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Friday, July 25, 2008
1:51:33 PM EDT
Sorry folks, more on Obama...LOL!
It's unreal, Obama's camp really believes they can make an excuse such as "out of respect" for not visiting our wounded at Landstuhl. While I heard about this, this morning at 6 am, I pondered and came to this conclusion. The military wouldn't allow him his media coverage to go in. That's why he canceled the visit. And then I went to bed to get some shut eye.
I woke up a couple of hours ago, as usual, my routine is to turn on the news. First thing off the cuff, I hear Major Garrett reporting from London on Fox News. Lo and behold, he's talking about Obama's cancellation of the trip to Landstuhl. Obama's camp stating that the Pentagon had warned them it would be seen as a campaign trip and the Pentagon stating they had not told them that. Garrett reported however, the Pentagon had said, Obama's media circle would not be allowed into the hospital. They would be accompanied by a military still photographer during his visit. Just as it is SOP for any other Senator visiting a military hospital. Ahhhhhhaaaaaa!!! If Obama had been serious about truly wanting to be with our wounded and speak with them, he would have went to Landstuhl. He would have been there anyway, even though the "paparazzi" would not be allowed in. The bottom line is, he didn't get the PR he wanted so like a petulant child he just didn't go. Here is the measure of the man, when the opportunity to do the right thing presents itself, he and his camp chooses to lie about the circumstances and tries to make themselves look good in the midst of it. "Out of respect", my A$$!
Quite frankly, I'm glad he didn't go. I'm glad our wounded didn't have to put up with him. They have more important things to do, like getting well. I cringe at the thought of him in the same room with our finest and bravest, do to the fact that Obama doesn't deserve such company. I am quite sure Obama has no clue as to what honor, integrity, sacrifice and duty means. Other than a punch line given in a speech to make the American public think he has those qualities. Obama's only goal is to make it to Pennsylvania Avenue and it doesn't matter who he throws under the bus to get there. It appears this week, it's our service member's turn. NO, not this time! I refuse to allow it to happen! Like many others, I will speak out about the disrespect shown to our military by the Obama machine. He and his camp are disrespecting someone I love and his family. He's disrespecting my friends and their families....and the list goes on to many others I don't know, who sacrifice for his freedoms. What Obama sees as business as usual, I see as personal. He's failed to get the big picture! Based on this observation alone, he does not deserve to be Commander in Chief!! When will the American public and media finally get it?
Another observation by a service member during an Obama "visit":
More Witness Email - Senator Obama's PR Tour
Posted By Blackfive
Here's another email about Senator Obama's visit to a base in a combat zone from an impeccable source - the first to paragraphs are redacted to protect the author (a 23 year vet of more than one branch of the military):
MY MEETING (ALMOST) WITH OBAMA <...> I had a first hand view of Barrack Obama's "fact finding" mission, when he passed through this base.
While I can't name it, it's one of the largest air bases in the region, with up to 8000 troops (depending on influxes and transients in mobilization/demobilization status), mostly Airmen and Soldiers, but some Marines, Sailors, Koreans, Japanese, Aussies, Brits, US Civil Service, contractors including KBR, Blackwater and Halliburton, among others in the news. The overwhelming majority of all of these are professional, courteous and disciplined. Problems are rare.
Casualties are also rare. This base has a large hospital for evacuation—twenty plus beds. I have yet to see a casualty in one, though I am told there are about three evacuations a week through this region, of which two on average are things like sports injuries, vehicle accidents or duty related falls and such. You can tell from the news that the war is going well. The ghouls are now focusing on Afghanistan, since there is no blood to type with here.
This oped is of course subjective and limited, but I will try to present the facts as I saw them. I wasn't able to see much, which makes a point all by itself.
When his plane arrived (also containing Senators Reed and Hagel, but the news has hardly mentioned them), there was a "ramp freeze." This means if you are on the flight line, and not directly involved with the event in question, you stay where you are and don't move. For a combat flight arriving or departing, this takes about ten minutes, and involves the active runway and crossing taxiways only. For Obama's flight, this took 90 minutes, during which time a variety of military missions came grinding to a halt. Obviously, this visit was important, right?
