living life

10:35:59 PM EST
Feeling Sad

Today is my Moms Birthday

She would have been 89! Last week was the one year anniversary of her passing.

It has been a long year..I can't count the times that I needed to talk to her, ask her advice and just know that she was there with me in my corner no matter what..Her and I against the world..lol..

I seem to be having a harder time today than I did last week..I don't know why that would be.

Tonight before I took Jeremy to work and then headed to my own job, we stopped at the store and bought a helium balloon..I told Jeremy that we would hold onto the string together and then let it go, while wishing Grandma Happy Birthday..His reply,,,,Right here out in public...lol...Yes...and that is exactly what we did..Maybe it is a little strange. I know that we don't have to DO something for our loved ones to know that we are thinking of them..but I wanted to do something for my Moms birthday and I had always gotten her a balloon..So, I will keep the tradition going..

My heart will ache for her until I take my last breath.

Written by layla44808 Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 5 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

9:35:43 PM EST

I am taking these pictures right off the disc..I hope they stay where I put them. lol

The first picture is: Cameron-4,,his sister Destiny-3 and Mason-4. They are in our party tent...oh the fun we had..

The second picture was taken in my house up north, with friends, Lisa, Me and Joe..

The third picture is also my house up north..

If these stay put until tomorrow, then I will post some new ones. At least it gives you a little bit of an idea of my life and family..

Until then, Stay warm and toasty.....

Written by layla44808 Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 1 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

12:47:00 PM EST
Feeling Frustrated

I think I have entered aol hell!! I tried to upload a few pictures and it keeps telling me that the file could not be found...hummm, strange since I even tried a few that I have used before and even they couldn't be found..Oh well, I'll try again later..

I do have to go to Walgreens today to pick up some pictures that I had developed. I always get the disc. I am going to try getting some pictures in my journal from that. Since we can't figure out how to make the darn computer acknowledge the camera..lol...I hope that works, there are alot of pictures of the kids that I would love to share with you...

Last night I was going to go listen to a band with friends...But as it turned out, they weren't going to get there until after nine..Well, I wasn't in the mood to start out that late..Not that I am a party pooper, just more cautious as I get older...lol..

I asked Jeremy if he wanted to go have a bite to eat and a drink with me...I was actually surprised when he said yes..So, off we went. We stopped at one place that I go to once in a while..We only stayed there about half an hour..then went to a place that he wanted to go to..He knows a guy that is a cook and he thought he was working..This place is for an older crowd and at first Jeremy had the look that said...What was I thinking....pretty funny...I could tell that he wasn't really interested in staying, so I said we would leave in about 20 minutes..Then he decided to check out the music..and low and behold, they had numerous songs that he wanted to play..Now he wants to stay...that's fine, but now I want to eat...lol..We ordered some food. I had the grilled porkchop sandwich, he had a pizza...The food was really good. As it turned out, he had put five dollars into the machine to play songs...I told him that I didn't think we would be there that long...lol..But costs being what they are today,,he didn't end up with too many songs..by the time we were done eating, his songs had all played..

There were a few people there that I had originally meet when I was a bartender. The only time I see them is when I go to a bar. which isn't often these days..so, it was nice seeing them and wishing them a happy new year..

I think we were home by 10:30..that was fine for me..We had an enjoyable time together. His first new years eve out and about..And safe with mom...lol...just how I like it...

