCRIPTURE IN BIBLE.
MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY
IN A WAY ONLY HE CAN DOJUST TRUST HIM TO DO WHAT HE PROMISED TRUST HIM .PRAISE HIM FOR ALL THINGS.
ANN
4/28/07 12:29 AM