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12:00:00 PM EDT
~ Saturday ~
There are days...sometimes more than I want to admit to, that I'd like to resign my membership in the "Mom Club". Hey, whoever made the statement "it gets easier as they get older"...well, tell them to send their personal Bird of Paradise this way.
I knew when all of my children started school, and truly found they had "minds of their own" there was trouble ahead. Ha! I truly prefer newborns to age 5...where they still "fear" God, Mom and adults in general. I wasn't as strict with my kids as my folks were with me; yet, I didn't ascribe to the theory that a good butt whipping would forever alter their little egos/self-esteem. There are times [now], when I think I should have "whacked" them a lot more than I did. Grrrrrr
One of mine just called me a few minutes ago, to make me the "bad guy" because I had asked my dad to go by and pickup the laptop computer I had loaned to them, months ago. Never mind that there isn't even dial-up access in their apt. any longer; or that 2 months ago they had to call me to ask for the serial number on the computer because it had been stolen. Oh, it was recovered...from a person or entity it had been pawned to. *A longer, "funky" story goes to the pawn issue.*
I took all this in stride, I wasn't happy, but I didn't yell/scream, etc. My husband...that's another story. In this phone call I was asked by my child: "How do you think it made me feel for grandpa to come in [my place] with your hand-written note [to him] saying you wanted the computer?" The conversation wasn't a happy one. Child was sort of "aired-out" by Mom for some of the inexcusable ways they do things.
I really wanted to say: "I don't give a damn how it made you feel; how do you think I felt when I had to tell my husband you and yours had been so careless with something I loaned you?" Instead, I held that thought...gotta keep peace, right?
If I didn't have a grandchild involved in this, I would tell my child and the significant other they "should both grow up, and pull their respective heads outta their respective butts". I've grown weary of waiting for the maturing of these people. Their chronological ages belie the age of their minds/actions.
I shall now go bang my ahead against the wall, and mentally kick myself in the pants for not being tougher on each and every one of my brood.
The only glee to be found is one day their children will grow up and... tee hee tee hee
Have a most enjoyable Saturday, everyone. : )
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Tina,
I'm seriously thinking of trying to invent a "grow up, act your age" pill for these two. Yesterday, the significant other called me to ask [hold on y'all]..."if there is a "u" in wonderful". I said yes, and spelled the word, the SO then said "bye"! *shakes head*
I hope you're continuing to feel well, and that your girls are doing well. -
Monica,
That's the way I feel...it's harder now that they're older. When I was still working, and before the grandkids came along, I missed/or had to leave work more than I did when they were small.
I'll tell him what I think, when I have him cornered at the beach with us. LOL The "opinion of Mom" just won't be filled with spitfire by that time. *winks* He knows I was put out with him, and he did get a semi-scolding.
Hope things are going well with you and yours. -
I haven't found it to be easier now that my children are older. If anything at times it's harder and I feel disconnected at times from them. I think it would've been okay to say what you wanted - they need to know it was a TWO way street.
Wishing you the best!
Monica
http://journals.aol.com/monicasmemoirs/midnight-conversatio ns/
http://journals.aol.com/photographybymon/Mamarazzi/ -
grandchild or not, I think it would be okay to tell them that. reality bites and getting bitten every now and then doesn't hurt anyone...
take care and hugs!
tina
5/7/08 5:32 PM
Generally, I don't hand out to my kids unless it's and exteme situation. Yet, I loathe the attitude of "I'm your kid and you will do for me, just because I am." Out of my 4 only 1 doesn't seem to possess this attitude. Guess that's what happens when one parent coddles/buys them off and the other [me] expects them to at least make a concerted effort to handle life on their own.
I would have been livid with the situation you've described with Skye. My mom used to tell me if there came a time I never wanted what she and/or dad had given me, to ask if they wanted it back before I did anything else with it. That used to puzzle me, but now, I truly understand.
Hope you and Doc are well!