When we got home, I checked the mailbox..I've been slacking in that area. There was a thinking of you card from my husband...and there was a Christmas card from my former step-daughter..Now, I hate to refer to her as my former step-daughter..Just not sure what else to say...Her name is Nikki. I have been in her life since she was born...(long story)..So, she has always known me as her step-mom...She was 16 when her dad and I got divorced..and I did the worst thing. I got too involved in my own life and let her and her brother slip away from me..Her brother Philip is the one that hung himself..Anyway, I have had minor contact with Nikki thru the years..but not a real relationship like we shared when I was with her dad..So, imagine my surprise when I open the card and inside she had written, Sheri, Carlos and Jeremy..And above my name, she had written Mom...My heart wanted to break and swell with pride at the same time..I e-mailed her right away..I told her how I felt about her. I told her how much I miss and love her..And that I am sorry for not doing some of the things that I should have. I let her know that I want a relationship with her and her three girls..I always think,,,,,,if her dad and I had stayed together,,,those kids would be my grandkids..and damn it..I want that..I have let too much time slip away. If she is willing, I will be there for her and the girls in any way that I can. Keeping fingers crossed....

So, that's my story..We can have regrets, but we can't dwell on them..we can't cry the blues about them if we aren't willing to make some changes.....

Well, I guess I should get dressed and head out to the store..I need to get some black clothes dye...ugh...I spilled bleach on the Only black jeans that fit me like a glove....my daughter suggested that I try to dye them..even if it helps a bit...

Have a wonderful new years day!

Update::  I never did make it to Walgreens..I did make it to Walmart...lol..I had a gift certificate from my step-daughter. I bought the black dye..And I found some black jeans..They aren't as cute as the pair that I ruined, but they fit pretty darn good..I will probably get at least one more pair..I also found a couple of t-shirts for three dollars each..Oh I love a good deal...Then,,,,,I made the mistake of going to the Christmas section...Oh that one cost me a pretty penny...lol..but everything was 70% off..How could I pass that up..I bought an ornament for my niece, she is a Christmas Baby,,it's a birthday cake..then they had some ornaments that are made to be in a house with a baby or toddler around...soooo cute..so I bought it forher in honor of the baby she is going to have in July...

I have my Moms small tree that and they had the little ornaments. I got some of them..My Mom collected horses..and these are the cutest little horses. I thought that would be fitting for her..She also had to buy one of the Christmas bears every year..I have the last one that she bought..They had a small one that is dressed up in a Christmas outfit..so of course I had to get that in honor of my Mom..lol..she would love it..

Hummm, what else did I get? one red and one gold silk Christmas stocking, and a bag of nice bows..This was the first year that I really took an extra effort to make my packages look really special. material ribbon instead of the cheap stuff. I'll tell you, it sure made a huge difference..They also had hugh material bows so I bought a bunch of those..I should have bought another tote to put all of the new stuff in..lol...I am very pleased with what I got today, especially with what I paid for it..

Tomorrow after work I will have to get my pictures so I can spend some time this week-end trying to share some pictures with you....

Written by layla44808 Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 2 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

5:22:37 PM EST
Feeling Hopeful

D's Designs 2007

Well, tonight is THE big night...lol..What plans do you have?  Staying home curled up with your sweetie? Going to a friends house? Going out on the town? Whatever your plans are...Be Safe, be happy and look forward to the New Year that is upon us...

I still haven't decided what I'm going to do..lol. Nothing like waiting until the last moment...A girl I worked with at my night job dates a guy in a very well known band from my area..She has invited me to join her group tonight. I told her that I might come just for a little while..Maybe from 8-10..and then it's home for me..I certainly don't want to be out on the roads late..and I certainly don't want to be at the bar at midnight....When every man alone thinks it's the perfect time to get a free kiss...No, that is NOT my thing...If I can't be around people that I know, I would rather stay at home..So, that is where midnight will find me...lol...

I haven't done too much today..worked for 4 hours..came home..did some bills on the computer...It's already 4:15...I think I'm going to run a nice warm bath and just read for awhile...I'll have to run downstairs and get another cup of coffee first..I didn't sleep very well last night..I think I woke up every few hours. I don't know what that was about...With my luck, I'll fall asleep in the tub..I did that the other day and let me tell you, I was one cold puppy when I woke up...lol...

