From the Edge of Dementia

Howdy Folks,

Sorry I was gone for a couple of days.  I had some "computer glitches" going on which kept me offline for a couple of days.  But you probably wouldn't have heard too much from me anyway because I was throwing up for a good bit of that time. 

It's funny but every now and again Ma and I will get Chinese food from the local joint.  She always gets shrimp lo mein and I always get beef lo mein.  She always asks me what I'm getting and then always says, "I don't like the looks of that Chinese meat, I'm getting shrimp.  That Chinese meat just doesn't look right to me."  

I always laugh and say, "It's just beef, Ma, for godsake."

So we anyway, we ate Chinese on Saturday night. 

I woke up Sunday morning fine.  Made coffee.  Started to get Pop up.  And suddenly I was puking my guts up.  I felt hot, faint, and really, REALLY sick to my stomach for the rest of the day.  Couldn't keep anything down all day. 

Around 3:00 this morning I was so hungry and feeling a little better so I went upstairs to eat some plain crackers and drink some ginger ale. 

Didn't even get through the second cracker. 

Today I'm still feeling weak and a little sick to my stomach but I'm not eating anything today.  I HATE THROWING UP MORE THAN ANYTHING (except maybe that feeling right before you throw up).

So, naturally, I've been thinking about the "Chinese Meat" for the last two days.  You know, it doesn't really look like any other kind of beef I've ever eaten anywhere else or prepared myself.  It doesn't really taste like beef (something I always attributed to the other flavors in the dish).  Maybe it isn't beef.

A few minutes ago Ma asked me how I was feelin' and I said, "I think I've learned my lesson.  No more monkey meat for me."

Ma looked up at me with a most serious expression her face and said, "Monkey meat?  Do you think that's what it is?  Are you sure it's not dog?" 

I'm really glad Dot was asleep on the sofa for that one.

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• #1 Comment from helenzbad 
  12/4/06 4:22 PM | Permalink

  There is a place I go for sushi and chinese food at lunch sometimes...in fact, I went the today.  Among their many delicacies, they have this stuff that basically resembles chicken (or something) on a stick.  Even though I get it every time I go there, I can't help whispering "kitty, kitty, kitty" under my breath as I put it on my plate.  Hasn't made me sick, though.  But I am suspicious that it used to say "meow" and not "cluck cluck cluck."
  
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