Joe Biker

Joe Biker now "Out Of True"...the best bike blog ever

Tue, 30 Sep 2008 18:24:01 GMT

Joe Biker has moved to "The Best Bike Blog Ever" on Blogger, aka Blogspot and is now called "Out Of True." Clever, ain't it? Click the big picture link now. Stuff it in your jersey pocket. Set it as a favorite on your browser. Over the next month, we'll work on moving the photos, videos and articles over. Thanks for reading and we'll talk to you there. AOL is closing it's Journals feature and this blog will likely be gone by October 31st, 2008. The cool thing is that Blogger has better formatting features, an open comments format and other goodies that AOL couldn't compete with.

Here's the RSS feed if you use a reader: http://thebestbikeblogever.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default

Tags: Joe, Biker, Moved, new, location, out, of true, the, best, bike, blog, ever, blogger, blogspot, AOL,

Angels in Spandex-Lunken/Downtown Cinti Bike Path

Tue, 23 Sep 2008 15:12:40 GMT

We’re $4 million dollars away from getting the Lunken to downtown bike path completed. I don’t have that kind of jack, jack, but I’ll surely sell some old bike parts to do my part. However, $4 million is still a lot of used derailuers on Ebay. According to a recent story on Cincinnati.com, local, state and federal funding will cover all but $4 million of the estimated $17-18 million dollars to make your cruise from the eastside to downtown Cincinnati a pleasure as early as spring of 2010.

Since the RR tracks sit mostly above Riverside Drive, the view will be even better than from the road. Imagine not having to watch your back for crazy drivers that think the mostly residential Riverside Drive, with a posted speed limit of 35mph, is the faster alternative to Columbia Parkway. Suddenly some of those older East End houses are looking like a cool place to live, if you can’t swallow the price tag of the newer row houses and condos. All of a sudden Oakley and Hyde Park residents, who might ride to downtown via braving Madison to Gilbert, might consider the safer route of Delta to the bike path. With Columbia Square on the way, and a rumored Brueggers and Chipotle as tenants to go along with Starbucks across the street, Columbia Tusculum could be a real hub of fun for the path’s users as much as Loveland is to their stretch of the Little Miami Path.

The non-profit group, Ohio River Way, which sponsors Paddlefest, will begin a fundraising campaign to raise the $4 million dollars privately, according to Rick Greiwe, co-chairman of Ohio River Way in an online article. Cheers to those guys for spearheading the effort. Amazing that a group with its roots in paddle sports is getting it done. The least we can do is rally the cycling community behind them. Most of the money is there, $13-14 million in the bank so to speak. Just need $4 million more.

Here’s an excerpt from the story:

The route has been set. The kinks appear to have been worked out in the lease agreement with Southwest Ohio Regional Transit Authority to use the abandoned railroad tracks, which SORTA owns. Whether the project moves toward construction in the next year or two or loses the air out of its tires depends on money.

Here’s a little local knowledge of those tracks. They are used maybe…maybe twice a month. One train is the little tourist train that parks at the Montgomery Inn boathouse from time to time and does a little sight seeing trip to the east side of town. The other train comes by maybe once a month, usually 3 cars which roll toward downtown and come right back a few hours later. Sometimes I just think that’s CSX way of telling SORTA that the tracks are being used. The third train is the Circus train that rolls into town once a year. There are 2 sets of tracks that run from Lunken to within about a mile or two of downtown. Closer to Friendship Park, there are 3 sets. I would imagine this temporary path would lie atop one set of tracks. The set that’s more North is the one that isn’t used and, around our house anyway, is overgrown and littered with brush and debris.

