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Pre-Jock Is Making New Rules
Dave over at Premature Jockularity and I go back about a year and a half as he's one of the forefathers of sports blogging here on AOL and has always been a favorite of mine. Anyway, he posted "some new rules", so I thought I'd share them and agree, disagree, whatnot:
"ANY ATHLETE WHO CLAIMS REPORTS OF HIS TAKING STEROIDS ARE WRONG MUST TAKE OFF HIS SHIRT."
I know this has to do with using back acne as evidence, but I'd rather not.
TO's GATORADE AND DREW ROSENHAUS' RED BULL MUST BE IMMEDIATELY REPLACED WITH STFU.
What's STFU?
ANY HOTTIE ACTRESS, SINGER, ADULT ENTERTAINER OR FEMALE ATHLETE WHO'S EVER POSED FOR MAXIM OR FHM MUST TAKE THE ANNA BENSON PLEDGE IF SHE MARRIES A MALE ATHLETE.
Make it so.
KEITH JACKSON MUST CALL THE ROSE BOWL, OR ANY ABC GAME WITH NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP IMPLICATIONS.
Let's add all Redskins games to this list.
THE RED SOX MUST REASSIGN LARRY LUCCHINO AND KEEP HIM AWAY FROM BASEBALL DECISIONS.
I'd rather have Lucchino calling the shots than Peter Angelos.
THOSE PEOPLE WHO CRITICIZE THE IRAQ WAR BUT VOTED FOR BUSH IN 2004 MUST WRITE MICHAEL MOORE A LETTER OF APOLOGY.
How'd this get in here?
ANY NBA PLAYER WHO MOANS ABOUT THE DRESS CODE SHOULD PUT UP OR SHUT UP.
Unless that player is A.I., because he's straight gangsta.
THE PROVIDENCE COLLEGE STUDENT SITTING BEHIND ME AT THE PC-BU HOCKEY GAME TONIGHT MUST WRITE A BOOK EXPLAINING HIS SECRETS.
Only if he's as cool as that kid at Miamity.
BILL MAHER MUST PULL HIMSELF TOGETHER.
I guess.
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Typical mindless jackass.... I guess kicking somebody's ass is still better than sex with a woman for him!!
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Why did I read this? Crap, how did I get to this point to where I am responding? Oh, the insanity of it all.
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NO THEY DON'T ANYBODY AGAINST WIPING OUT IRAQ IS NUTS
11/20/05 10:09 PM