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1:20:00 PM EDT
Feeling Frustrated
Hearing "Welcome to my NIghtmare" - Alice Cooper
Painter's Hell
I hate to paint... despise it, detest and deplore the very idea of covering an area of room, floor, door, wall, or other such place with a layer of paint. Don’t get me wrong dear reader I absolutely love the look of something newly painted, when done properly. There is something divine in the way a fresh coat of paint can transform a drab, beat-up, chipped surface into something so clean and fresh. Just please in the name of all things holy let someone else do this dastardly task. My current impression of the concept of hell would be to be locked in an endless series of rooms with nooks, crannies, woodwork, and of course a brand new, plush carpet upon the floor. My tormentor would then hand me all the tools of a painter including various sized rollers, brushes, pads, etc and then tell me each room must be meticulously and perfectly covered in an even layer of paint. Every dollop of paint not landing upon the intended painted surface; i.e. paint on the carpet or stained woodwork, or my 3-piece black pinstriped suit; would be like a touch of flame upon my skin. You see, when I paint the devilish liquid takes on a life of its own and begins to explore the room, my body, and the entire house independently. I have covered the entire floor with layers of plastic, covered that with newsprint, and still paint gets on the floor!! I can set the paint cover in the next county yet still somehow I manage to step in it and suddenly I am dancing about trying NOT to foot paint floor and furniture. It may take me two hours to use that miraculous blue painters tape to carefully, and effectively cover all woodwork, floor, and light fixtures yet somehow… somehow that damnable liquid color gets under the tape or finds that ONE PLACE the tape did not cover or somehow lifted up away from. Oh dear Creator save me from another moment with paintbrush in hand and a surface before me awaiting transformation. Part of my dilemma is that I so want the task to be neat, clean, evenly covered, and all that other stuff… therefore it takes me MORE time to prepare to paint something then the actual painting. And then there is clean up, oh no dear reader we don’t have time to get into THAT fiasco! I’d throw everything away after every effort if money wasn’t so, so, SO very tight!
I could rant on for much longer but alas I’ve already run out of time. For you see… I have to get back to… painting. If this is my last entry you will be able to find me in the local establishment with padded rooms, the attendants still trying to pry a paintbrush from my clenched fists while a look of anguish is… well.. painted upon my colorful, bespeckled face. Perhaps you will find me wandering your fair city panhandling upon the street with an open paint can set out before me as I pantomime over and over and over again a frustrated, desperate man painting an imaginary wall or ceiling. Be generous my friends, they say therapy is a costly venture.
Be well… Laugh often… Play hard.
“There is only one real failure in life that is possible, and that is not to be true to the best one knows.”
-John Farar, Australian composerWritten by madmanadhd Blog about this entry |
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Men - You're all alike. Outside of the artist addressing a canvas, I don't know one of you who likes to paint.
Jude
http://journals.aol.com/jmorancoyle/MyWay -
I share your feelings about painting...it's the preparation that is the4 worse!
Marti
http://journals.aol.com/sunnyside46/MidlifeMusings -
I never have the patince for the nooks and crannys
donna In TEXAs
sweeping the cobwebs of my mind -
I love to paint walls. Every room in my house is a different color! However if we were all the same then this world would be boring.
Kelli
http://journals.aol.com/kamdghwmw/noonmom
7/31/07 12:14 AM