I’ll admit. I have a vested interest in seeing this happen, beyond just being a cycling enthusiast. My house lies across the street from those rarely used railroad tracks. I could have a bike path literally in my front yard. Yeah. Uh huh. Doing the cabbage patch happy dance right now. Where the tracks run along side Walworth Avenue, there’s actually a nice little park area with stone benches and trees that flower in the spring. What a perfect spot to rest your legs. When completed, I could ride all the way to Great American Ballpark and, aside from crossing side streets, not have to set rubber to a single road. If the link from Lunken to Newtown gets completed, there’d be a bike path from my garage to Yellow Springs and beyond. I think I just heard the sound of tinkling bells and a chorus of angels in spandex.

It’s the fall of 2008 now. Next year at this time, there could be brush being cleared and gravel being panked down on the six or so mile stretch of railroad tracks between Lunken and downtown. 18 months from now, we could be riding it.

If you’ve ever ridden on Riverside Drive (aka old Eastern), met a group ride at the Purple Bridge or Lunken because you didn’t want to drive on Eastern, or fantasize about how cool it would be to enjoy a safe and scenic ride from your Eastside home to downtown, or park at Columbia Square for an out-and-back ride to downtown capped off with a lunch or Coffee on the square, do yourself a favor and visit Ohio River Way’s website, make a donation or offer up your support via email to someone on the contact list.

Tags: Ohio, River, Way, Lunken, downtown, Cinti, Cincinnati, Bike, Path, Sorta, tempoarary, permanent, Little, Miami, railroad, tracks,

Rock the Cycling Sock

Fri, 19 Sep 2008 16:33:53 GMT

Maybe this 40 year old cyclist is a trendsetter, or maybe I’ve just crossed the threshold of youth and I’m so out of touch that I’ve lost my fashion marbles. But, I really think these Sock Guy cycling socks look quite trendy with my work clothes today. They’re black with a brown star, so if your pants rise up a bit and someone catches a glimpse more than ankle high, ka-pow! I knock them out with my cool cycling-slash-work socks.

We had a blackout of sorts in the Cincinnati area this past week when the winds from Hurricane Ike blew threw. As of today, the 6th day after the storm, there are still around 80 thousand homes and businesses without power. I had planned on doing some laundry after the Loveland OVCX series cyclocross race on Sunday, but with no power, no laundry. Of course, even though our power came back on Monday night, I still use that as excuse to why I haven’t washed the heap of clothes in the bedroom and instead dipped into the cycling socks drawer for something to wear to work. Now, looking at my styling socks, I’m wondering if there are other socks in that drawer that I could wear to work.

I could be on the cusp of a whole new category of work socks. Normally men wear two colors of socks to work, black or brown. Alas! I have discovered something new…the Ralph Marlin Grateful Dead Fish Tie of the at work sock world. The tall-crew socks seem to do the trick. You can’t rock regular cycling ankle huggers at work. So, I went on the Sock Guy website and tried to find a few other styles of cycling socks you could rock at work.

Here we have the “Money” cycling sock, perfect for the sales staff. Put your feet up on the boss’ desk and ask for a raise or an increase in commission percentage while you flash these in their face.

Here’s the “King” cycling sock, which are quite effective when you need to lay down the law with your subordinates.

And for the riff-raff of the company, like myself, here’s a stylish racing stripe to impress your co-workers with at happy hour when you dazzle them with conversation about your last cyclocross race.

Tags: cycling, socks, work, wearing, fashion, trends, bike, racing, foot, wear, sock, guy