95% of base wanted nothing to do with him. I have met three troops who support him, and literally hundreds who regard him as a buffoon, a charlatan, a hindrance to their mission or a flat out enemy of progress. Even when the rumors were publicly admitted, almost no one left their duty sections to try to see him, unless they were officers whose presence was officially required.
Mister Obama's motorcade drove up from the flight line and entered the dining hall toward the end of lunch time. Diners were chased out and told to make other arrangements for food, in the middle of the duty day.
Now, there are close to 8000 troops on the base and its nearby satellites. No one came up from the Army side (except perhaps a few ranking officers). The airbase resumed operation, once he cleared the flightline, as if nothing had happened. The dining hall holds about 300 people and was not full. The troops did not want to meet him and the feeling was apparently mutual. In attendance, besides the Official Entourage, were the base's senior officers, some support personnel, and a very few carefully vetted supporters who'd made special arrangements. No photos were allowed. No question and answer with the troops. No real acknowledgment that the troops existed.
Obama left around 1530, during the Muslim Call to Prayer, so he's not a practicing Muslim. He was in a convoy guarded by (so I'm told) both State Department and Secret Service Personnel.
Less than three hours…
Within 48 hours he was in Afghanistan. It takes most troops longer than that to in-process and get cleared on safety, threats, policies and such. Yet he somehow made a strategic summary by not talking to anyone and not seeing anything.
Twenty-four hours after that, he was in Kuwait, back here, and then home, so fast we didn't even know he arrived the second time at this base.
I can't imagine any officer of the few he met told him anything other than what they tell the troops, and what their own leadership at the Pentagon tell them—we're winning. Our troops are stomping the guts out of the insurgency. The surge worked and is working. If the insurgents have to divert to Afghanistan, it means they can't fight in Iraq anymore. We should not change the rules and retreat with the enemy on the ropes as we did in Vietnam. We should finish kicking their teeth in. The Iraqi government now controls 10 of 18 provinces, with US assistance in the rest. Let us win the war. 90% of the troops I know, even those opposed to the war, say that is the way to win. Victory comes from winning, not from "change." In fact, the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs is on record as opposing Obama's strategic theory.
Since he obviously knew in advance that's what they'd tell him, and since he didn't care to talk to the troops (we're told by the Left that the troops are horrified, shocked, forced to commit atrocities with tears in their eyes, distraught, burned out, fed up with losing, etc) and find out how they feel, and was barely in country long enough to need a shower and a change of clothes, we can only call this for what it is.
A disgraceful PR stunt, using the troops as a platform for his ego and campaign.
In comparison, I've seen four star generals and the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff on this base. They each held an all ranks call, met with and briefed the personnel, and took questions on every subject from tour length to uniform design to rules of engagement to weapon choice to long term policy, from the newest airmen to the senior NCO with TEN 120-180 day tours since Sep 11. It's very clear they want to know what the troops think, and to keep them informed of events. It's equally clear mister Obama does not.
From here we must move to my op part of the oped.
Obama clearly doesn't care about the troops, doesn't care about America, doesn't care about anything except hearing his own voice and the chance to sit at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue…From where he'll bring us the proven Democratic wartime leadership of Bosnia and the Balkans (US forces still there), Somalia (US forces prevailed despite being ill equipped by executive order, and taking heavy casualties), Haiti (what were we doing there again?), Desert One (oops?), Vietnam (where we snatched defeat from the jaws of victory), Korea (still there), WWI, and the fluke success of WWII won by such wonderful liberal notions as concentration camps for Japanese Americans, nukes, FBI investigations of waitresses who dated soldiers in case they were "morally corrupt" and the (valid) occupation of and continued presence in Italy, Japan and Germany for 60 years, which they are conveniently pretending won't happen with Iraq.
That's not "change." That's "failure we can do without."
Never give up! Never give in! Never let go!
Written by flashbangfury
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Wednesday, July 23, 2008
2:08:32 PM EDT
Just as I thought....
