Promise... Me

I got this from Donna at: This and that, and hockey!

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well I'm sort of in a journal lull.  If I used that word correctly.  I just haven't been up to writing nor reading journals. I have been dealing with so many issues it's overwhelming.  Stress really does a number on a person.  My Dr put me in the hospital over night.. not a big deal just for pain management and for a rest. Hell who gets to rest in a hospital they wake you up every half hour to take your vitals and stuff.  Rest my ass.  Just got to sleep and they come in with a shot.. saying it's time for you pain meds. I said "like clearly I don't need them as I WAS SLEEPING!!" That nurse didn't like me after that.. but lets face it if a person is asleep they aren't in enough pain to need meds.  HELLO? Anyway the Dr said I still need to cut back on my stress. He has said this for a long time.. HOW? How does one cut "down their stress"? if it was that easy I would have done it.  I don't like being stressed out and having to deal with all this shit..

Billy's back... oh joy joy!  He came over the other night.. what fun! We go right back to the game.. I can't even put a name on it.. it's just a game.  He loves me.. he loves his son.. SHOW it!  BLAH.  I wasn't prepared as he usually comes back to MN at the end of May.  Oh well it's just two month more I have to deal with his BS.

So if anyone was wondering I've just been laying low and not into journals.  I will try and catch up on yours (yes you..since this is private and I read everyone that is a reader) as soon as I'm feeling more positive.. No one likes a Negative Nancy and that's how I feel.

Love and Hugs!

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Well we have court today... once at 8am and once at 1pm. Same place... the town I used to live in and swore I'd never go back.  It's all about my son (step... whatever..)

Anyway prayers needed.  He's in a mess he didn't create and I need whatever bad crap that is surrounding him to go away!!  Please pray things turn out okay for him.  He's been through enough!

Love to all,
Promise

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I am really having a hard time keeping up with my journal reading.  It isn't like I have as many journals I read as I used to.  When I first began reading journals.. if I like one entry I would put the journal on alerts. If I wasn't online for one day my mail box would get full. So I weeded through them and although I still have many journals I read it's not crazy out of control... yet I still have trouble keeping up with them.

There are a few I don't even know the people.. and most of the entries don't interest me... do I think I'll miss something if I don't have them on alerts.. miss that one entry of interest. Geez can we say OCD lol.

So I am going through my alerts today and getting rid of some of them so I can keep up with the ones I really do enjoy .. the ones that are of value to me.. and of coarse those of my friends (who I seem to be neglecting lately)

How does one keep up on these journals.. as I find new ones everyday. Oy Vey! ;)

PS. I notice not too long ago that journal Joe (WAS that his name) is no longer doing Magic smoke.  Does anyone know the name or should I say the email address of the guy who now writes that journal? I don't want to post my question in the comments... even if I did I can't find that journal. So if you have the link to it or you know his email please let me know.  Thanks!

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Going private for safety reasons! 

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AMBER Alert-Minnesota
An AMBER Alert has been issued for Anastasia Jones, a 4 year old black female. Anastasia is 3 feet 5 inches tall, weighs 60 pounds, has black hair, brown eyes, braided hair and is wearing a pink jogging suit with Princess written in purple on the front and purple boots. She was last seen at the Hennepin County Medical Center.

The first suspect is Miracle Angel Flowers, a 19 year old black female. She is 5 feet 2 inches tall, weighs 125 pounds, has black hair, brown eyes, braided hair and is wearing a black parka with fur around the hood and pink pants. The second suspect is Marlon Keith Jackson, a 37 year old black male. The suspect vehicle is a 1996 green Chrysler Sebring convertible with a black top and a license plate of RM086.

If you have any information about this child, please call the Minneapolis Police Department by dialing 9-1-1.

***Been updated she has been found!!****

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I was just thinking of that other journal I have going and I just want good in it. All the things I love.

I at first was just doing it for fun.  Now it is a reminder of what makes me happy.. things I enjoy.  If I think of something daily there will always be a positive thought in my day.

