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Sunday, February 11, 2007
February 2007
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Monkey Junkies
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Wednesday Author Interview: Hal Duncan
2/28/07
If You're Spending This Much on a Brownie, You're Officially Insane
2/28/07
Which Month Has 28 Days?
2/27/07
As Long As the Computers Don't Start Writing For Us, I'm Fine
2/27/07
Fun With Alternate History
2/27/07
I hate My Job, And My Coffee Break Isn't Notably Satisfying, Either
2/27/07
Now to Work on My Maniacal Monster Laugh! Bwa Ha Ha Ha Hah!
2/27/07
How Is This Even Possible?
2/26/07
Your Monday Photo Shoot: Fridge Magnets!
2/26/07
Catastrophic Tales of Computer Crankery!
2/26/07
Teaching the Kids About money
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A New Look at Mars
2/26/07
On the Oscars
2/25/07
This is My Excuse For Sleeping 12 Hours a Day
2/25/07
More Fun Than the Oscars Will Be
2/24/07
The Coolest Rainbow Picture You'll See Today
2/24/07
Fun With Tape
2/23/07
From the "Watch before the Cease and Desist Notice Arrives" File
2/23/07
Your Friday Game: Virus 2
2/23/07
The Quest for Autumn
2/23/07
Another Entry for the "When You Have More More Money Than Sense" File
2/23/07
Ahhh, MUCH Better
2/22/07
Weekend Assignment #153: When Computers Attack
2/22/07
Friends in High Places
2/21/07
Deliciously Diggtastic
2/21/07
More Fog and Ice
2/21/07
The Perils of Group Think
2/21/07
Why You Want to Date a Geek
2/21/07
Hey, Want Some Fog?
2/20/07
My Name is Джон Скальци.
2/20/07
The Dark Side of Internet Fame
2/20/07
Perhaps the Best Summation as to Why Stress is Different for Humans
2/20/07
Free Pancakes!
2/20/07
You're a Liar
2/19/07
Your Monday Photo Shoot: Such Great Heights
2/19/07
Cats, Dogs, Captions
2/19/07
My Airline Bill of Rights Would Include All the Honey-Roasted Peanuts I Could Eat!
2/19/07
Kid Monsters, All Grown Up
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A Tradition, Belated
2/18/07
Audio entry
2/17/07
Nuts
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Audio entry
2/16/07
"Loyal" Pets
2/15/07
Weekend Assignment #152: Caption This Photo!
2/15/07
Phoning it In
2/15/07
I Can't Wait to Get the Millard Fillmore Dollar Coin!
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Travel Day
2/15/07
Congratulations Heather and Jason!
2/14/07
How Much Snow We Got Last Night
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Wednesday Author Interview: Joe Hill
2/14/07
The Man Who Fell To Earth... and Lived
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Happy Valentine's Day
2/13/07
Snow Update
2/13/07
Clever Kid
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Cubicle Spouses
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Just the Advice You Need
2/13/07
This One Goes Out to All You Geeks in Love
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Snow Day
2/12/07
Because a Cat's the Only Cat That Knows Where It's At
2/12/07
Your Monday Photo Shoot: On the Phone
2/12/07
The Truth About Valentine's Day
2/12/07
Awesome Buildings, According To You
2/12/07
When Hip Web Sites Try Too Hard
2/12/07
Two Absolutely, Totally Unrelated Things
2/11/07
Exotic Laptoppery
2/11/07
A Story To Cure You Forever of the Desire to Swim in the Amazon
2/10/07
In the Future, Your House Might Be Made of Poo
2/10/07
The Very Latest in Law School Grading Techniques
2/9/07
Definitely the Strangest Damn Thing You'll See Today
2/9/07
Dude, I'll Be Here Until April
2/9/07
Out of Africa
2/9/07
"Of course, what we really need is a vaccine against zombies."
2/9/07
Donny Osmond's Street Cred Has Just Gone Up With the Kids
2/8/07
Weekend Assignment #151: Valentine's Day -- Fun or Forced?
2/8/07
In Your Eyes
2/8/07
The Sweet, Sweet Sound of Cashing In
2/8/07
Note: The Driving 900 Miles in a Diaper Thing? Not as Crazy as it Sounds
2/8/07
Mothra, Now. Mothra is ENTIRELY Plausible.
2/7/07
How Marriage Proposals Get Done, 2007
2/7/07
Of Course, Now The Robbers Will Just Start Cruising the Kid's Room
2/7/07
The Logical End of The Web
2/7/07
You Can Live On It, But It's Not Fun
2/7/07
Snow and Sick Kid Update
2/6/07
Please Note, However, That Stamps Are Not Hard to Come By
2/6/07
The Super Bowl in Three Minutes
2/6/07
Listen to What I Write: An Audio Book From Me
2/6/07
Three Links Which For Some Reason Seem Like They Ought To Be Placed Near Each Other
2/6/07
Sick Kid Alert
2/5/07
Your Monday Photo Shoot: The Eyes Have It!
2/5/07
Hike!
2/5/07
Night Lights
2/5/07
The Only Reason to Watch the Super Bowl if You Weren't From the Midwest
2/5/07
That Would Explain It
2/4/07
I Still Want A Mustang
2/4/07
Just Out of Curiosity...
2/3/07
The Microwave: Not Just For Exploding Eggs Anymore
2/3/07
The Coolest Picture of a Wave You'll See Today
2/3/07
Zeus is Back, and He's Annoyed You've Been Ignoring Him
2/3/07
Gahhhh
2/2/07
The Girl Gave Me Some Fish Sticks and Suddenly Here I Am in Niagra Falls
2/2/07
Now We Know Why Punxsutawney Phil Called For an Early Spring
2/2/07
And Now A Long-Term Forecast From The Most Reliable Rodent Weatherman Ever!
2/1/07
Weekend Assignment #150 (or, CL): Your First Super Bowl
2/1/07
Light Shows
2/1/07
Playing With Vista
2/1/07
Finally, You Can Blame it On Something Other Than Your Propensity to Eat a Case of Twinkies a Day
2/1/07
In Prison, You're Not Supposed to Drink the Soap Either
« February 2007 Archive
Sunday, February 11, 2007
11:38:00 AM EST
Hearing Nothing at the moment