Reading Blackfive today, there is a letter posted there that you all should read from Afghanistan. This is the reason I read Blackfive, this is the reason I read about our service members. It's their perspective I want to hear and what they see as their truth on the ground. Like it or not, America, the embedded reporters and media with Obama would have never wrote this. Because it's the truth!
From G.I. in Afghanistan - "We got more thanks from the Dallas cowboy Cheerleaders" than from Senator Obama
Posted By Blackfive
This is from a USAF friend in Afghanistan:
Hello everyone,
As you know I am not a very political person. I just wanted to pass along that Senator Obama came to Bagram Afghanistan for about an hour on his visit to ' The War Zone ' . I wanted to share with you what happened.
He got off the plane and got into a bullet proof vehicle, got to the area to meet with the Major General (2 Star) who is the commander here at Bagram.
As the Soldiers where lined up to shake his hand, he blew them off and didn't say a word as he went into the conference room to meet the General. As he finished, the vehicles took him to the ClamShell (pretty much a big top tent that military personnel can play basketball or work out in with weights) so he could take his publicity pictures playing basketball. He again shunned the opportunity to talk to Soldiers to thank them for their service.
So really he was just here to make a showing for the Americans back home that he is their candidate for President. I think that if you are going to make an effort to come all the way over here you would thank those that are providing the freedom that they are providing for you.
I swear we got more thanks from the NBA Basketball Players or the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders than from one of the Senators, who wants to be the President of the United States . I just don't understand how anyone would want him to be our Commander-and-Chief. It was almost that he was scared to be around those that provide the freedom for him and our great country.
If this is blunt and to the point I am sorry but I wanted you all to know what kind of caliber of person he really is. What you see in the news is all fake.
In service,
CPT J Bagram, Afghanistan
CPT J, THANK YOU for your service, be safe and come home soon!
Never give up! Never give in! Never let go!
Written by flashbangfury
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Monday, July 21, 2008
11:27:43 AM EDT
Obama visits Middle East
Or maybe should I say he's "dropped in". I read some articles from Fox News and CNN about his "visits" to Kuwait, Afghanistan and Iraq thus far. Yeah, I'm not waiting for him to fly out of Iraq today, I'm already going to criticize the man for his "knock" and "talk" attitude to his visit to the region. He spent a few hours in Kuwait on Saturday and was off to Afghanistan that same day....at least he spent more than 12 hours in Afghanistan. Early this morning he flew into Iraq and he's apparently scheduled to fly out later today to either Israel or Jordan.
Three days in three countries, sounds like the brochure for a fast and furious visit you can take in Europe to try to see "everything" in a whirlwind vacation. How in the sam hill do you go on a fact finding trip when you spend no more than a hand full of hours in Iraq and approximately 36 hours in Afghanistan. What facts do you think you will reap from this half-a$$ed attempt to spend time in these countries? What do you think you will see? Not much that is for sure.
Per Fox News' article, which is laughingly called "Obama Begins on the Ground Inspection of Iraq", it stated he arrived there earlier in the morning today's date. He's expected to meet with PM al-Maliki and General Petraeus today and he's leaving for Jordan/Israel later in the day. What ground is he inspecting? The Green Zone. Have a Whopper at the Burger King there on me, Barack, if you have time.
