Hestia Homeschool for Young Wild Women

Mandy walked in and sat down and told me that she could not go to Florida to Aikido Winter Camp with "Uncle Molester." Then I wrote him this email: 

Mandy said that you stuck your tongue in her mouth when you kissed her goodbye the other day when you went to see the Corpse Bride...and that another time you pinched her nipple when she was over at your house, and that you touch her breast sometimes when you are cuddling. She does not want to go to Florida because she does not feel safe or comfortable.   I am hoping you can take someone else, like your mom.      

In a message dated 10/24/2005 12:45:36 A.M. Eastern Standard Time, ****** writes:

She has always flirted with me.  I told her I knew I had misunderstood and was sorry.  I feel rotten, especially that she does not feel safe with me.  I hope we can rebuild our friendship.  Until then, I will not be around and will find an excuse to cancel my plans with Tabby for this Friday.   Tell Mandy again how very sorry I am.

My response then was:  

Flirting is fun and harmless...and it should have been safe. Mandy says, "Ewww.."   Adult men know the boundaries and do not over step them the way you did. Mandy has known you and trusted you since she was eleven years old. You betrayed her trust by systematically pushing the boundaries, kissing her on the mouth for longer and longer period of times, then pushing your tongue into her mouth,  pinching her breasts at that Aikido seminar and fondling her breasts when you took her to your house between the seminar and the party instead of bringing her home.    What could you have been thinking?  You are fifty years old. She was sixteen when you started this crap.   You are too smart to not know what you were doing. I am disturbed by many of the comments you made to her, like "You smell freakishly like a woman" or using the trigger word "pleasure" when you are hypnotizing her....and turning to her and whispering "pleasure" at odd times makes my skin crawl.    Unfortunately anything you have said or done now looks suspicious.. Tabitha of course knows all about this and no one this family wants anything to do with you.    I am sorry that I trusted you with my children.  I feel sick to my stomach that I trusted you. I am glad she finally told me before I let her go to Florida with you.   Stay away from my children.   I would advise you as someone who once loved and trusted you to get some professional help before you find yourself in prison.   Do not contact us again or I will get a restraining order.   Stay away from my children.  

I then made a phone call to our mutual sensei who is also an attorney  Later that night more stuff came out. I then wrote    

The more I talk to my girls, the more apparent it is that they are going to need counseling, and I'll be damned if we are going to pay for it. Mandy is having nightmares, and Tabby feels so betrayed and scared of adult men she is afraid to open the door.  She is freaked out by the knowledge that he has a key to our house.   I want The Molester to pay for counseling for my children. I believe we can get it paid for through his homeowner's insurance.  If you can help us with this as an attorney, that would be very appreciated, but I understand if you feel a conflict of interest since you know all of us and The Molester was on the Board.   The more Mandy tells me, the more upset I get.  She says she is feeling weird when her boyfriend or her father touches her.    I am not going to sweep this under a rug.   She said in the beginning she tolerated his hugs and kisses because she felt sorry for him, that she knows he was a lonely old man. She felt sorry when he kept telling her that she was his best friend.    love, Kas  

  

The classic sexual preditor response "she flirted with me"
I own a gun!
Comment from csandhollow - 10/28/05 11:59 PM

  

There are free groups out there for people that suffer from things like this too, because I think it might be quite diffcult to get him to pay, I have had someone close to me try to do the same thing and it did not work out favorably for them.
Comment from sugar1337 - 10/28/05 9:45 PM

  

Oh my... How could he just "Sweep it under the rug"
and leave you out in the cold like that??

I guess you are right... I guess you find out who your
true friends are in a situation like this.

(((Hugs)))
~Jennifer
Comment from perkysgrl - 10/28/05 11:31 AM

  

Of course she never flirted with him. That is his excuse for his inexcusable behavior. He should pay cash for the therapy and let's hope it hurts his wallet. He should pay for both Mandy and Tabby to go, for as long as they need it.

He is sorry all right - sorry he got caught.

Maybe Mandy and Tabby could write letters to him about how they feel - but not send them? Just to get it out and write it down sometimes helps.

xoxo
Comment from suzypwr - 10/27/05 9:57 PM

  

BTW, Mandy says, "EWWW...I never flirted with him!!"
Comment from hestiahomeschool - 10/27/05 6:14 PM

 

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• #6 Comment from my78novata 
  11/4/05 11:44 AM | Permalink

  OH man what you have been goingthru and all that has happend and to think the way some people are acting its horrendous
• #5 Comment from csandhollow 
  10/28/05 11:59 PM | Permalink

  The classic sexual preditor response "she flirted with me"
  I own a gun!
• #4 Comment from sugar1337 
  10/28/05 9:45 PM | Permalink

  There are free groups out there for people that suffer from things like this too, because I think it might be quite diffcult to get him to pay, I have had someone close to me try to do the same thing and it did not work out favorably for them.
• #3 Comment from perkysgrl 
  10/28/05 11:31 AM | Permalink

  Oh my... How could he just "Sweep it under the rug"
  and leave you out in the cold like that??
  
  I guess you are right... I guess you find out who your
  true friends are in a situation like this.
  
  (((Hugs)))
  ~Jennifer
• #2 Comment from suzypwr 
  10/27/05 9:57 PM | Permalink

  Of course she never flirted with him. That is his excuse for his inexcusable behavior. He should pay cash for the therapy and let's hope it hurts his wallet. He should pay for both Mandy and Tabby to go, for as long as they need it.
  
  He is sorry all right - sorry he got caught.
  
  Maybe Mandy and Tabby could write letters to him about how they feel - but not send them? Just to get it out and write it down sometimes helps.
  
  xoxo