Some days it's hard to think of something I enjoy... most days I can find at least one thing.  Today I thought of many.

I want to thank the people that have been here for me during some trying times. Emotional support is something we all should be thankful for. 

God loves everyone... no matter what .. I believe we all go through horrible times to appreciate the good times. If we all had it so good would we even notice that? Would we notice the good things?  I doubt it. So the struggles we face daily are maybe tests of faith.. strength, courage.  But they do make the good things worth smiling about.  The good often comes just when we need it most. 

So with that said.  Thanks, my readers, for being a good part in my life. 

The people that read this for the wrong reasons.. well thank you too. 

As I have recently learned... the more people are mean to you.. the more the hurt you.. the more put down you are by other's .. the more God supports you, rewards you, protects you and gives you blessings.

I personally am thankful for all the blessings in my life.  From the small to the large. 

When I focus on that.. life can feel much better.

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So I was listening to a song (eminem's Lose yourself) and it hit me.

She already said over and over she doesn't believe anything that comes from me so why say I'm done doing what I love to do just because she posts my entries and stuff in her blog.

So it's back to business for me!  I am going to ignore her plain and simple and enjoy the company I keep online... and enjoy writing and reading journals.

Will I keep my other fun "silly" journal .. yep it's been very fun and actually therapeutic.  Plus people seem to like to read silly and unusual things .. and I can't let my Buggieboo down.. as we have our little game going there.  I have to admit she's winning :)

So I'm back hope you're all with me!  Enjoy darlings!

"Lose Yourself" (Edited)

Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted-One moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?

Yo, His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready
To drop bombs, but he keeps on forgetting
What he wrote down, the whole crowd grows so loud
He opens his mouth, but the words won't come out
He's chokin, how everybody's jokin now
The clock's run out, time's up over, bloah!
Snap back to reality, Oh there goes gravity
Oh, there goes Rabbit, he choked
He's so mad, but he won't give up that easy
No, he won't have it , he knows his whole back city's ropes
It don't matter, he's dope
He knows that, but he's broke
He's so stacked that he knows
When he goes back to his mobile home, that's when it's
Back to the lab again yo
This whole rap s
He better go capture this moment and hope it don't pass him

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You want it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo,

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You want it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime you better,

His soul's escaping, through this hole that it's gaping
This world is mine for the taking
Make me king, as we move toward a, new world order
A normal life is borin, but superstardom's close to post mortom
It only grows harder, only grows hotter
He blows us all over these ** is all on him
Coast to coast shows, he's known as the globetrotter
Lonely roads, God only knows
He's grown farther from home, he's no father
He goes home and barely knows his own daughter
But hold your nose cause here goes the cold water
These ho's don't want him no mo, he's cold product
They moved on to the next schmoe who flows
He nose dove and sold nada
So the soap opera is told and unfolds 



You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You want it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo,

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You want it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime you better,

No more games, I'ma change what you call rage
Tear this mothaf roof off like 2 dogs caged
I was playin in the beginnin, the mood all changed
I been chewed up and spit out and booed off stage
But I kept rhymin and stepwritin the next cypher
Best believe somebody's payin the pied piper
All the pain inside amplified by the fact
That I can't get by with my 9 to 5
And I can't provide the right type of life for my family
Cause man, these goddam food stamps don't buy diapers
And it's no movie, there's no Makai Pfeiffer, this is my life
And these times are so hard and it's getting even harder
Tryin to feed and water my seed, plus
Teeter-totter caught up between trying to be a father and a prima donna
Baby mama drama's screamin on and
Too much for me to wanna
Stay in one spot, another day of monotony
Has gotten me to the point, I'm like a snail
I've got to formulate a plot or I end up in jail or shot
Success is my only mothaf option, failure's not
Mom, I love you, but this trailer's got to go
I cannot grow old in Salem's lot
So here I go is my shot.
Feet fail me not this may be the only opportunity that I got

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You want it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo

You better lose yourselfin the music, the moment
You want it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime you better,

You can do anything you set your mind to, man

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