on the outside

I've been sick, again, so tired of being sick. Last night I put the kids to bed and since my husband was working I decided to lay on the couch for a bit. We have a leather sectional and for some reason there is just no way I can get comfortable on that thing. I do like the look of it, without the claw marks on the sides from the cats, but I really miss our old furniture.

Wow, I never thought I'd say that.

I've always wanted a leather sectional so when the chance came up we took it. The kids are older so we figured, why not? I never imagined in a million years that I would miss sinking into those big cushions so much.

Old couch versus Leather couch = Big Difference

Anyhoo, I ended up going up to bed instead since I couldn't get comfy. The leather always makes me cold so I have to put a blanket down first, then I need a pillow, and everything always slides around. Better off just going to bed, at least I know I'll be comfortable.

I didn't get much sleep but I do feel a little better. Tomorrow I have errands to run.

If you want the original couch story, about my last couch, thats in my very first aol journal. The first couch entry is here, and the second is here.

Have a great night!

jfourb at 6:36:28 PM EDT Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 1 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

Welcome! Today's theme for me is Changes.

This whole ordeal with the kittens has consumed me and I've decided to put it aside. I can't think of it anymore. They have good homes and they are loved, so why am I sad? I can see them whenever I want to! So I need to put it aside, not think of it if that is the case, and find other things to occupy my mind.

              

So I've spent the past few cold days making mental lists. And now I'm making some changes!

I'm changing the way I eat, because honestly I feel like crap. No more of that. I know how to eat right and thats what I'm going to do. Just as soon as I go shopping this weekend.

I really need to change my sleeping habits. I can't sleep at night so I sleep mostly during the day while the kids are in school. Somehow that has to change for a few different reasons. I'm hoping if I can start being up more during the day I can do some walking while the kids are still in school, maybe some bike riding. But first thing first, changing my sleeping habits.

I need to be stricter with the kids. Seriously they run all over me and by the evening I'm wiped out. Sometimes all three of them are going at once and I can feel my head spin. Time to get some order. Actually I put this in action a few days ago, and there was some grounding. One of the big problems is at night they call me upstairs no less than 20 times, up and down up and down, for little things that could have been said at any point during the day. Just excuses to stay up, excuses to see how far they can get with me, maybe? So enough of that. I've laid down some rules, last night was a little better but still. I know I never would have gotten away with this sort of thing. I am way too lenient, and I am the one that pays for it, so it needs to stop.

There are a few more changes happening, big ones, but I'm saving those until I know all the details. I'm super excited!  This is all some really big stuff for me and I'm pretty excited to see it all go into motion. This is going to be one big busy summer!

Have a great day!

jfourb at 2:25:51 PM EDT Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 5 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

Today's theme is Mirror Image. I'm going to try and put on a happy face today even though happy is the oposite of what I feel right now. The kitties are slowly leaving me, they have wonderful, loving homes. Still, it doesn't help my grief. But right now my happy face is on.

         

Today was a half day of school and we had parent teacher conferences. Not much new there, same old, same old. The class got a new ginea pig recently so we got to see him. So cute, looks like one of our kitties, all browns and blacks and tan and white. Just a cutie. That was in the fourth grade classroom. My second grader did not need a conference so we just skipped home and relaxed after that. Nice quiet afternoon.

         

Yesterday was a beautiful day, I got some gardening done. We had gone to Lowes and picked up only a few plants for my back garden. A few because it doesn't get any sun so I needed to find plants that required little to no sunlight. After planting them I can see how much room I have left so now I can go back and get some more. Thats going to have to wait though because today is cold and windy, raining. Supposed to stay this way for most of the week, possibly with some snow mixed in there. Where did the spring go? That was fast! lol

         

The weekend went by rather quickly, we didn't do much. The kids just played outside and I got the house cleaned up spotless. I want to get started on the basement which is going to take the longest because we have a lot piled up. I need to pick up a box of garbage bags and then the basement is going to be where I'll be spending most of my time. But then when its done its done! We can have the central air put in and we'll be set for the summer.

         

This weeks going to go slow for me, I really need to find something, anything to keep my mind occupied. The loss of my kitties has me so devestated, even though I know its meant to be, its for the best. I had so hoped I could keep just one. But I need to remember what is best for them, and keep my emotions out of it.

Hope everyone has a wonderful week! I'm planning on getting back to journals this week after I cheer up a bit. I welcome any words of encouragement!

 

jfourb at 4:08:05 PM EDT Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 5 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

It's been hard staying away, but when I don't have anything good to talk about, when there is nothing happy going on, then I'd just rather not say anything. I always remember the bad stuff, its the good stuff I want to remember.

So one of the kittens went to a new home, one of my daughters friends took her. She's doing very well there, they have a dog and the two are getting on pretty good. That leaves me with three. The one with the broken tail isn't doing so good. We had to talk with the kids about her yesterday, its time we had something done with her. We can't provide her with the amout of care she needs and last night it became obvious that she has an infection. Tomorrow we'll be taking her to someone that can help her, hopefully save her. Honestly I don't have high hopes, I've always had this bad feeling about her outcome, but nonetheless I'm hoping things work out. We're going to miss her so very much.

