By The Way...

I hope you haven't left yet.

I've heard your audio entries, and I can see this ending up with you not only paying them to fix the leak, but you paying them for the spill-absorbent they'll use when you leak oil on their parking lot.

If you can't fix stuff like that yourself- and don't feel badly, as I can't do so either... I'm paying the mechanic or laying the husband whenever something clicks/whirs/wobbles on my Smurfmobile- hire some scary guy to go into the garage and be like "Who the **** broke my wife's minivan?"  

This should be done in a bellow, by a man who can obviously injure 3-5 of the mechanics, even if they come at him with wrenches. I married that guy, but I'd have no problem at all going down to the local gym and hiring the guy who looked like he was on the most/best steroids if I were still single.

I don't really hang around gyms much, but I bet you could get someone to do it for $20 and lunch... which, as you'll most likely soon find out, is cheap.

If you can get a black guy or a Jew, all the better... any Jiff-E-Lube station manager worth his salt would have sex with cacti before allowing his station to be spoken of in every newspaper in town (and, quite possibly, the nation) as the one where that racially-motivated brawl broke out.

If the garage has some sort of plan in place for dealing with angry customers, the brute never needs to do another thing after the initial bellow... save point at the leaking minivan. After the first bellow, the System takes over... and systems can be manipulated, usually with only a little bit of foresight.

Which, in a nutshell, is why you'll be getting stuck in the purse like the Gay Rapper when you go back there with the leaking minivan. In the future, ALWAYS look under it- wherever they parked it- before you pull out of the station.

I thought it was uncool for guys to admit they have minivans...

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