He was in Afghanistan for part of Saturday and all day Sunday. He visited troops and commanders there for an undisclosed amount of time. And met with President Karzai for two hours. Two hours? That's it. Obama articulates how important Afghanistan is in his recent speeches, but doesn't speak with the man more than 2 hours? In the CNN article I found, last week Obama said "As should havebeen apparent to President Bush and Senator McCain, the central front in the war on terror is not Iraq, and it never was.". Hmmmmm....I've recently read Disinformation by Richard Mintor. He's given information in the book of intelligence from Iraqi officials about al-Qaeda training camps in Iraq all the way back in 1997. Also the basis of an agreement between Saddam and al-Qaeda that consists of "you don't bother me, I won't bother you". I think Obama should read this book, it would be enlightening for him. Afghanistan was just a start in this GWOT. At Fox News and CNN websites, I've found 2 more quotes by Obama. In an interview Obama gave yesterday to CBS News as quoted by Fox, Obama said "1 to 2 brigades should be redirected to Afghanistan to bolster efforts.". Per the CNN article Obama said in the CBS News interview, "For at least a year now, I have called for 2 additional brigades, perhaps three.". For a year? Ok, I must have been asleep or under a rock, if anyone can send me an article dated in July, 2007 about Obama stating this, send it to me. Also, where did he get this figure from? He couldn't have thought of it himself, because he doesn't have a clue and has his head buried in the sand about anything that goes on on the ground in Afghanistan, just as he does with Iraq. I don't ever recall that he's spoken with commanders on the ground or even talked with anyone that has the knowledge about what is needed there. Within the past week, apparently by osmosis, has he attained knowledge about military strategy and logistics? Is Obama suggesting...gasp!....a surge in Afghanistan? The very same strategy that he said wouldn't work in Iraq.
This visit of Obama's is a "political drive by" and basically he's taking a "shot" at looking presidential. He's declaring the visit a congressional fact finding trip, but as far as I'm concerned he, along with his two Senate cronies with him, are burning yours and my tax dollars for a political show. He's got money out the wazzoo in his campaign funds, spend your own damn money for your political exploits, not mine. He's not making a serious attempt at finding out what is happening in Afghanistan and Iraq. He's making a half-a$$ed attempt at it because of the pressure he felt from criticism about not going to Iraq for over 2 years. He quite frankly has already made his policies public on what he intends to do about the Middle East and he's going through the motions. We have a name for that kind of person and I know my Mom would appreciate it if I don't write it in this forum.
Never give up! Never give in! Never let go!
Written by flashbangfury
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Sunday, July 20, 2008
11:46:16 PM EDT
Topsy Turvy Tomatoes
Mom ordered the craziest thing a couple of months ago. It's called a topsy turvy. And you can grow apparently just about anything in it. Mom loves fresh grown tomatoes, so she thought it would be great to get one of these doo-hickeys. We got it a month ago and the very same day we went out and bought a tomato plant for it. The plant was pretty much a twig with about 12 leaves coming off of it. Well, look at what it is today.....

You plant the plant upside down in this thing, it's centered by some heavy foam. Then you fill up the bag with soil. It has a cover on it with a hole so you can water it. But you have to be Kareem Abdul Jabaar to water the thing. I have to get a step stool. As luck would have it, we do have about 10-12 flowers on the tomato plant. Which means, there will be tomatoes sometime in August. That is if I keep watering it like every hour (sarcasm...lol). The weather here has turned pretty hot and very humid.
So, this is my new project I've been working on for the past month. I wasn't sure if it would work, but by the looks of things, it's doing pretty good. Whoever invented this thing has to be raking in the dough. And also the miracle grow soil people are as well. The instructions tell you it's best to use a soil with fertilizer in it, like miracle grow.
Never give up! Never give in! Never let go!
Written by flashbangfury
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6:43:06 PM EDT
Food for thought....
Got the following in an email from Melissa....just some interesting food for thought....
The Jihad Candidate
By Rich Carroll
Conspiracy theories make for interesting novels when the storyline is not so absurd that it can grasp our attention. 'The Manchurian Candidate' and 'Seven Days in May' are examples of plausible chains of events that captures the reader's imagination at best-seller level. 'What if' has always been the solid grist of fiction.
Get yourself something cool to drink, find a relaxing position, but before you continue, visualize the television photos of two jet airliners smashing into the Twin Towers in lower Manhattan and remind yourself this cowardly act of Muslim terror was planned for eight years.
How long did it take Islam and their oil money to find a candidate for President of the United States ? As long as it took them to place a Senator from Illinois and Minnesota ? The same amount of time to create a large Muslim enclave in Detroit ? The time it took them to build over 2,000 mosques in America ? The same amount of time required to place radical wahabbist clerics in our military and prisons as 'chaplains'?
