Queen of Wishful Thinking

Mon, 06 Oct 2008 02:40:32 GMT

Dear Garbage Bandit,

I caught you digging through my neighbor's recycling bin last month and it pissed me off. I hollered out to you that you can't go through people's garbage.

"If you're going to go through my garbage, pay my bill!"

You looked at me and held on to a beer bottle while I repeated myself.

"You can't do that!"

You scurried away and hopped into your blue van that was still running....thanks for fouling up the air even more while wasting gas. You were a woman and I was shocked.

Dear Garbage Bandit II,

It totally creeps me out that you went through my bin while I was sleeping. I know this because the recycling was put out the night before and I saw you the next morning around 6:30 scoping out the neighborhood. You walked past my house and barely looked at my bin. You were waiting for more bins to be filled after you went through mine and my neighbor's business. You were pushing a grocery cart and you looked like a nice man. You still pissed me off.

To all you others out there, maybe, just maybe, if you ASKED if you could have my bottles, I might say yes.

Don't go through my garbage. I'm paying for it, dammit.

Sat, 04 Oct 2008 05:28:16 GMT

I guess AOL is shutting us writers down as of October 31. I will have to take the time to go through all my entries and cut and paste the best ones. What a bitch. I don't know if I will follow the crowd to the other blog site....Blogger.com, I think. Just seems like a big fat hassle.

Saved by the sanitary bell

Sat, 27 Sep 2008 04:31:48 GMT

I'm using this interesting font called "Kartika." I am not double-spacing my words on purpose.

The last several months have been a drag whenever I go shopping...for anything! However, I do luck out with clearance items...anyway...everything is jacked up in price.

For example, I went to Walgreen's to buy a "monthly" product and noticed a sale sign stating "buy one get one for 1/2 price." Okay. The original price was $2.49 but on the sale sticker, it says $2.79.

I decided not to be shy and ask an employee, who was down on his knees, about the confusing prices. Turns out he's the manager.

Well!!! For the first time ever, my ears didn't turn red from embarrassment! He, however, did not look me in the eyes.

He was startled. He stared. And then he stammered, "Oh, uh, looks like, uh, a price change that uh...."

"Didn't catch up to the sale?" I said.

"Uh, yeah," he says.

And sure as the sun shines, an announcement was made over the intercom, "Chuck, line one. Chuck, line one."

And off he went.

I bit my tongue. I almost said, "Saved by the bell!" I also wanted to ask if I could get a discount because of the incorrect pricing.

Eh, choose your battles, right?

Then riddle me this:

The receipt read: 1@2.49...2nd@1.69...2 for $4.20

Yeah.

Quotes of the day

Sun, 21 Sep 2008 04:32:50 GMT

I went to the "Chili On the Green" event in Fairview (the next town over) this afternoon with my friend and TB and his friend, too. My bro's band was playing and my mom was there with her friends. SIL came with my nephew who is already 9 months old! He is so much fun.

There was a wonderful carnival for the kids and TB won a free month of Tae Kwon Do lessons....he's been hounding us for months about joining, too!

I saw a lot of my regular customers/friends, talked to this and that person but I gotta tell ya....I heard a lot of crap come out of certain people that shall remain nameless. Heck, it doesn't matter anyway because they don't know about this blog.

Oh, but if you do, too bad. Yes, you were tipsy. It's cool. But still!!!

"What's up with the mail order bride?"

"My mom is hearing impaired." "What?" "My mom is hearing impaired." "What!?"

"Last year, we sat way up front, close to the band. Go ask the person in charge about it!"

"Ohhhh....you live by my ex-wife. I hate her."

"Isn't she a little young for him?"

"You wet yourself!!! Ha ha!!!"

"Fffshizzzle dah waaaanttiss!"

One of these sentences is not like the others....she was just toasted.

Wired

Wed, 17 Sep 2008 08:24:41 GMT

Well, of course I can't sleep! TB fell asleep on the way home from the concert and ES is semi-awake in the bedroom watching television.

My ears are ringing and I don't like it. It scares me. I haven't been to a concert that loud since...um...it's been awhile. We were at the front which was very close to the big speakers. I could feel my hair move a bit. Or maybe it was that putz who was screaming and breathing his hot breath all over my head. I should be a little nicer about him but he was kind of hard to deal with. And not just me...everyone around us.

I should start from the beginning....

After TB got home from school, it was chores and homework with no time to spare. He got it all done...did his daily required reading on the way to the theater where the Raconteurs were playing. We got to the Roseland around 4:30 and were 17th in line...general admission tickets...wanna get there early!! The first person had been there since 10:00 a.m.!! Now that's a bit much.

We enjoyed conversation, sharing snacks and candy with some fellow concert goers and of course, the people of Portland, Oregon who make it so interesting. A homeless man tried to pick a fight with someone and it was quite entertaining. TB went to throw away some trash and a woman said, "Hi baby! How was school today?" We all got a kick out of that.