Crosso Trado

Thu, 18 Sep 2008 14:08:14 GMT

I used to be a substitute radio host for a program called “Radio Tradio” on WTOQ AM in Platteville, Wisconsin. This was my first “career job” working part-time at the station while I went to UW for broadcasting. From time to time, instead of doing the night or overnight shift like most people do in their first radio jobs, I got called up to the big league of the afternoon shift when the regular guy got sick or went on vacation. On Friday’s from six to seven, after the top of the hour newscast, we rolled into the Radio Tradio program. We’d open the phone lines and people would call in with priceless valuable crap they wanted to get rid of, a radio flea market swap meet of sorts. “Mildred of Cuba City has two oak end tables, and is looking for a cookie jar.” As the host, I did my best to keep track of who had what and their phone number. If you wanted end tables, I’d hook you up with Mildred in Cuba City. Or, maybe you were listening, realized you have an extra cookie jar in your basement in Galena, so you’d call in and hook Mildred up. We’d get her back on the air and she’d gush all over the radio about how her grand kids broke the old cookie jar and how happy they’d be over the weekend with cookies on the counter. Radio gold! In retrospect, it really said a lot about the community around Platteville, WI. There was a lot of trust there. Nowadays, you don’t give your phone number and more or less invite strangers to your house to pick up end tables without a background check and a 5-day waiting period. The reason I bring up this history of broadcasting, is that Radio Tradio is very much like the trading of bike parts that goes on around cyclocross season.

This type of trading parts rarely takes place with road or mountain bike racing. With those types of races, you only have one bike and it’s usually the best you can afford. However, with cyclocross, your cross bike is probably the least expensive of your race bikes. You may even have a 2nd cross bike, a pit bike, that’s even of lesser quality. Cross bikes inevitably get the hand-me-downs from your other bikes. When you get new road wheels, the old ones go to your cross bike. When you get new mountain bike brakes, the old 1995 LX Canti's go on your cross bike. After a while, you start accumulating decent old components that don’t have a home on a bike but, like coffee stained oak end tables, you can’t seem to part with them. These parts are golden in the world of cyclocross parts trading.

Just this past week a friend was building up a new frame and the best front derailuer he could muster up was a 9sp Shimano 105 with a few years on it. It worked with his 10sp cassette, but wasn’t’ in harmony. So, he asked around. I happened to have a relatively new 10sp Ultegra that I stripped off my road bike when I got Sram Red earlier in the year. Since, both of my CX bikes are single ring up front, it was just sitting in a big blue plastic parts bin under the workbench in the garage shop along with an 8sp XT mountain bike cassette and a set of barely used blue Lizard Skin grips. I wasn’t using it nor do I have any plans for putting double rings on my CX bikes. So, I offered it up. Normally, I don’t ask for anything in return, but a 10sp Shimano Ultegra Front Derailuer less than a year old is worth a little more than LX cantilever brakes from 1995. Just like Mildred’s oak end tables are probably worth a little more than a piece of plywood countersunk into an old milk crate. So, I said, if you got anything I could use, let me know. He offered up a set of older Avid Shorty cantilever brakes. Since I actually do have 1995 LX canti’s on my pit bike, 3 year old Shorties are an upgrade. So, I took him up on the offer. No doubt there’s someone out there who could use a set of 1995 LX cantilevers. When I run into them, the cycle of Crosso Trado will continue.

Tags: Cyclocross, cross, CX, parts, trade, radio, tradio, WTOQ, platteville, bike, racing, component, swap, wisconsin, flea market

Hurricane Ike-clocross

Mon, 15 Sep 2008 13:50:49 GMT

The winds did some house cleaning on the dead tree limbs, took that filthy layer of dirt off the top of the baseball fields, and dumped the whole lot into the tangled caution tape of the first OVCX cyclocross race of the season in Loveland Ohio. While the power went out to over a half a million customers, it was game on for cross. However, it was the power in the legs that was flickering for many riders as they battled the 55mph average headwind on the pavement stretch in the Masters and 1/2/3 races, which were underway when Hurricane Ike made his presence known in Cincinnati.

If there was an ounce of real blogger blood in my veins, I would’ve broke out the cell phone video camera to capture the comical carnage, but all I could do was to try to keep my back to the wind, hold on to my hat and half full can of Diet Coke, and keep ringing the cowbell for teammates in the Elite 1/2/3 race. Race organizers were frantically busy retying caution tape, trying to stake down tents and running full boar around the park chasing pages of results and one-day license entries as they blew away from the registration area. The poor PA announcer guy up on the hill by the ball fields was like a CNN reporter on the Gulf Coast as the wind whipped rocks and debris against his shins. He stuck it out like a pro. Even if the PA system was rather quiet and obviously under powered, he didn’t miss a beat describing the race leaders on the backside of the course. At the height of the wind, I could hear him barking something about Katie Compton being preregistered for the upcoming 3-day UCI weekend in Cincinnati. I don’t know who he was, but if the position is open, this is the type of guy you want announcing Nationals in the middle of a Kansas City snowstorm in December.

