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Subject: Vote HEADoc for Congress On Nov. 7, 2006
Time: 10:43:00 PM EDT
Author: kheadenmd
Mood: Silly
Music: Hail To The Chief
As your write in candidate for U.S. Congress, for the following issues I promise to:
GENERAL Tell no lies or make promises I know I cannot keep.
THE WAR ON TERROR Let the majority of Americans vote on how to approach the War On Terror and Let the sons and daughters of Senators and Congressmen be equally represented on the battle field. Find Osoma Bin Ladin!
HEALTH CARE Provide a reasonable health insurance plan for all working citizens and their families. The money will come from immediately ending all managed care and returning the savings directly to the consumer. Doctors will offer their own comprehensive plans on a fee for service basis. Patients will save money by engaging in preventive medicine strategies. Patients who engage in high risk behaviors will simply run out of funds and no longer qualify for coverage. Doctors will be expected to do some indigent care, but with my plan the patient who has reached such a status mostly through poor treatment compliance cannot hold anyone else liable. Also, under my plan, generic equivalent medications will be allowed after only five years making the market more consumer friendly and less influenced by corporate greed. I promise to put doctors back in the driver's seat of health care.
WAR ON DRUGS AND THE ECONOMY Conduct a real war on drugs. The crack has got to go. It is ruining it for everybody and his mama. I will order and conduct an all out raid on every coca and poppy plant within the Western Hemisphere. On second thought, I may just decide to legalize all drugs and tax, tax, tax. I will then abolish the IRS and offer free treatment to all the addicts in the country. When they discover they are actually paying for it, I predict they will become pissed and refuse to buy the product. This may take a few decades but in the meantime the American people will receive the greatest tax break in the history of the world. With this plan I expect to balance the budget in approximately four years. In eight years we will have a surplus somewhere in the range of eight trillion dollars. We project that we will be able to buy Iraq at this time.
ENVIRONMENT My plan for the environment will include removal of the toxic arsenic from the drinking supply of this great nation and we will then supplement the water with acceptable levels of haloperadol. This will cut down costs on mental health care and reach those citizens that have never had evaluation because of a false belief of being o.k. The pilot program will be initiated in our own nation's capitol city of Washington D.C.
A CANDIDATE FOR THE COMMON PERSON In conclusion, I seek your vote today because I want to see we the people have a government for the people and by the people that does not screw the people. I am the founder and promoter of the newly found TOTS Party. Tots stands for Tired Of This Shiz. We take a common sense approach to handling issues of the common people. We do not care for the filthy rich and yes we will tax you like we would a thousand dollar a day crack head. And the good thing is there is nothing you can do about it since you only make up 5% of the population. We do not care for the average corporation for we have seen the disloyalty shown to Americans who have had their jobs shipped away after years of service. We have watched you put your profits in foreign banks and pay no income taxes for year after year. Therefore, to every greedy corporation, we will once again tax, tax, tax, and tax. Our party stands for the common man. So if you are a common American and are TOTS please come on out to the polls early on Tuesday, November 7th, and cast your write in vote for HEADoc for United States Congress. And bring a friend.
Disclaimer: I'm The HEADoc and I approve this message
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You got my vote!!!!!!!! Where do I send the campaign contribution?
10/12/06 10:49 PM