Tales & Tails of New York

Coco is welcome in our home!" the email says.  

Unfortunately, that is all the message says.  The sender gives no contact information or phone number.  

Do such people expect us to send a dog to them as an email attachment?  

I responded to this mail with an even shorter message:   "Call us."   And then the phone number.  

Based on past experience, I imagine that picking up a phone will prove too great an obstacle for this individual.  

Still, it must have felt so good to send out such a warm and generous offer!  

Like Is Not Enough  

Two days ago, a pleasant young woman called interested in adopting one of our kittens, Tammy.  

When I informed "Kim" that Tammy would have to be adopted with another kitten/cat, she was enthusiastic to the suggestion.  I then described several kittens and cats we have whom Tammy knows and is very compatible with.  

"Susy is very outgoing and affectionate.  Tammy is a little shy.  The two kitties complement each other perfectly and get along very well."  

We set up a tentative arrangement for Kim to see the kittens the next day.  

But, that night I received a phone message from another rescuer.  

"Kim is at my home and is adopting my kitten, Snow.  Can she come to your place now and adopt Tammy?"  

I didn't hear the message until a couple of hours later and was puzzled by it.  

The next day I called both, Kim and the other rescuer, whom I will call, "Greta."  

Kim informed me that she wanted Greta's white kitten as a "Christmas gift" for her roommate who is currently in California visiting her folks for the holidays.  

"But, I can still adopt two kittens from you!" she assured me.  

"That cannot be done until your roommate returns," I told Kim.  "I have to meet all members of the household to be sure everyone is on the same page."  

Later I spoke with Greta who enthusiastically praised Kim as a beautiful and very nice young woman who "loves animals and really wants to help."  

"She's even offered to foster other cats for me and dogs!  I really like her!"  

"That is nice, Greta, but she has a roommate who's in California right now.   Does the roommate expect to come home to a house full of animals?   Kim's not in position to take in a bunch of animals or really, any, until we have spoken to her roommate.  Moreover, Kim seems to be a little all over the map on this.  She seems unfocused."   

Greta is fairly new to cat/dog rescue and placement.  She is a kind and caring person whose heart is huge and in the right place.  But, I am not sure she is yet, familiar with all the pitfalls of this work.  

I imagine she likes Kim so well, because the two seem somewhat similar.  

One thing I have learned over the years:  

The people one "likes" are not necessarily the best people to adopt to.  Someone may be very personable, kind, fun, intelligent or generous in intentions and spirit, but could also have difficulty with long-term commitment, consideration of others, or have a living situation which is not conducive to the long-term keeping of pets.  

On the other hand, I have often done adoptions with people I would not choose as personal friends. They may be a little too stuffy, fussy or particular, but they are excellent caregivers to animals and have track histories in committed care.  

As for doing adoptions when a member of the household isn't present?  

Many years ago, I adopted my first dog at the age of 18 while still living with my mother.  

Mom "OK'ed" me to bring a dog home, but she declined to come with me to the ASPCA to pick one out.  

I adopted a one-year-old Spitz mix dog, whom I named "Sheppie."  

From the day I brought Sheppie home with me, my Mom didn't take to her and Sheppie did not take to my Mom.  

"God, couldn't you find a prettier dog than that?" My mother queried.  

Sheppie, seeming to sense my mother's displeasure avoided her like the plague.  

Sheppie always took my side in arguments with my mother.  On several occasions when my Mom was particularly loud, argumentative or boisterous to me, Sheppie bit her.  

It remained a very chilly relationship for all the years I had Sheppie -- even when I eventually moved out to marry.  

So yes, it is important to meet all members of ahousehold when doing any kind of animal adoption.  

It is sadly, many an animal who becomes an "issue" of contention, jealousy, protection or possessiveness between partners, roommates or even, parent and child.                                                    

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