To each and everyone of you I wish you a very Happy New Year! Filled with peace, love, health and happiness!sugar shack keepsakes

 

Written by layla44808 Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 1 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

8:14:08 PM EST
Feeling Quiet

 

 

It's already 7:00pm..I don't know where the time goes. I only worked four hours today. Ohhhh, that's right, I went to the bar after work to watch some of the Packer game..lol I had decided that I have been in this house doing something or at work...and I wanted  to just get out for a bit...It was fun. I didn't stay for the whole game..In fact, I am bad, I don't even know if they won the game...lmao....they were ahead when I came home..All I know is I had a good time..They put food out for half time...Not so good..I only had a small ham sandwich..and a cheese and cracker...but I swear that ham didn't taste right. I'm glad that I didn't get sick from it...that's all I need..lol

I actually took the time today to read the entire Sunday paper..For the last few weeks it seems like I am at least a day or more late on reading my paper...Well, today I read the whole darn thing..and it felt good..Now all I have to do is pick it up off the floor...lol..As I read it, I just tossed it into a pile...

I only work four hours tomorrow morning..then I have New Years Day off..That will be a nice break..

Speaking of the New Year! Does anyone have special plans? Do you have resolutions?

Going to get going for now....I always watch The Amazing Race...it usually runs late due to the football games.....

Have a wonderful week!

 

Written by layla44808 Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 2 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

10:10:40 PM EST
Feeling Chillin'

  Do you ever feel let down after the Holidays?? I sometimes do. I think we put so much of ourselves into getting prepared and then it is just over so darn fast..I suppose it doesn't help that things in my life are up in the air right now...Oh well, what will be will be...

It was a good Christmas! Even with everything that is going on, we managed to set things aside and have a wonderful day with all of the kids and grandkids..

My daughter and three grandkids came over for Christmas Eve. I had made chicken mole'. We watched "It's a wonderful life" and just enjoyed each others company. Very relaxed..Carlos had gone to his sisters house where their entire family gets together for the holidays..He had invited me to go, but I no longer feel like I would want to be around any of them..

My two older grandsons stayed overnight, so they were here for Christmas morning..When they got up, they opened a present each and then had breakfast. Carlos and I spent the morning getting the food prepared..We put everything in slow cookers and crock pots..It was Wonderful..By the time everyone got her around noon, we had all of the food ready and we could eat as we wanted to. I think that this was one of the most calm Christmases I have had in a long time. 

It was so nice that the younger grandkids are now old enough to go play in the rec room with the older ones. They had made a tent down there..lol. that is one thing they all love..We were able to sit in the living room without having to spend the entire time trying to keep the little ones occupied...It was very nice.

Clean up went well..I think after everyone left, we had the house picked up within 45 minutes...Time to relax and relax I did...lol...

Until about 9:00pm. I had decided to take Jeremy to spend some time staying at his Dads..I really didn't want him around during the time that Carlos has off. I didn't want him in the middle of what can sometimes get nasty..Carlos doesn't always take Jeremys feeling into consideration when he gets nasty. He will say things that I don't feel Jeremy should have to listen to..Anyway, I talked to Jeremy and told him why I was doing what I was doing..I felt that he still felt that he was being pushed out of his home...After I dropped him off, I cried for a while and the next day at work, I cried some more. I did not feel right about sending my son away...even if I did it for all of the right reasons. I called up my ex and told him that I needed to talk to Jeremy about things and that I thought I would bring him home..So, after work yesterday the three of us met and had a really nice talk..Jeremy wanted to come home. We talked about what Jeremy should do if he felt that Carlos was picking on him...My ex has good friends that live across the street and they have already said that if he is having any problems, he should just come over there until they can get in touch with his Dad...So, I feel better having my son home. I can only hope that Carlos doesn't try to put Jeremy in the middle of our mess..