A Story To Cure You Forever of the Desire to Swim in the Amazon


Behold the terror that is... the candirú! It's just a tiny, tiny fish, how harmful can it be? Just you wait. Also, if you're a man, you might want to sit down before reading this article.

I'll stick to my local swimming pool.


Written by johnmscalzi Blog about this entry
This entry has 3 comments: (Add your own)
  • #3 Comment from mysticfairy200 
    2/11/07 6:32 PM | Permalink
    When I read all the other comments I knew I wasn't going to read that little entry of yours.But if it's painful to men and boys then I'm enjoying myself while the men and boys that read it say their feelings about that entry.And at the same time I'm laughing at their wonders of Amazon Forest River pains.Why don't you just go to my journal and read what I write for my journal...I bet you'll think it's dumb...But that's what I do.I write what I dream about in my AOL Journal for everyone to read.I don't even care if the people that read it all think I'm nuts because I don't care what they think...So read my entrys and post what you think of them.
  • #2 Comment from gifdude 
    2/11/07 3:50 PM | Permalink
    Oh heck no.

    I was crossing my legs just reading this story. OUCH!

    I will stay away from the Amazon River as far as I can, thank you.
  • #1 Comment from dpoem 
    2/11/07 2:35 PM | Permalink
    I wonder what would happen if the immovable toothpick fish were to meet the unstoppable kidney stone?  Hmmm...

    By the way, John, thank you ever so much for making me cringe on a Sunday morning.  How about I give you my phone number, and you can call me and tell me the bedtime story about taking a vegetable peeler across the nipples?  

    Seriously, though, I have heard about certain parasites taking that route, but I don't think I've heard about the fish...  with hooks...  on a one-way trip to My-God-Just-Feed-Me-to-the-Crocodile town.  

    -Dan
    http://journals.aol.com/dpoem/TheWisdomofaDistractedMind/