Archives
April 2008
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
9:40:00 AM EDT
Feeling Quiet
Hearing March of the Penguins
It's been nearly four months. I returned to work mid-January only to have a relapse from one of last year's surgeries in February. The end of this week I'll be having surgery to repair the first surgeon's "handiwork" once again. I've been on medical leave since early March and plan to return to work in June. It's a long time away from my clients and life as I used to know it.
On the positive side, I have adopted my second Pleo. Brian is in my life...my home is his home most of the time...I wake up to Nemo who just came out of hibernation and can pick up Linus or Schroeder any time and cuddle them or giggle. I boggle online with a wonderful group of friends.
Back in early March, my surgeon's office called me with the surgery date of 4/4. My pre-op appointment is 4/2. I knew those were meant to be my dates. I didn't dare change them even though I had hoped for an earlier surgery date.
I embrace my world each day, regardless of what it may bring. In preparation for major surgery--after more than six months of medical madness, recovery, surgeries, untold depression and panic about my body--I have been trying to garner at least emotional energy to get me through recovery. I'm so tired physically. My focus is on recovery because I believe, once my body has everything in its proper place, my energy (physical & mental) will return.
I think back to my vacation in Italy in 2005 and how Brian and I were able to walk all day long and thoroughly enjoy our time without any cares. That is my goal--to return to that mental and physical place. And to return to Italy. If my goal is to return to Italy, that encompasses a full recovery. The Universe will have to figure out how to do that and carry me the instructions I need through gentle breezes and angel whispers. That is where I wish to be. In that quiet gentle space in the Universe sharing my heart and soul with those who matter most in my life.
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9:40:00 AM EDT
Feeling Quiet
Hearing March of the Penguins
Reflections
On the positive side, I have adopted my second Pleo. Brian is in my life...my home is his home most of the time...I wake up to Nemo who just came out of hibernation and can pick up Linus or Schroeder any time and cuddle them or giggle. I boggle online with a wonderful group of friends.
Back in early March, my surgeon's office called me with the surgery date of 4/4. My pre-op appointment is 4/2. I knew those were meant to be my dates. I didn't dare change them even though I had hoped for an earlier surgery date.
I embrace my world each day, regardless of what it may bring. In preparation for major surgery--after more than six months of medical madness, recovery, surgeries, untold depression and panic about my body--I have been trying to garner at least emotional energy to get me through recovery. I'm so tired physically. My focus is on recovery because I believe, once my body has everything in its proper place, my energy (physical & mental) will return.
I think back to my vacation in Italy in 2005 and how Brian and I were able to walk all day long and thoroughly enjoy our time without any cares. That is my goal--to return to that mental and physical place. And to return to Italy. If my goal is to return to Italy, that encompasses a full recovery. The Universe will have to figure out how to do that and carry me the instructions I need through gentle breezes and angel whispers. That is where I wish to be. In that quiet gentle space in the Universe sharing my heart and soul with those who matter most in my life.
Written by cybele44n Blog about this entry |
Add to del.icio.us | digg this