Its been warm, summery weather the past week and its been so beautiful. Its so nice to see all the kids out playing and not in the house watching tv! I was always outside not in the house so I'm always trying to get them out, but now there are so many new things out thats just the way it is.

Not much else going on, I've been spending my nights trying to clear up the dvr, its all filled up with CSI so thats about all I've been watching, I'm starting to get sick of watching that and nothing else.

I'm off to take a shower and wait for the kiddos to get home so we can take one of the cats to the vet.

Have a great day!

jfourb at 12:50:19 PM EDT Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 5 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

Dan over at Slapinions 'tagged' me earlier this week and its taken me this long to get moving on it.

The rules are:
1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
3. At the end of the post, the player then tags 5 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they’ve been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

1) What was I doing 10 yrs ago?

I had just had my second son and I was staying in my in-laws attic. We only stayed there for about a year and a half, and it was really nice. The attic was huge so that the boys had a section where they slept, we had our section, and we had another section with a couch and tv, a refridge it was a little studio apt. We were just saving money and enjoying our family. The best thing about staying with the in-laws was that we got to see all the neices and nephews all the time, my husbands sisters and brother because everyone goes to mom and dads! Once we moved out we didn't see everyone so much.

2) What are 5 things on my to-do list for today (not in any particular order):

Make dinner, watch a movie with the kids (not sure which one yet), change the litter boxes, take some pics of the kittens, wash dishes

3) Snacks I enjoy:

Chocolate, salsa (or taco dip) and chips, twinkies... gosh I think thats about it I'm not much of a snack person more of a meal person

4) Things I would do if I were a billionaire:

 Pay off all my bills. Buy a car. Build or buy a house but go house shopping first. Go back to school. Clothes shop. Furniture shop. Start up another company, maybe restaurant or novelty shop. Open ahair salon for my mom with a small bookstore inside, or a large one inside and a coffee shop with lots of cookies and goodies. Start a non-profit organization for women with children who lose their significant other and need help. Need help picking up their life, need help going after them for support, need help with whatever.  

5) Five of my bad habits:

I like to sleep. A lot.

I hate doing dishes and I'll do anything I can to get out of it.

Lately I've been sleeping through the phone ringing and I need to get up and answer it since its for work.

I almost never put the laundry away as soon as its out of the dryer. Usually it ends up in a pile somewhere or is folded in the basket for a few days until I get sick of looking at it then I put it away.

6) 5 places I have lived:

In a house with my parents. My first apartment with my husband. My in-laws attic for a short time. Since then we've lived in a few different duplexes

7) 5 jobs I have had:

Burger King, dough maker for Little Ceasars inside KMart, Toys R Us, dispatcher and business owner.

     5 peeps I wanna know more about:

Everyone! If anyone plays this please leave a link and let me know

jfourb at 5:40:15 PM EDT Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 7 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

Another short update since I have more facts now. My neighbor was 20 yrs old, his birthday was only about a week away and he would have been 21. His friends went to a lacrosse game, not a soccer game as I had thought.

My heart is still so heavy. Now, I am so thankful that the path of the slug went out of the house. If he had been turned it would have gone right through my childrens bedrooms. Since I didn't hear the blast, he could have killed my kids too and I never would have known. Just thinking of this takes my breath away. Still I can't help being thankful that it didn't happen.

The kittens are over seven weeks old now and I still have all four of them. They spend the night running around, jumping on the beds and playing with each other. They spend the daytime climbing me and playing with each other. I'm sure they think my legs are trees they way they all try to climb me at once. So next week we're going to start giving them to the new homes and I think its going to be so hard, but has to be done. I can't believe how much cat food I'm going through, there is no way I can keep this up.

 

        

We've had mostly a really nice week here sunny and warm, except yesterday and today with rain and clouds. Today its pretty cold out I'm thinking of turning up the heat a bit to take the chill out of the air. I'm really looking forward to the warm weather so I can do some planting. We did start some yard work, my husband in the front and me in the back, but I was raking the leaves and I started to get worried I would find the slug under all the leaves... so after 15 minutes that was it. I had the kids running around me so I took them out front and figure I'll finish that when everyone isn't running around. Hopefully once they get the hole fixed in the siding it will be easier to be in the yard.

Well I'm off to find some lunch before the kiddos get home. Thanks so much to Dan for spotlighting me as he's guest editor this week at Magic Smoke !

Have a great day!

jfourb at 1:47:55 PM EDT Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 6 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

                

I only have a few short minutes to update, I have tons of paperwork to do and less than an hour to get it finished. One of my friends stopped over tonight to look at the kittens and I'm so happy she's going to be taking one in a few weeks. We've known each other a long time and I know she will love it and take wonderful care of it. Plus we can visit anytime we want. Bonus!

