COMIC SECTION: For Men- Written by little ole me. Some mornings require a good laugh.

I am sooooooo tired of men whistling at me. I know I wear high cut skirts, low cleavage blouses and have inflated breasts but never ever do I dress like this to get attention. I do it for ME!

I have spent all day talking in complete sentences, finishing what I started and also preparing for the next day. Switching the TV channels like a Mad Hatter is like my dr. Phil.

Have you ever tried to hammering a nail when your happy? You'll miss it every time.

Sitting down is like a cat peeing on the carpet. Constant threats of donating my rocking chair, will make just about any man territorial.

I am a very good wife darn it but I feel like an object when he asks me to wear lingerie. Its selfish of him to ask that of me, since I don't enjoy it. I know I stay at home and don't cook great meals or keep the house up but its not JUST my job.

Truth is- I know I wore lingerie in the beginning sweetie but thats because you were the object of MY desire. I now object to your desire of me as an sex object because I have you now. I dont get it. Whats the point?

My husband thinks romantic movies are corny and boring. He wont go with me to any of them.

Truth is- He knows you have dropped hints of how he rarely kisses you and how he isn't romantic anymore. He just doesn't want to feel like a failure. So why watch a movie about a guy who actually listens.

Husband pleads- My wife says she knows me like the back of her hand. She says she can write down all the things that I have complained about over the years. The problem is she never writes them down to check to see if she regularly says YES to them.

"Your honor, at least 3 or 4 times a year my wife's slaps or pushes me. I don't know if I can slap her back. I feel a little wrong about that." Judge replies, " Sir, you can't. You hitting her back is like you hitting a child." His replies, "That's not what the feminists say."

I know when I am in love because the person I met has interesting opinions that I admire. I find our differences very interesting.

A few years later--I know when I am in love because my partner does everything just like me. They talk to the kids just like me, they have communication skills just like me and I feel like all my hard work in daily lectures, will one day create a happy marriage.

Truth is- Anyone being married for over 3 years becomes a strong advocate for cloning.

Men Your Solution---Be the Gingerbread Man --Run, run as fast as you can, you can't catch me I disagree, Oh man!

This entry has 1 comments: (Add your own)

#1 Comment from kaosnpanic2
2/10/06 10:43 AM | Permalink

Well being single and having no children , I know I've been looked apon by some as an irresponsible man . However , my response to this is : "Hey ! It's not that I'm irresponsible , It's just that I lack responsibilities." " Jelous ?"
Love reading your writings Raven ! Have a great day and don't forget to have atleast a little fun and laughs EVERY DAY !
Miles
aka KaosNpanic

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