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8:51:00 AM EDT
Feeling Happy
"real School"
"I always wondered...do you think it will be hard for your girls to function in college or places like that if they have never been to a real school?
Comment from sugar1337"
The short answer is "No." I did not go to high school for the last two and a half years, and I did fine in college. I had three majors and earned two degrees in five years. Of course, I had already been in school and I had been institutionalized. I knew how to tolerate poor teaching, being talked down to, spending time on useless tasks and busy work, and memorizing stupid pieces of trivia and then forgetting them after the test. I knew about cliques and peer pressure. I graduated with honors.
My daughters have not ever been in school, but they have been in myriad classes and clubs. They do know how to raise their hands and sit quietly. They are rather intolerant of rude people and teachers who talk down to them. They are very intolerant of abusive teachers. We stopped riding lessons after the riding instructor was verbally abusive to Mandy and the other girls. Many girls cried after lessons. The instructor was surprised when I called her and told her we were stopping the lessons and why.
As much as Mandy and I love Aikido, Tabitha was ruined by boring children's classes years ago, and refuses to try them again.
I hope that they continue to be intolerant of people that treat them poorly. They do not have to remain in a horrible job or tolerate a bad teacher in college. They can always find a job or a teacher who is better suited.
I do worry at times that since their lives have been relatively stress free that work will be a rude shock for them. I was talking (lecturing ROFL) with Mandy about this yesterday, as she was envisioning how free her life will be when she is eighteen.
Ha.
I pointed out The Perfect Uncle Dave's quote he likes to cite attributed to Bill Gates. Paraphrased, it is that if you think your parents are hard on you, wait until you get a boss.
Mandy had a job for a year, cleaning up after the beauty shop down the street. She did just fine...although I did need to carp on her the concept of arriving on time. She has an Indian idea of time--"around" ten clock is good enough...that is a by-product ofour relaxed lifestyle. It is a skill that she can learn, though.
There are a few other odd by-products of their upbringing free from school. They have no concept of how important the week end is to most Americans. They usually aren't aware of what day it is, since most of their days flow one into the other. They do know their school friends are around more on the weekends, but they don't viserally understand what it means to have most of your waking hours devoted to spending time at a job or in school. The closest I can describe this would be remember when you were small how summers stretched out forever....well, their lives have been one endless summer vacation.
On the other hand, Tabitha and Mandy have many more household duties than their schooled friends. Their schooled friends sometimes comment on that. My retort is they are home twenty four hours a day, messing the house up, they can help clean it and run it. I think that these are vital life skills, anyway. In the end, knowing how to sort laundry, get stains out and hang stuff up will be more important than conjugating verbs. They are both good cooks, confident in the kitchen, and cook meals for themselves and for the family without even thinking about it. They both know how to care for a baby, change diapers, coax a young one into doing things. They can dress wounds, have excellent phone skills, and are confident with many kinds of animals. They know what happens during a Pap smear and childbirth. They know how to act with dying people and have been to many funerals. They are generous with their neighbors and have a strong sense of community. They know the value of volunteering and voting.
Both of the older girls are very popular with their peers--both schooled and homeschooled. They act pretty much like "normal" kids, but they are not very influenced by peer pressure...at least for long. They will go along with most things to fit in with a crowd as long as it doesn't make them feel bad, but neither smokes or drinks. They love to dress fashionably, but also like to dress eccentrically. One of the best things about homeschoolers is that they play. Mandy, at sixteen and a half, still plays Manhunt and plays with some toys. Both girls understand the value of introspection and keep journals and scrapbooks.
I hope they find jobs that are a joy to them. Tabitha in particular is very bright and academically agressive. I assumeshe will want higher education and a career, at least until she has children. Mandy wants to be a police officer and is already thinking about having her children someday.
I think they will do fine.
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they are already wonderful people and will continue to be so :) I was hoping you'd answer that question, and you did - beautifully
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They will be great! xoxo
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I think they will do great!!!
Lovish!
Connie -
what an entry.... I applaud you my friend. Very well said. So many do not understand the specialness of what you are giving your children. I am so glad to call you my friend. judi
9/22/04 8:48 AM