Last night my neighbor next door took his life, he was only 21-22. I didn't really know him, besides for when his cat kept coming into our basement and he had to come pick him up. The kids next door are all really nice, responsible young adults. This is all such a shock. He bought a shotgun and shot himself while his friends were out at a soccer game, the slug went right through the wall of the house, hit the windshield of our van and from there we don't know, it can't be found. Thankfully no one was hurt. His bedroom shares a wall with my daughters, and if he had been turned only a foot in another direction that slug would have gone right through my daughters bedroom, then through my boys bedroom. I am so thankful no one else was hurt!!! I keep thinking 'that could have been my child' and wow... not a situation you ever want to be faced with. We're hoping to go to the wake and pay our respects, but nothing has been said about it yet, it hasn't been in the paper. The family has my prayers

Today was a beautiful day, weather-wise. I've been looking around it seems since we moved I somehow lost my big pot of lilies and I wanted to get them on the porch. They were here when we first moved in but now I cannot find them. Tomorrow I'll be looking.

Hope everyone (or if anyone is reading this) had a great weekend! Monday's always come too fast!!!

jfourb at 11:13:33 PM EDT Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 6 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

A terrible tragedy. I live in a duplex and just next door to me one of my neighbors, a young college boy, took his own life just a few hours ago.

Please say prayers for his family and friends, please keep them in your thoughts. They are devastated. Firsthand I have seen how much sadness and devastation this has caused and my heart is breaking for them.

His cat is missing now, we've searched all over for his beloved cat. Please pray for the Elliott's safe return. Not only is he missing but he also lost his best friend tonight.

 

jfourb at 2:34:17 AM EDT Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 4 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

                                            

I keep trying to make an entry but my computer keeps shutting off on me. Its driving me nuts, it happens all day long!

This has been a good week. My daughter is having her very first sleepover so her little friend is over. Doing girly-girl things. I was talking to the mom and she was telling me her boyfriend down the street from me his cat had kittens too, and his kittens look exactly like mine! I think they have the same father. We don't know who the 'tomcat' is, but he sure is getting a lot of action from the females around here!

My younger son came home today, the boys like playing down the street they all play street hockey. Well, one of the mom's walked him home, he had gotten dirt and rocks in his eyes. We've been flushing them out, but he said he can still feel pebbles behind his eyes. I'm thinking he's going to the emergency room. When it comes to the eyes I always get real worried. When I was pregnant with my oldest, about 8 months, I got some powder laundry soap in my eye and it formed a big blister over the front of my eye. I had to go to the ER and they had me wear a patch on my eye for over a week, then I had drops to put in it. Scary stuff when it comes to the eyes.

Tomorrow is supposed to be a beautiful day, somewhere in the 60's. We're going to head outside and do a little clean up of the yard. I'm so eager to get gardening. Gonna plant a bunch of sunflowers over the next few days and get those started, I always love having them, love when they bloom. Of course I don't actually like the sunflower itself. Strange huh? Why, you ask? Well, my husbands ex-girlfriend had a tattoo of a sunflower on her hip. That kind of ruined it for sunflowers for me. Of course she had to show it to me too. Just thinking of it gives me the heebie-jeebies. So not much of a sunflower person but I do love to plant them, you just won't find any sunflower towels or anything in my home.

Tomorrow one of my friends is supposed to come over and look at the kittens. I'm so excited. I think she's going to fall in love. I already know she wants one, but she still has to pick. I already have a bet on the one I think she's going to like. We're going to be holding on to it for a few more weeks for her since she just bought a house and she'll be taking it when she moves in, but I don't mind since I really don't want to part with them anyway. It makes me really happy that she is taking one, I know she will take great care of it.

So I'm off to go get the girls settled in they're going to watch the chipmunks movie and have some popcorn. I think they are going to have a fun girl night, they keep telling me they are telling secrets. Shhhhhhhh!

jfourb at 9:57:40 PM EDT Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 2 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

               

Wow, for some reason today I am in such a bad mood. I'm snapping and growling at everyone today. I hate feeling like this, and especially not knowing why I feel like this.

The boys went down the street and played hockey for most of the day, and my husband took my daughter to his parents house for a few hours. I actually had the house to myself for awhile and all I did was sit around and grumble to myself. Took a bath tonight hoping that would get me out of this funk, but I'm still snarling at everyone.

The anniversary of my Grandma's death just recently passed, so I think that is bothering me. I miss her so much.

Plus knowing the kittens will be leaving us soon has me upset.

I think a combo of these two things may be lingering in the back of my mind, helping to cause my mood. But usually this sort of thing doesn't get me this moody. Could be the weather that keeps changing.

I have no idea. I think I need a good night of sleep. Tonight I'm not eating ANYTHING before bed, I need to sleep and not have all these crazy dreams.

I think tomorrow is going to be a wonderful day.

                    

jfourb at 10:24:31 PM EDT Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 1 comments: Show Recent | Add your own