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Family Matters [2]
I did something yesterday I haven't done in months. I got home early from work (and by "early" I mean 6pm not 7, 7:30pm or later). I've been beat the past few days. The plan was that the sitter would stay to feed and bathe the kids while I took a little time to relax before bedtime. We all sat together for dinner--the kids were in exceptionally cheery moods. No bickering, no problems. Bath time came and L, who's 5, demanded that I do it. "Please let Mommy rest for a bit and then I'll put you to bed," I implored. "But I haven't seen you all day!" he cried.
Sigh...what was I gonna do?
So many of my years of motherhood were spent at home, juggling part-time writing assignments and full-time mom duties. Late afternoon through bedtime were always tough: I'm tired, they're tired and we're all kind of sick of each other. Now that I'm working full-time, though, day's end is really the start of our quality time together.
I gave him a bath, then watched as my almost 10-year-old daughter directed her puppy dog brother in a couple of hysterical song and dance performances followed by an impromptu yoga class ("No, L, that's downward dog not upward dog!") conducted on my bed.
By the time I tucked the little one in, I was thoroughly entertained and invigorated. Laying down to face him, I said "You know, you were right, spending time with you guys was just what I needed to relax."
"Love," he said quietly. "That's what you needed, Mommy. It's good for you!"
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I don't believe it to be a war between "enemies" but two fronts composed of women who want what is the best for their children. I was a Mom who worked part-time when we had our first son and due to some events couldn't have a family member care for him after our second son was born. Then I continued to stay home when we had another son. The financial issue is very tough, but I am lucky on one aspect to stay at home to be part of their daily life. Also, it is very hard to be a stay at home Mom because there isn't a separation between work and family. It is a struggle to keep your sanity and intellect when dealing with a preschooler and two toddlers. Society has to remember that not all things follow the same "norm" so what works and is good for one family isn't for the next. Children are so precious and so are those early years that they don't fret over if you are staying at home or working but that you are the "best Mom" and they love you and you love them.
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WAY TO GO MOMMY, L, AND YOGA SISTER!!!
jstone give it a rest!!!
your children are grown up from where dori and many of us are. more power to the mommy that takes the time out to be able to get it all gathered and then end a evening much better than stressed and yelling mama, that needes a time out before it gets worse and then she has to fall into the bed tense and continue a cycle that we have all been in.
it feels great to have a little help once and a while.
when god wrote the instruction manual on women/mothers I am sure he said something to the effect...the better we take care of ourself the better we can take care of the world around us. ANY great husband or wife will support me in this, when mama is not happy ain't NOBODY happy.
many parents are doing the best they can and when a parent wants to blog/brag about a nice night, by gosh let them. we all want to live the perfect life and hours, but some times the 30 minunte time we give ourself and pay a nanny/babysitter, is worth every cent and mininute!
speaking very proud to be a CRAZY mother of 3 young children, working 12hour shifts and then some, 40 hours of call in a week to boot, with a husband that works the off shifts to be successful at running two small companys (80-100 hours a week) and the most important our nanny/sitter. with out her to help, we would never be the successful crazy family that we are.
thankyou to the children that know what we need! even if it is a little barney or wiggle dance. and thankyou to the nanny/sitter/family and friends that let us put ourself in time out.
no matter what kind of mother or woman you are take care of you, and respect the mothers and women who do the best job they can at being the CEO of their life and families, and the way they do it. -
Excuse me--but didn't you have these children? And did you not think that you (not a sitter) would have to RAISE these children?????????
And did you only take on children when they were CHEERY (your words, not mine)?
Did you really think that you could RELAX? (your words, not mine).
I'M SORRY--MINE ARE 12 & 17 AND MY SITTER LEFT YEARS AGO! I WORK FULL TIME AND I JUGGLE--YOU NEED TO GET OVER YOUR PRINCESS/QUEEN COMPLEX AND JOIN THE 'REAL WORLD'. GET HOME EARLIER AND DEAL WITH IT.
3/31/06 4:39 PM
Debi Hoppe