Other than that,,,,life is great...lol...and guess what?? I still love my job...lol..I have to work this week-end.. The way that it has been done so far is: if you work the week-end, then on Friday you only work four hours, Sat. you work four hours and the same for Sun. and Mon..They don't want to have to pay any overtime. After the first of the year...when we work the week-ends, we will work 8 hours Sat and Sun. but we will have Friday and Monday off...And the best part about it is we will each only have a week-end every 14 weeks...That isn't too bad..

I was glad to leave work early today..We got hit with major snow...I left work about two hours after the snow started, so it wasn't too bad yet...but by the time it stopped snowing at around 6:30pm..we had probably gotten a good 6-8 inches..although I'm sure the weather reports will say 4-5....lol...My ex came by and plowed my driveway about an hour or so before it stopped snowing...that was very nice..I went out a little while ago to shovel what came down after and I swear there had to be another 2-3 inches..and of course the big plow had come through a few times so there was at least 6-8 inches at the end of my drive...It was really heavy snow..it is clinging to the trees..it looks like a winter wonderland out there,,very pretty. I did take my camera out after I was done and took a couple of pictures...I hope they turn out...

Well, it's a little after 9:00, I better start thinking about getting some sleep...

My husband called from up north tonight..all worried that I was going to go out tonight...Yeah right...I don't have the energy...lol...Otherwise I might give that some thought...lol....He just doesn't get it...He filed for divorce and he is the one worrying what I am doing. I don't ask him any questions....Oh, I don't want to get started on that....

I hope everyone has a great week-end....

Written by layla44808 Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 4 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

9:35:07 PM EST
Feeling Chillin'

  To Kims Family.. " I shaved my legs for this?"

 

 

Written by layla44808 Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 1 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

12:29:32 AM EST
Feeling Quiet

 

This little bird reminds me of my Petey...I had him when I was about 12......I've never had a bird since. Maybe that's what I need....

I'm not going to do any complaints or sad news today..I will say that I have gotten an attorney......

I had a good day at work..I am tired though..It is such a large complex. I talk to so many people throughout the day. And do you know, I still have not heard one bad thing about working there. It is just a pleasure to work with people that enjoy their jobs. I had a few of the Sisters come up to me to say that they would like to give me a little gift of appreciation, but it is against the rules to do that. I told them not to worry about it. Just being a part of a great community like that is enough for me..And I mean that.

I was going to get some more Christmas shopping done tonight after work, but my check didn't arrive..At first, I felt really frustrated because I want to finish things up..But then I thought about it..and I know I couldn't change it..So,,,,,I decided not to worry about it..If I have to, I will go shopping tomorrow night. Believe me, I do not want to go shopping during the day..lol. I figure anytime after 8:00pm should be good..

Tonight I made some more of my cookie dough. I will give some of it to my daughter. Tomorrow my grandaughter is coming over for us to watch "It's a wonderful life". I think we will also spend some time making cookies and maybe some candy..My Mom always made the candy...so time for me to take over for her...if I can find the time and energy...ha-ha...

Well, it's getting late and I am tired. So, I will bid you good-night and sweet dreams..

I am sending out Prayers to all that need them. Keeping you in my thoughts.

Written by layla44808 Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 3 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

9:01:48 PM EST

It's been a very eventful week....I'll start with last Saturday..We did go to my step-daughters house..It was alot of fun. The kids had a blast. Although, we did miss Santa. My grandson knew that it was Uncle Rico.

We left there and went to dinner...Oh, it was good. I had the Tequila cream chicken, my husband had the Cuban pork. He really enjoyed it. We were not thrilled with the rice. Now, we both like rice. but this stuff didn't even taste like rice and it was green..Oh well, the rest of the meal was great. We were home and sleeping by 9:30...lol..

On Monday, I went to see his attorney to see if we could come to some sort of settlement agreement. Well, that did not turn out. His attorney is an ass..and I more or less let him know that. I told him that Carlos made a comment about me not being able to go to our house up north. I let him know that he needed to talk to him and let him know that until we had a settlement agreement, I can go there anytime I want to..He had the nerve to ask me why I needed to go there. I told him that I wasn't sure if I would, but that I could if I wanted to. He wanted to know what I needed to get out of the house, I told him that I wasn't sure, but I had every right to do so..well, it went downhill from there. I told him that he was the enemy and that I didn't have anymore to say..He should just get a court date and we would let the judge decide..he said that that would be more time and more money....My reply?? OH WELL.