The winds didn’t really whip up till midway through the Masters 1/2/3 race, but you couldn’t ignore it as the caution tape made that hollow wicka wicka wicka ripping noise in chorus across the course. Being able to grab a wheel going into the pavement stretch was more important than ever. The lucky few who were able to stick together in little groups extended their lead on the pavement to the poor saps behind left flat-backed and hiding behind their handlebars as they drove their legs through the driving wind. Those like me who realized the disparity of the situation and hunkered down low and aero were able to pick off riders who tried to power through while still riding on the tops. While I wasn’t as aggressive at the start as I knew I could be, I picked off 3-4 riders during the race and finished guessing mid-pack. When I crossed the finish line, I pulled up next to some BioWheels teammates and one pointed out that I was bleeding on my shin. I didn’t wreck, it was wind damage. I remember getting sand blasted near the end of the pavement stretch and no doubt one sharp little rock drew some blood.

For those that evacuated, you missed an exciting 1/2/3 race. Nearly 10 well matched riders took control on the first lap, with at least a 30 metergap to the following eight. From there, some riders from the chase group managed to make contact while others who went out too hard traded places with them. But, when the 55+mph winds whipped up, it shredded the riders and the caution tape, reducing the 1/2/3 race to pairs and solo riders. I stuck around long enough to cheer the last BioWheels rider across the finish line and then headed for higher ground myself. My wife had called and said the power was out and some big tree limbs down in our backyard near downtown Cincinnati. Having the power out at the house was nearly a welcome situation after a race. Since there wasn’t much we could do, I spent the night on the couch recovering with a battery powered Coleman lantern and a new book called “Off The Deep End” about a Masters aged swimmer trying to qualify for the Olympics which is turning out to be pretty good.

More Photos: From Karen and Jeff and Tom

Results: Here

Joe Biker Note: Thanks for reading! Within the first 24 hours of this post, there were over 120 views. Gotta love CX season.

Tags: hurricane, ike, cyclocross, cx, cross, ovcx, loveland, race, wind, photos, image, picture, ohio, valley, cyclo, bike, damage

Tags: book, off the deep end,

Weather Watchers and Race Predictors

Thu, 11 Sep 2008 13:25:55 GMT

McShane’s gonna take it! We’ll see. This is the Crossresults.com race order finish prediction of the OVCX Race #1 this weekend, based on Bikereg.com confirmed rider entries as of 9/11/08 at 9am.

Cat 1/2/3 Men Masters 35+/45+	Points
Michael McShane	244.82
Frederick Rose	286.31
Morgan Webb	288.77
Keith Hutton	328.29
Rick Lyons	330.47
Mark Strecker	343.78
James Turner	350.74
Bill Kennedy	468.28
Harry Wicks	486.84
Doug Hamilton	487.68
Todd Turner	Unknown
Mark Hooton	Unknown

Like having a bookie’s line on cyclocross races, The Cross Results website race predictor is up and running. It’s pretty cool, you just plug in the URL of the Bike Reg committed rider page and it generates a finish prediction based on past results. Brilliant! Admit it. If you plan on racing Sunday and you haven’t registered yet, chances are the reason is that you’re like me, a Masters aged racer, and undecided as to which race to enter and are telling everyone that you're keeping an eye on the weather forecast. Uh huh. Whatever. They nicknamed it The Competition Stalker for a reason. Cuz there's entry holdouts stalking the competition. If anything, it’s a great way to “stay focused on CX” while you’re supposed to be working.

