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Feeling Hopeful
SAVING MY SISTER
I only have one sister, and no brothers. My Dad may have wanted boys,
but if he did, he never let it show. He adored his girls and my sister was a little
bit of a tomboy, anyway. I was six years older than she and had been present
at her birth. The doctor was delayed and a neighborhood mid-wife had to do
the delivery at home. So, at six, I knew about labor and childbirth. Instead
of resenting the new baby, it caused me to become very protective of my baby
sister, a trait that continues to this day.
Sister was accident-prone. Situations seemed to seek her out. It was
not at all unusual to have someone come to my classroom and tell me, "Your
little sister is hurt or bleeding (or both). She once turned a china cabinet over
breaking most of the crystal contents and the glass door over her head. That
time she was miraculously able to come out with only scratches. She was not
as lucky on the playground one day, when she came off the slide and fell on a
metal post that had been broken off. The jagged edge cut a triangular gash
between her eyes. I always wondered later in life, when she had a brain tumor
behind her eyes, if somehow those accidents may have been the cause.
Anyway, I told this to illustrate my protective attitude toward my sister.
We never fought, and seldom disagreed. I loved her fiercely and still do. To
be honest, she has proven to be the stronger of the two of us, overcoming
many obstacles to get an education and raise four children. I'm proud of her.
The incident I want to tell about occured after her first two children were
eight and ten. . My daughter was almost seventeen but had never spent a night
away from home, except for the time I was in the hospital getting her brother.
Then , she was only next door at my parents. Unfortunately, not meaning to,
I had passed a couple of my phobias (that I inherited from my mother) on to her.
My mother never liked to be alone. She was terrified of thunderstorms. During
the years that I was growing up, she managed somehow to have someone else
with her besides us children. We lived next door to my grandmother and she often
packed us up and ran to her house if the sky became overcast. She fought these
fears all her adult life and they lessened in later years. I was very sensitive and
picked up on the fears, which I transferred to myself.
When I married at a very young age, I got a wonderful husband. He had
secured a good job but being newer, had to take night shift. I had to stay by my-
self in a lonely apartment while he worked. I was determined to overcome my fear
but I sat many nights staring at the locked door, butcher knife in hand. If you have
never suffered from a nameless terror, you won't understand what I am saying.
My husband moved up in time to day shifts and I could forget those nights alone.
My sister had somehow escaped the fears that my mother and I shared. She
had recently moved to our old home place, tore down the old house, and put
a trailer on it. They planned to live there until they built a new brick home next
to the trailer ( which they planned to rent later.). Our home was up a hollow and
on a hill with a winding gravel road leading up to it. There were no neighbors
after you started up the gravel road and my daughter and I felt like it was more
isolated than it actually seems now.
Anyhow, one day, my sister while visiting my mother. told her that my
brother-in-law (her husband) had to be gone out of state for some job training
and would be gone from home three nights. My daughter and I discussed at
length , after she left, that we bet she was scared to stay there with just the
kids. (She had never been scary, before, even foolishly leaving her doors
un-locked ) but we summed it up in our minds that we were going to go stay
with her to keep her from being scared (as we would have been).
We got our things and traipsed off to Sister's house, feeling very self-
satisfied at the good deed we were doing. And getting to visit her as well.
Now my sister did not have a phone at that time but she welcomed her un-
expected visitors with some surprise but gladly also. We all set around
talking and snacking until it got quite late. Then Sister fixed us beds on the
couches, and she retired to the bedrooms with the children. The first thing
that happened to scare me was when I mistakenly opened her son's door
looking for the bathroom. He had rigged something to the door to cause
lights to illuminate dummies he had made with horrid Halloween masks.
At the same time, the stereo blarred out wide-open . I almost fainted.
My nephew had always been gifted with electronic ability , and it was
evident at that young age that he was a natural for that field. Scary, though.
I had almost drifted off to sleep when the next incident happened. It
jarred me instantly awake and I jumped to my feet. A loud banging , like
someone beating on the tin sides of the trailer, sent me running to her bed-
room, tripping and falling along the way. Daughter heard me and joined
me there. We wer both screaming, telling Sis that someone was breaking in.