Find a candidate who can get away with lying about their father being a 'freedom fighter' when he was actually part of the most corrupt and violent government in Kenya 's history. Find a candidate with close ties to The Nation of Islam and the violent Muslim overthrow in Africa , a candidate who is educated among white infidel Americans but hides his bitterness and anger behind a superficial toothy smile. Find a candidate who changes his American name of Barry to the Muslim name of Barak Hussein Obama, and dares anyone to question his true ties under the banner of 'racism'. Nurture this candidate in an atmosphere of anti-white American teaching and surround him with Islamic teachers. Provide him with a bitter, racist, anti-white, anti-American wife, and supply him with Muslim middle east connections and Islamic monies. Allow him to be clever enough to get away with his anti-white rhetoric and proclaim he will give $834 billion taxpayer dollars to the Muslim controlled United Nations for use in Africa .
Install your candidate in an atmosphere of deception because questioning him on any issue involving Africa or Islam would be seen as 'bigoted racism'; two words too powerful to allow the citizenry to be informed of facts. Allow your candidate to employ several black racist Nation of Islam Louis Farrakhan followers as members of his Illinois Senatorial and campaign staffs.
Where is the bloodhound American 'free press' who doggedly overturned every stone in the Watergate case? Where are our nation's reporters that have placed every Presidential candidate under the microscope of detailed scrutiny; the same press who pursue Bush's 'Skull and Bones' club or ran other candidates off with persistent detective and research work? Why haven't 'newsmen' pursued the 65 blatant lies told by this candidate during the Presidential primaries? Where are the stories about this candidate's cousin and the Muslim butchery in Africa ? Since when did our national press corps become weak, timid, and silent? Why haven't they regaled us with the long list of socialists and communists who have surrounded this 'out of nowhere' Democrat candidate or that his church re-printed the Hamas Manifesto in their bulletin, and that his 'close pastor friend and mentor' met with Middle East terrorist Moammar Gaddafi, (Guide of the First of September Great Revolution of the Socialist People's Libyan Arab Jamahiriya)? Why isn't the American press telling us this candidate is supported by every Muslim organization in the world?
As an ultimate slap in the face, be blatant in the fact your candidate has ZERO interest in traditional American values and has the most liberal voting record in U.S. Senate history. Why has the American main stream media clammed-up on any negative reporting on Barak Hussein Obama? Why will they print Hillary Rodham Clinton's name but never write his middle name? Is it not his name? Why, suddenly, is ANY information about this candidate not coming from main stream media, but from the blogosphere by citizens seeking facts and the truth? Why isn't our media connecting the dots with Islam? Why do they focus on 'those bad American soldiers' while Islam slaughters non Muslims daily in 44 countries around the globe? Why does our media refer to Darfur as 'ethnic cleansing' instead of what it really is; Muslims killing non Muslims! There is enough strange, anti- American activity surrounding Barak Hussein Obama to peek the curiosity of any reporter. WHERE IS OUR INVESTIGATIVE MEDIA!?
A formal plan for targeting America was devised three years after the Iranian revolution in 1982. The plan was summarized in a 1991 memorandum by Mohamed Akram, an operative of the global Muslim Brotherhood. 'The process of settlement' of Muslims in America , Akram explained, 'is a civilization jihad process.' This means that members of the Brotherhood must understand that their work in 'America is a kind of grand jihad in eliminating and destroying the Western civilization from within and sabotaging its miserable house by their hands and the hands of the believers so that it is eliminated and God's religion is made victorious over all other religions.'
There is terrorism we can see, smell and fear, but there is a new kind of terror invading The United States in the form of Sharia law and finance. Condoning it is civilization suicide. Middle East Muslims are coming to America in record numbers and building hate infidel mosques, buying our corporations, suing us for our traditions, but they and the whole subject of Islam is white noise leaving uninformed Americans about who and what is really peaceful. Where is our investigative press? Any criticism of Islam or their intentions, even though Islamic leaders state their intentions daily around the globe, brings-forth a volley of 'racist' from the left-wing Democrat crowd.