Here’s the link to the page on Crossresults.com

Here’s the link to the OVCX Bike Reg confirmed rider list for the 1st race in Loveland, OH.

Its main flaw, because it works off results of the past 12 months, is that it can’t account for the improvements riders have made since last December. Here it shows Rick Lyons and Keith Hutton beating Mark Strecker in the Cat 1/2/3 Masters 35/45+. While I haven’t seen Keith or Rick ride yet this year, let it be known Strecker is on fire and has been putting gaps into many of Cincinnati’s ½ crossers at Wednesday night practices.

For a cyclocross rider stuck deciding on which race to enter, it’s a tough decision. You don’t want to be a sandbagger. You don’t want to get lapped either. I repeat. You don’t want to be a sandbagger. My rule of thumb is that if you’ve had 2-3 podium finishes in the lower category race and can finish mid pack in the next hardest race, you should take on the challenge. Then you have to consider the series. Sure you might not be able to snag a payout in the harder race right now, but the series is long, you’ll get faster.

Then it comes down to more personal reasons. As much as you hate to admit it, maybe you’re not as fast as you once were. The last time you were on the Cat 3 podium might have been in 2004. Or was it ’05? Maybe your best finish last year in the lower category was…uh 12th. Maybe you should race the lower category. Bike racing is cyclical. You have you're up and down seasons depending on your job and personal life. Then you look at the payouts. The Masters field pays cash to the top 7. Can you knock on that door this season? Maybe get beat up in the early races in hopes that you'll bag that 7th place down the line. The 3 payout is much more shallow and it’s prizes. Maybe you already have 26 pairs of cycling socks.

Maybe you’ll wait till Friday and keep an eye on the forecast. Weather watcher, yeah right.

Tags: Race, predictor, cyclo, cross, CX, OVCX, Loveland, deciding, which, to, enter, Bikereg.com, crossresults.com

Joe Biker Comeback Video

Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:19:08 GMT

Official Joe Biker Media Release: September 10th, 2008

Hey everybody. There’s been media reports today about a possible return to racing for me. I’m here to tell you that after talks with my family, and two cats that I have decided to return to cyclocross racing this season. The reason is that there might be a chance in hell that Strecker, Bobrow, Noble and Gatch might get a mechanical during the season and open the door for me to snag a piece of that top seven payout. I’ll make it official Sunday at the OVCX race in Loveland. So, take care and remember, more cowbell.

Tags: Joe, Biker, Come, Back, return, cycling, racing, cyclo, cross, lance, armstrong, bike, pro, video, parody

Lance Comeback Video

Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:24:59 GMT

Tags: Lance, Armstrong, back, return, come, pro, cycling, race, again,

Dear Joe Biker: Cool Helmet Mirrors

Fri, 05 Sep 2008 19:03:53 GMT

Inbox: Joe Biker Blog
From:	DLR
To:	joebiker
Posted:	04 Sep 2008 22:25 GMT
Subject:	Bottle Cap Mirror
I wanted to thank you again for the plug in your blog, I got an order from a shop in Florida that read about them. I want to send you a mirror of your choice.

There’s nothing better about blogging than actually having readers, except maybe the swag. Thanks to the shop in FLA for reading. Hopefully cyclists in Florida will see those hurricanes coming with your new helmet mirrors. Now that I have some swag on the way, maybe it’s time for a Joe Biker photo contest or something....or maybe I should just watch my back with my new Fat Tire Ale bottle cap helmet mirror. Once again, if you'd like to get your own, send an email to VRT64@aol.com Cost is $12.

Tags: bottle, cap, helmet, mirror, cycling, road, biking

Perma Funkadelic

Tue, 02 Sep 2008 15:22:43 GMT

Your friends won’t tell you, but I will, you stink. My high school gym teacher bestowed that wisdom upon me when he reminded us after class to take our stinking school issued shorts and shirts home for mom to wash over the weekend. Apparently some of your gym teachers and mothers let you down. If you’re a cyclist, who I assume you are, for Pete’s sake, wash your stinking kit after you ride. Every time! Damn man, woman, you’re killing us back here on your wheel. You stink. And, while you’re at it, just in case, wipe down that leather saddle too. There, I said it. Either your clothes or your saddle has the perma funk. Both need to be washed today.