The door opened at 7 p.m. and we got front row!!! No seating, though. Standing only. If you wanted to sit, you had to be 21 and sit up in the balcony area.

I saw an early opportunity to check out the tour merchandise and TB and a nice girl saved my spot for me. When I came back, this man who was about 280 pounds and 6 feet 6 inches was standing in my space. I nicely said, "Excuse me but my son and my friend are saving this spot for me. I went to go buy something."

He looked down at me in a disapproving manner but moved anyway. I turned around and said, "I just really need my son to be in front so that he can see the concert." Then the giant became jolly. He said he was taking his daughter to another concert in Seattle and totally understood.

But oy vey! The yelling and heavy breathing throughout the night was annoying as hell. Not just for me but everyone around us. I think he might have been a bit drunk. After the opening act, I turned around after getting smashed by him for the 14th time and he said, "Are you doing okay?" I said, "Well, I get these holes in my back from your elbows but it's okay." He says, "That's the price you pay for front row!" Oh, okay. He still used his stature to eventually alter the way people were standing behind me. It was hot and sweaty and TB was getting a big cranky.

The band was just outstanding tonight. They were great during their first tour but I see more coming out of these guys this time around. Portland was their first stop on the West Coast and you could see how much the band noticed the crowd's enthusiasm and love! Hell, most of us were just so darn happy about them coming back to make up for last spring anyway!

Back to my ringing ears. I've been home for over an hour and I think it's getting better.

Later.....

Tonight!!!!

Tue, 16 Sep 2008 19:38:55 GMT

TB and I are going to see the Raconteurs tonight! It'll be his second concert ever....yesssss!!

Birthdays and babies

Mon, 08 Sep 2008 06:54:07 GMT

Today was TB's big birthday party...10 years old! A milestone.

We had balloons and cake, confetti, music, good friends and family. I was so happy to have my two sons, my mom and my bro, his wife and little guy, my first nephew. He was just so gorgeous and cute. He didn't care what was happening and for awhile as I held him, I didn't give a damn about anything else, either. It's liberating.

In the meantime, everyone is asleep and there is way too much to do in the kitchen. It's so trashed...gotta go.

Peace out, bitches!

Cocktails and Jesus

Mon, 08 Sep 2008 06:49:15 GMT

"I gotta be honest with you. I love Jesus but I drink a little....just enough to thin the blood..."

Gladys Harvey

Austin, TX

The Mouse Murders

Sat, 06 Sep 2008 07:49:02 GMT

Roxy is a cat who acts as if she lives here. She reminds me so much of Athena, my beautiful flashpoint Persian who died ten years ago. However, I will not feed her. I will say hello and that's it. The new neighbors know about her, too. She gets around. I always say "Oh, there's the cat that isn't mine!"

Several days ago, Roxy and another cat pranced seductively around ES as he grilled chicken on the barbie. I have seen this new cat before but never in my yard.

Okay, something is going on with these two cats.

Three mice have been found in our yard since Tuesday. It's Friday night. One was found by the trampoline and the last two have been in the exact same spot in front of the garage. Hmmmm....strange coincidence for that to happen right after the newbie shows up.

Did Roxy kill all of them? Was it the other cat? Did they split the murders?

Bless the beasts and the children

Fri, 05 Sep 2008 03:31:44 GMT

Yesterday was the first day of school and TB came home to the usual questions I always have....

"Who is your teacher?"

"Who's in your class from last year?"

And so it goes....until I found out what happened on the bus. One of the kids yelled about everyone shutting up so he could hear the radio. He wasn't being mean. A girl yelled, "Don't tell me what to do!" The kid said something and she responded with, "At least I'm not white!" He shot back, "Shut up, Afro!"

This boy apologized to the girl this morning and she just told him to shut up and then some other kid made a comment about her smoking crack with her mother.

I am shocked and saddened by this situation. The little girl made a racist remark and the other kid only knew her to be an African-American....whatever....it doesn't matter. It literally makes me sick.

This little girl is a third-grader who already knows racism...in the 21st century?! I was hoping that the youngest ones would set an example and it worries me how many kids on the bus will take the racist remarks to heart.

I didn't know racism until I was 19 years old and moved to Ashdown, Arkansas (birthplace of Clinton, I believe) to marry my high school sweetheart. We were living with his godfather in a beautiful home with a lake and eventually moved to Texarkana. I worked at K-Mart and lost my job for being white. I was perplexed. I didn't understand it but I accepted it.

My grandmother said once, "Oh, he's just lucky he was born white." I know that she was talking about a racist politician or something and I remember thinking that I was born into a family that did not see color. I have two friends that are sisters and when Ifirst met them years ago, I had a hard time keeping their names straight. Sometimes Val was Donna or Donna was Val. Donna finally said, "Val is dark, Donna is light.....oh my god, Val....she doesn't see that." No, I didn't. I eventually got their names right.

Anyway, that's not the point. It is the year 2008, people!! What are you saying to your children? What are they hearing you say when you think they aren't listening?

We all bleed red.

Racism is a thing of the past. Leave it there!!!!!!