I don't think he liked me too much...l0l..

I called two attorneys today..one wants two thousand dollars for the retainer...ugh..I had a consultation with him a month or so ago..I explained the situation. I told him that I just got a new job and I get paid this Friday, I would forgo getting anything more for Christmas and give him my whole check. He finally agreed to see me on Friday.

Then I got a return call from the attorney that had done my sons adoption. He will see me tomorrow at four..My ex is on a friendly basis with him. And in fact, ran into him tonight. My ex told him that I really needed help and with Christmas here, it was really hard for me..He also told him that he would back me up on the money..that he would even be willing to help me pay it off. Nice...So, we will see what he has to say tomorrow about where I stand..

Carlos has had a very negative attitude towards Jeremy these last few months..Finds fault in just about every thing that he does...and he knows that this is the one area that he should not go with me..I am a mother before I am any thing else..and he will find that out soon..

I am having Jeremy go and stay with his dad for a month or two until I can get things settled here. I will not have my son be the scapegoat for anyone..

So, although I have tried to keep things calm around here so that we could get through the Holidays..I'm not sure what is going to happen now. I don't know if he is going to stop his daughters from coming over with the kids for Christmas day as planned or not..Hopefully not. If he does, I will just go to their houses....

I will not let him ruin the Holidays for me..

Well, I guess I better get some work done before  I hit the hay.

I hope tomorrow brings smiles and sunshine to everyone.....

 

 

Written by layla44808 Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 2 comments: Show Recent | Add your own

12:42:32 AM EST
Feeling Quiet

It has been a good week..Busy, but good..lol..and I still have a ton of things to do..

Last night I did something that I have never done before....I went to a book signing. And guess who was doing the signing?????? Caroline Kennedy..I was so excited. This is my Christmas gift from my daughter. I couldn't have asked for anything better..Oh, that's right, I did ask for this..lol..They sold over 700 tickets to this event. It was held at the Milwaukee Public Library. My daughter took me there and dropped me off so I wouldn't have to deal with traffic and parking. We figured that I would be there for at least two or three hours..Well, I happened to be one of the first 100 people there, so when it came time to open the doors and start, I was out of there within 20 minutes..It was very exciting. And I really feel like I own a piece of history...In todays paper they said that there were between 700 and 1000 people..Oh my, I could have been there yet today...l0l...

Tomorrow is my husbands 54th birthday. And although we are in the process of getting a divorce, we have been trying to  be normal through the Holidays...well,, as much as we can anyway..ha-ha..I am taking him out to dinner. We haven't been to this place, so that is kind of nice. They serve Mexican, Cuban, and some other types of food. I think we will try to pick different things so we can taste more than one type..

I think because he has made nice birthdays for me in the past, I am going to go to the restaurant ahead of time and drop off a couple of balloons and a small cake...

It is actually our 5th wedding anniversary also..Although we won't be celebrating that, which will be kind of weird..But whatcha gonna do?

Before we head out to dinner, we are going to stop by his daughters house. She is having a Christmas get together for the little ones..We thought we would stop in and say hi...I sure know that all three little ones are going to say theywant to come home with us...lol...Not tonight sweeties...

I got the rec room cleaned up..My grandson Paris put up a small tree tonight. I put the lights on and he did the rest..It looks really cute..

Well, I'm really beat, it's almost midnight, time for me to get some sleep..

I hope everyone has a great week-end...I'll be looking at journals tomorrow...I hope.

Written by layla44808 Permalink | Blog about this entry |  Add to del.icio.us |  digg this This entry has 3 comments: Show Recent | Add your own