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Subject: God in the waiting room
Time: 1:53:00 AM EDT
Author: kpchprather4
Finally back and what a trip. It is somewhat of a blur, but we just got back from MD Anderson. After my last post I had an hour and a half sleep, drove to Houston, arrived at the hospital at 6:40 a.m. and we left around 6:40 p.m that night for a quick meal and then to a hotel.
Tuesday was a very long day filled with tests and more tests...and waiting. Lots of waiting. In between there were conversations with specialists and just about the greatest doctor I know...he spent at least an hour with us going over brain scans (to say that we humans are incredibly and wonderfully made is such an understatemen!t) and talking to us about NF type 1 and where we are at this time with our daughter...(doing good!) and some of the secondary things that NF kids deal with and how we can process things and help her in those areas...it was fascinating stuff to learn. Hannah did a great job. She's a reslient and determined kid. More importantly, she (and we) have a Great God.
There was 6 hours of testing on Wednesday. A little more dialogue and explanation. Like I said, it was a blur. but in the midst of it all there was God who continued to display His goodness, faithfulness and graciousness. God right there in the stuff of life...God in the waiting room. God in the midst of uncertainties (and this particular trip was one uncertainty after anothel)...but...God was present. Just like He promised. Faithful. Always faithful.
Also in the middle of all of this were people. Namely children and their parents. Most everything we do takes place in the child and adolescent center of the hospital so most of the people we meet are parents and their children. We meet people, hear stories. see things. Amazing things.
There was Daniel. He's 17 years old. When i first saw him sitting in the room with his mom, nothing unusual stood out. He looked like anyone else I've ever met except there was a soul weariness that was quite evident. You could see it in his eyes, the kind of fatigue one would normally associate with someone much older who had expereinced a lot of pain in life...but he is 17.
He was diagnosed with leukemia at age 9. Aggressive treatment began at that time. For over 1/2 of his life...this HAS been his life. He is at this time in remission, but there are the regular trips, as you can imagine, and this young man hasbeenn through the wringer. We spoke mostly to his mom. He preferred silence. There was a certain numbness to his demeanor that spoke of a long life lived over a 17 year period. We talked about God and blessings. His mother seemed to enjoy that. She was vibrant in the midst of it all...a remarkably strong woman. Daniel smiled when i told him he was a real hero in my eyes...that God had truly given him a great blessing. He seemed to like that. Seemed to need that. I was reminded of how we all need encouragement. Especially those who are living in the valleys so to speak.
I can't imagine what his life has been like, to know in some way, ever since he was in 4th grade that there was this thing called "death"-and as he grew in his understanding of it all, to process those things and have them continually hanging over his head, a part of his everyday life. Again, he is just 17.
By the end of the day he was asleep on a couch, worn out from the testing. Always the testing...It doesn't seem to stop. But it is necessary. Important. Because life is important. yes...you see people. Sometimes, when you are paying attention, you see far more than the externals, you catch a glimpse of that person as an individual and in a small way, a glimpse of the journey they have taken. You see, hear and feel.
You see the small Arab girl with a bald head because of her treatments, wearing a face-mask because her immune system is so low that any airborne disease could be very dangerous to her...sitting quietly in the children's play area of the waiting room, working on a puzzle. You wonder how much of this she understands. For this small child, this is what life is like. I wonder if she ever wonders why other children do not have to wear such a mask.
You see a small baby in her anxious mother's arms, same face-mask...and you wonder. You wonder what that mother is thinking. If you look closely you can see a parent who would gladly trade places with her daughter if it were possible, to take the pain away from her, to bear it for her.
You wonder what to say. What to do. You see these children and teenagers in many conditions. Some are in remission. Some are fighting. Some are just discovering what it means to begin this journey.
There are the NF kids-some show little signs outside of the caffe au lait markings on their bodies, some walk around with little and sometimes large fibromas or deformities because the gene that causes NF "goes off" (and you never know when or if it may go off) so you wonder as a parent-will it "go off" on my child? You know you are not supposed to be anxious or worry about tomorrow. So you entrust, as best you can, all to Him-but honestly, in your frailty, you have moments in which you wonder. You see all of these things and you wonder. And this leads you to pray even more.
You definitely pray. You pray becasue you see so much. You pray because you wonder. You pray because you realize the fragile nature of life and you pray because it's simply the right thing to do. It's not the "only" thing left to do-it is the best thing to do. You pray because you believe God still moves mountains, that He still heals. Such contexts tend to remind us just how dependent we are on God. We tend to forget that for some reason.
Today we met a teenage girl and her parents. they were from Jersey. We have something in common because my brother in law is from there. The girl was a beautiful young lady-probably 16 or 17 or so-she looked perfectly healthy. Just as we were beginning to engage her parents and her in conversation she was called out of the waiting room so she could be seen by her doctor. We don't know her story. but she was there...and if you are there you have a story to tell.
So you pray for the family and you pray that God would reveal Himself in their life story. You pray for everyone and their stories. You pray because you believe God is able to work in remarkable ways just as He says He can.
I titled this blog 'God in the waiting room'-and you may be wondering why. Where was the sermon? Where was the incredible miracle? The angelic visitation? Where was God in such a place?
God was there. He wasthere in the prayers of His people. He was there in holy conversation. He was there as Healer, Comforter, Strength.
He was there in Hope. It sounds counterintuitive to say that in such a 'depressing' place, there is such Hope. But there is...profound Hope. There is hope because the work of the Spirit of God is not confined to the four walls of a church, nor to seminary campuses or church retreats...He is always working-and He works in so many places and in so many ways. He works through His people who preach His love through their actions. He works as His people pray. He works because He loves His creation. He is at work because in such places people are seeking Him.
The facility is simply huge. 16,000 employees alone. Add the patients-around some 40-50,000 people in and out daily. It's a city within a city. Everything is there: restaurants...game rooms...libraries, gift shops, Starbucks (as if there would be a place in the U.S. where Starbucks is not) , large, beautiful atriums-a chapel, a meditation room...a computer center...the list goes on.
I went to the meditation room today to pray. It was a wonderfully quiet place, low lit-Christian imagery in the room. It gave me time to pray, reflect...and meditate on just how Good and Amazing our God is. How He had walked with us and was walking with us. how He was present. He was there in a profound way in that room...but He was not confined to that room.
You can encounter God in a lot of amazing places... even in a waiting room. If you are looking. if you are listening. You will see. You will hear. He is present.
And i think this is true of anywhere we go. Maybe the thing is we just don't notice His presence as often as we should. Yes, He will be in services Sunday so do not miss out on the corporate worship experience. God does inhabit the praises of His people. But He's with you now. Don't forget that. No matter where you are.
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6/2/07 7:13 PM