I’ve heard reports out there, and I’ve been behind a foul behind a time or two myself this year. I’m not naming names, and the timeliness of this blog has nothing to do with it. The people I rode with over the last week are off the hook. However, there’s a few of you cyclists in Cincinnati that think they can wear their shorts and jersey for more than one ride on a washing. You can’t. You smell. Bad. This must stop. Don’t think because you’re a girl that you’re off the hook. Not so quick missy. Pretty flowers on a jersey don’t mask the stank. The time to wash is neigh. People are starting to talk. There’s a reason why people keep leaving gaps behind your wheel.

Cyclists come from all kinds of backgrounds and financial situations. I understand that I’m blessed to have a washing machine and a laundry room at the ready when I roll back home after a ride. I understand that not everyone can afford to have two or more cycling outfits. Here’s a secret that I’ve used on many a vacation, where I could only pack one kit and had no hotel laundry. Soap and water! It’s brilliant. Use it on your fine leather saddle and your chamois. Any cave dweller can do it.

Locate a nearby sink. If you can’t find one, locate a bucket, bowl, or pothole. Camping? Put a plastic bag in your helmet for a makeshift sink. Fill the reservoir with water. Put some soap in there. Any soap will do, laundry detergent, dish soap, hand soap, bar soap, allthesame. Don’t be stingy. Swash it around a bit and mix the soap with the water. Toss your tainted taint protectors in there. Swash it around a bit more. Get the soapy water all mixed in real good. Drain the soapy water. Fill the bowl or bucket with water again. Rinse the soap out of your clothes. Wring them out. Hang them to dry on a shower rod, clothes hanger, luggage hook in your car or nearby tree. A jersey, short and two socks takes 4 minutes tops. Consider it a good core workout.

Now if your clothes have the super mega mega ultra death funk on them…yeah, you know what I’m taking about, it’s called perma funk. It’s not the latest slap-bass boogie album from Bootsy Collins. It’s the funk that doesn’t go away no matter how much you wash your clothes. Not sure? Do yourself and friends a favor go through ALL your cycling clothes and smell them. If they are what you call “clean,” but still have an odor to them, they got the funk. This usually happens to the jersey you love but refuse to part with because it’s still in good shape. You have two choices. Toss them or try this last resort. If the fabric on the butt is worn out, where riders behind you can see the Grand Canyon and surrounding shrubbery, for goodness sake throw them away. They are done. Even this lastresort cannot save them. Congratulations, you rode hard and long enough to actually wear out a pair of shorts. It happens. If the threads are in good shape, the fabric isn’t worn so thin that your junk is playing peek-a-boo, the chamois is still holding up to the beating from your big smelly ass, and there isn’t a picture of a giant googly eyed tree frog on them, then, and only then, there might be a chance you can save them with Sport Wash. Otherwise, throw away your sweat stained stanky skinsuit.

Sport Wash? What is this? Ah ha. Let me enlighten you o’stinky one. Sport Wash is made by Penguin. It is specifically designed to get the most heinous stench out of workout clothes. Buy yourself a bottle. You’ll find it at your local bike shop, running store, or outdoor store. It's a little pricey, but costs far less than a new pair of shorts or the humiliation of someone actually telling you face-to-face in front of all your riding buddies that you stink. I am not getting any kickbacks for this advertising. I am not doing this for your sake. I am doing this because I can’t stand to ride behind stinky people. Here’s a link, buy some of this crap, wash your soiled chamois in it or be destined to a life of solo riding. Your choice.

Tags: skinky, cycling. clothes, washing, wash,smell, sport, wash, funk