All the children rushed in to see what was going on. After a moment we
heard it again. Instead of being alarmed, Sister told us, "That's our goats,
climbing on the low roof of a shed nearby." So, gradually, we calmed
down, but the kids, alarmed, wanted Sis to sleep in their room with them.
We lay back down . I could see through the open door of her bedroom
and the moonlight streamed through the big window on the end of the trailer.
At first , I did not see him as my eyes adjusted to the darkness, but then I saw
something that sent panic through me. A man's head was sillhouetted in the
window. I let out a blood-curdling scream that brought everyone running
and falling on each other . Over all the crying and screaming, my Sister got
a few coherent words, and managed to quiet me. Grabbing a fire extinguisher,
(for what purpose I don't know) we gingerly edged through the hallway and
there he was! When she flipped on the light, there sat the King on the window
sill. The life size bust of Elvis was one of her prize possessions and it was the
culprit that had almost given me a heart attack. In the moonlight it had looked
exactlly like a man peering in through the window. Shaky and weak, we began
to get the nervous giggles out of relief. We had a bunch of cranky kids by now
and a throbbing headache. We all piled into the bedrooms together and stayed
wide-eyed until the daylight began to creep over the mountain.
As dawn descended on us, we asked Sister if she'd be all right to stay
now and she assured us she would. (Even encouraged us to go, I believe.) So,
we drove home, fell into our own beds and slept till noon. In the future when her
husband had to be gone, she kept it quiet or else did not invite my daughter and me.
(She told my mother that though she appreciated our concern, she did not need us
to keep her from getting scared anymore and to please keep us home.)
So, that is the saga of how we saved Sister from the goats and the bust of Elvis.
My daughter conquered her fear of staying alone when she went through a divorce,
and had to face it even though she never learned to like it. I, unfortunately, am
still working on my fear. With God's help, perhaps I will be victorious, someday.
Written by krmprm Blog about this entry |
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that night you spent at your sister's caused me to laugh now in retrospect with all the scary things you experienced; I too don't like to be home alone at night-time; I don't do it that often; I think if it was an every night occurrence I would have to get used to it because eventually my body would need to sleep; my husband rarely goes out of town these days
this was a cute story to read
betty -
That was another great story. You do a great job!!! I have 2 sisters and the tales we could tell would fill a book too. I hope you succeed in getting over being afriad. I've always felt pretty secure having a dog or two around. It will be different when my beagle is no longer around...I've had pets all my married life but now I wouldn't be up to another. My beagle is 15 in June and he's getting up there in years. My dirty old bird always squawks when ever any one comes by so maybe she'll be my guard bird. She is 28 now and is supposed to live to be 40...
'On Ya' - ma -
I've enjoyed reading this. I always had way too much thrust on my as a child to afraid of much. Thankfully it helped once I went deaf. Nothing can be more frightening than not being able to hear anything around you in the middle of the dark night. (Hugs) Indigo
http://journals.aol.com/rdautumnsage/ravens-lament/ -
At last I have found your journal.I have enjoyed the laugh,but I can also relate to everything you go through regarding being afraid of being alone........I am and always will be terrified of being alone.No matter what people say or do I just cannot get rid of the fear.I always think mine stems from when my parents worked late nights andI was very young they left me with my elder sis looking aftre me..She used tosneak off to meat her boyfriend and I had to say nothing to mother and father. Not very far but she still left me alone and I hated being alone.So I never had an older sister as yourself who was protective, rather the other way.So I do feel for anyone with this horrible phobia.It's a nightmare sometimes.Know you are in my prayers .Thankyou for sharing your lovely story I realy enjoyed it.Stay safe..I now have you on alerts.Take Care God Bless Kath astoriasand http://journals.aol.co.uk/ast
oriasand/MYSIMPLERHYMES
4/30/08 5:03 PM
Take care (and please don't be scared!),
Beth
http://journals.aol.com/luvrt