Lies and deception behind a master plan - the ingredients for 'The Manchurian Candidate' or the placement of an anti-American President in our nation's White House? Is it mere coincidence that an anti-capitalist run for President at the same time Islamic sharia finance and law is trying to make advancing strides into the United States ? Is it mere coincidence this same candidate wants to dis-arm our nuclear capability at a time when terrorist Muslim nations are expanding their nuclear weapons capability? Is it mere coincidence this candidate wants to reduce our military at a time of global jihad from Muslim nations?
Change for America ?
What change?
To become another 'nation of Islam'? What is wrong with the people in this country that they would even think about voting for this guy?? Are they ostriches with their heads in the sand??
Never give up! Never give in! Never let go!
Written by flashbangfury
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Friday, July 18, 2008
1:08:44 PM EDT
Sadness and Joy
I've come across two blog posts I'd like to share today. In the matter of a small space and time, I've experienced sadness and joy. The two posts of fellow bloggers ( although I dare to put myself in their league) are important to repeat. They both are well written and need to be out there based on the information. Most importantly because you aren't seeing this in the media.
Sadness.....losing 9 Americans in the Kunar raid on July 13th. This was posted on Mail Call. A great blog by a Soldiers Angel. I saw this on the news earlier this week, but you don't get this perspective from a 10 second sound bit on a news show. Although, I realize the news media has to get in their stories about what Hollywood stars are doing to wreck their lives. I could care less about the sleazy divorces, DWI's, drug arrests and tax evasion. Take all that crap off and report something I care about and provide the substance of the real story. I know, wishful thinking. Thank God for Mail Call and the rest of the Military Bloggers out there trying to get the real story out....
MAIL CALL!Supporting the Troops
Remember their names, the nine who sacrificed and their families in your prayers.
Joy....Iraqis completing their training and commissioned. This was posted on Armed and Curious. I picked it up at Blackfive. It's a great post...
Armed and Curious: Finding Inspiration in Tears of Joy
This is what you don't see on the media. The REAL story.
Written by flashbangfury
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Monday, July 14, 2008
2:43:29 PM EDT
Someone we should know
I was reading Blackfive today and came across this link to "Someone you should know". It's an article about an English Soldier and his bride marrying.....get the Kleenex. It's important for all of us to remember we're not alone in this fight, our allies have severely injured soldiers of their own. Another reminder of "it's not just about us".
Most beautiful wedding of the year: Scarred soldier marries his sweetheart | Mail Online
Everyone raise a glass to Martyn and Michelle.....here's wishing their lives are blessed together and they have a healthy, happy and prosperous future!
Never give up! Never give in! Never let go!
Written by flashbangfury
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1:26:29 AM EDT
All of them are awake!!
I got an email from Melissa today, I think it's great and it gave me a moment to pause and think. Yeah, I've been thinking again....lol!
Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning,
Satan shudders & says...
'Oh shit...she's awake!!'
How have I lived my life to make "Satan shudder"? It's a question that some of us haven't thought of and others might think every day. I don't think it's just about Satan. Maybe it's about people that have evil in their hearts and in their doings every day. For instance, people like al Qaeda members and others like them who prefer death over life. Or people that lie, cheat and steal for sport. Killers, rapists, con artist. Or the neighbor down the street that can't find anything else better to do but gossip and tell lies about others in the neighborhood to stir up trouble. The drug dealer selling to our kids. A child molester taking away a child's innocence. A politician lining their own pocket and taking power from the people to keep it for their own. A government keeping it's people under tyrannic rule, without freedom or dignity. No, I don't want to live my life in such a way to just make Satan shudder, I want to live my life so that all evil doers will shudder. I know many others that are this way as well.
