Archives
10:25:00 AM EDT
Feeling Depressed
Lost Friendships
Thank you Sugar for this lovely tag.
Good Morning everyone. I hope all of you are doing well. I'm sitting here looking at this entry and for the life of me I can't figure out what to write. Can you believe that? Me speechless, lol? Ok let me see if I can write something. Well, Jim was downstairs with Joe the other day. I was at Emma's. Out of the blue Jim says Joe started again, saying I was excess baggage, I was fat and lazy and holding Jim back. I guess my talk with Jim worked, because he blew up at Joe. Alot of mean things were said and Joe told Jim to get out of his house and to move. Which we are already planning on doing come Aug 1st. I still caan't figure out why Joe hates me so much. I have never said or done anything wrong to him. I have always been there for him as a friend and care giver to his Mom. I've run errands for him like grocery store, bank, post office. I've cooked for his dinner parties, I've had him over for dinner numerous times, and he even went to a few of my doctor appointments and chemo treatments with me. I thought he was my friend, a member of my family. But I guess he felt otherwise. It all has me very depressed. Jim says things will be better once we are moved. I sure hope so.
My son in law Dan may have to have more back surgery. His doctor seems to think one of the screws in Dan's back shifted and is causing him so much more pain. Dan will be having a Cat Scan soon to find out. I will let you know the results. Please pray no more surgery is needed.
On a happier note............Jim is back in the work force. A place he applied at the same week he was laid off called him in. He is so happy. This is a huge company, with excellent benefits and a great dental plan. I will finally be able to get the rest of these teeth pulled and dentures. I can go back to my cancer doctor and make sure I am still in remission. And I can go to my family doctor to see if I can get that bypass surgery to lose this weight. I want to lose at least 175 pounds.
My mood the past couple months has been really bad. Emma told me Jim told her that he don't know what to do for me because I don't open up and talk to him. I have never been one to talk about myself to my family. I feel so much more comfortable just writing here to all of you. So last night I had a thought. I can't talk openly in person but I can write. So I sat down, got up the courage and wrote Jim a 5 page letter, explaining all that is going on, and what I am feeling. I hope now I can get up the courage to give him this letter.
Well, that's about all there is to write about. There's probably more, but I can't think right now. Going up to 90 today, BLAHHHHHHH. And rain tomorrow, double BLAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Love you all.................................CINDY
Written by emabecmar Blog about this entry |
Add to del.icio.us | 
digg this
-
I'm just checking in with you, and hope you are feeling better. Remember you have lots of friends who care about you.
Hugs,
Pat -
First off you are awesome girl and don't let anybody tell you otherwise. I'm sorry about this deal with Joe and feel like he must be really miserable and hurting to come at you all like he has. Did you ever think that maybe he is jealous of the fact that you and your husband have a great marriage and wonderful family. Joe has no one and I think he's finally figuring out he's gonna be a lonely old man. Usually we hurt the ones we love because they won't hate us for what we say, if that makes any sense. I'm so happy about the new job and the insurance that means so much. Let us know how Dan comes out. I'm so happy to hear that you are finally moving. You'll see things will be better then.
Take care and Hugs, Chrissie -
i thought i had friends online and many who knew my intimate life and thoughts turned on me in an instant without explanation. For awhile i cared and let their evil words and meanness hurt me deeply...then two teens in my city hung themselves and died this year from online bullying so i then knew it was time to move on from things i could not control...you may never know what this dude dislikes you but you can take control, move on and let him live in his misery. You know you have done nothing wrong and YOU are a WONDERFUL person! Make sure you give me your new address quick when you move so my mail gets to you.
I am so glad Jim got a job! What a blessing!
XO -
Cindy I cannot belive that Joe is acting like this towards you ~ but I can say he is the loser ~ and really not worthy of your friendship ~ I am so pleased that Jim defended you ~ Ally x
7/7/08 8:57 AM
Michelle