These folks are all around us if we look just right. They are honorable people, who want the best for their families. They would rather cheat themselves than another person. If they see a wrong, they stand up and speak to try to make it right. They step in and help people no matter who they are, stranger or friend. They help the hurt and needy in their own quiet way. For some, the most important thing to them is teaching their children between right and wrong. If a friend is having a bad day, they stop and listen, offer comforting words and quietly wish they could fix what was wrong. There are people that stand by their friends till the end, no matter what comes their way. There are spouses and significant others that are faithful and loyal to their love, no matter the hardships that come their way. And there are those that fight for the ones that can't fight for themselves.
I know a Solder,
a Mom,
a police officer,
a Veteran,
an Army Wife,
a Friend,
and a Gnome :),
when all of them wake up and their feet hit the floor, Satan and evil doers all shudder & say....."Shit! all of 'em are awake!!"
"No one can take away your honor, your dignity and your truth....only you can give it away." ---Me
Never give up! Never give in! Never let go!
Written by flashbangfury
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Wednesday, July 9, 2008
1:58:34 PM EDT
18 pounds closer
I got up this morning and weighed myself and lo and behold, 18 pounds are gone. After a mini-happy dance in the bathroom, I thought about it. I'm more than a third of the way to getting rid of the 50 pounds. The 50 pounds of stress, frustration and aggravation that I've put on through this separation from Rick. I feel 18 pounds lighter, but not in the way that most would feel. It's 18 pounds lighter of the stress, frustration and aggravation. Don't get me wrong, there will still be those things, even after I get to the 50 pound mark. But the added stress that I've inflicted on myself will be gone. Losing this weight is more than getting rid of a pudgy middle and beeping sounds and lights of the sign I feel is on my butt. (Wide load, LOL!) Hey, I can laugh at myself, it's part of the process!
For one, I feel like I'm healthier in mind and body. I've read a lot about emotional eating and I know I will always be recovering from this addiction. Using food to bring about a "fullness" where I feel empty otherwise. There are better things to accomplish this. Finding a joy, one joy each day has helped with this. And food is not that joy. Food is fuel to keep the body going. I've had to retrain my thoughts about food. It's not easy. It's a daily struggle. I've had to find other ways to comfort myself through this. Reading, talking with friends, rough housing with the dogs are among some of the things I've found my joy in. Turning my missing Rick into positive thoughts and not the negatives that make me feel empty. This is a daily struggle as well.
Never give up! Never give in! Never let go!
Written by flashbangfury
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Saturday, July 5, 2008
4:03:45 AM EDT
Always wondering...
It's late and even though it's July 5th, I'm still on July 4th. Today, I cooked out on the grill for lunch. Mom made taco salads for dinner. After dinner we decided to take the bonkeyroos out for a ride with the sunroof open. It was a pretty day, kind of cool this evening and the sky clear.
We stopped at Blockbuster and rented a few movies for the rest of the evening and went for a little drive to Sheridan's for a milk shake. WOW, if you've never had Sheridan's ice cream you are definitely missing out. Driving around we saw plenty of beautiful fireworks going off all over. We were out and about for all of an hour, but the drive was a treat because of the scenery we could take in from the night sky.
At certain moments, throughout today, I wondered. What's Rick doing right now? Is today a good day? I wondered if he was having a variation of a July 4th special meal or was it an MRE? Is he safe? Did he have their own version of fireworks or was it quiet? Did he have the chance to celebrate our nation's birthday or was it business as usual? Is he wondering what I'm doing today as well?
So many questions, but no immediate answers. I know today that I'm not the only one asking them, if only to myself. There are many significant others, families and friends with a service member on their mind constantly. I'm not alone in this journey, albeit the journey is different for all of us. And July 4th is another day without our loved ones beside us, because this is the practice for us on an everyday basis. We question and wonder and hope and pray. We sleep with the cell phone or land line next to the bed. The cell phone is attached wherever it can go with us. The computer stays on for quick email checks. We miss them so badly and when the call comes in or the email shows up, it's a combination "super bowl-world series-championship" happy dance of all time. I'vebeen seen in Walmart doing this dance and I don't care that I've frightened children and disturbed elderly people. What matters is Rick's voice on the other end of line and a conversation that starts with "Hi Baby...".
Never give up! Never give in! Never let go!
Written by flashbangfury
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