Archives
Somebody Save Me (continues)
Taking public transportation to school was always an adventure. The bus screeched to a halt and Kathleen climbed aboard in a cloud of exhaust fumes, flashing her student bus pass to the scowling driver. The drivers always seemed less friendly on the first day of school. Perhaps it was all the additional stops he had to make, picking up the flood of noisy grammar and high school kids.
The Catholic grammar school didn't provide busing to out of town kids and the Catholic high school didn't provide busing at all. If your parents worked, or couldn't be bothered driving the long distance to the school (as was the case with Kathleen's mother), you took the "T". Mass Transit, in this instance, consisted of a 20 minute bus ride from her home town to the dingy depot in Arlington Heights and a transfer to the Harvard Square bus, jumping off at the stop in Arlington Center. A short walk across 4 lanes of traffic and down one city block and there you were; Arlington Catholic High School.
Last year she had hoped off the bus two stops earlier to attend her Catholic grammar school. This was to be her freshman year. New school, maybe new friends...she should be excited and nervous, right? Kathleen sighed as she glanced around the orange plastic seats skimming over the adult commuters with noses buried in travel cups of coffee or the morning paper, and her eyes settled on an empty seat near the center of the bus. The back of the bus was filled with a familar looking rowdy group of young kids. Former classmates, mostly, with a couple years to go before they joined her in high school.
Two girls from her class waved at her to come sit with them. One was wearing the same shiny new teal polyester uniform Kathleen was now sporting and the other wearing a Navy wool vest and green pleated plaid skirt of the rival Catholic high school the next town (and 4 bus stops) beyond her new school.
So...Mindy is going to Matignon and Kelly is going to A.C.H.S. Interesting. Wonder what those two will do without each other.
Kathleen waved dismissively at her "friends" and eyed the empty seat again. She kept walking resignedly and instead took an empty seat across the isle from Mindy and Kelly. These two best friends were always joined at the hip. It was a little startling to see them obviously headed for different schools.
"Oh my God, Kathleen! You're going to A.C. too? I'm so glad I am going to know someone there! How was your summer? I spent a week in Italy with my Grandmother. They have the most adorable guys in Italy..." Kelly spoke almost at a sound level only perceptible by dogs and at a speed that put an Uzi sub-machine gun to shame.
Mindy spoke over Kelly. "Oh my God! I don't know what I'm going to do without you guys. I am the only one going to Matignon from our school. I'm not going to know anybody! Kelly, I'm still mad at you for not talking your Grandma into taking me to Italy too! I was soooo bored the week you were away..."
As the two girls turned away from her to resume their rapid-fire conversation, Kathleen removed her head phones and raised her voice. "KELLY! Why aren't you going to Matignon with Mindy?"
Amazingly, the two girls went silent and looked at Kathleen. They glanced at each other and Kelly said, "I didn't pass the entrance exam for Matignon. Mindy did. It's a better school and she will have a better chance of getting into Vassar if she goes there."
Vassar? Kathleen blinked and said, "Oh."
The girls turned away again and resumed talking. Kathleen replaced her headphones and stared at her ugly teal shrouded lap. Her uniform skirt was knee length and smooth, except for one kick pleat in the front. What ever possessed A.C. to change their uniform to this truly hideous new ensemble was beyond her. The "old" uniform chose that moment to board the bus in the form of a Junior she didn't really know. It was a pretty maroon and gray pleated plaid skirt with tiny yellow pin strips and a nice gray wool vest. "Junior" girl made her way to the back of the bus but left a couple rows of seats separating her from the rest of the kids.
She looked at Kathleen and inquired, "Is that the new uniform?"
Kathleen nodded.
"Wow. It's really ugly."
That was the extent of their conversation.
The bus rolled to a stop in front of the McDonalds and one more person stepped up into the bus. Kathleen eyed this girl with interest. She was also sporting the ugly teal uniform. Another freshman? She didn't look familiar. "New girl" eyed the back of the bus and quickly planted herself in the empty seat in the middle that Kathleen had almost sat in earlier.
As the bus made its way through the center of Lexington, Kathleen found herself studying the back of "new girl's" head.
Why did she sit up there and not back here with the rest of us?
New girl pulled a notebook out of her backpack and began writing at a furious pace. When the bus pulled up to the bus station in Arlington Heights, New Girl didn't stop writing. Kathleen sat watching her as the rest of the bus passengers got off. The bus driver stepped off the bus and into the small snack bar inside the depot. As the bus sat idling, Kathleen saw one of the Harvard Square buses pull into the lot. If they wanted to be on-time for school, she and new girl really needed to catch that bus. She made her way up the isle and paused next to new girl's seat.
"We'd better catch the next bus now or we'll be late," she said as she tapped new girl on the shoulder. New girl jumped in fright and snapped out of the writing trance she seemed to be in. She looked around at the empty seats and finally saw the second bus boarding.
She nodded yes at Kathleen and they both quickly hopped off the empty bus and onto the nearly full new bus. New girl took the last empty seat at the front of the bus and Kathleen hesitated for a moment and then sat next to her.
ryanagi at 12:06:00 PM EDT Blog about this entry |
Add to del.icio.us | 
digg this
-
I love this story. It brings back memories:
I went to Dom Savio in East Boston. The trip to and from Revere required a Blue Line jaunt, and a bus. There's no thrill on earth better than standing on the platform at a urine-smelling Beachmont Station when it's 7AM and 10 degrees!
You're a good writer. Kudos! -
Humph. Danged picky alerts anyway. I'm not getting them on this J or on Patrick's What If J, dangit.
I like it. Andrea might have a point. Something to think about anyway. But whether or not you choose to try what she suggested, I agree with her that the details are great. You make it interesting enough that I want to know what happens next, and that's always a good thing.
Sammie :) -
Becky? Do you remember the J Entry you wrote about the first time you and your hubby met? Print that sucker out on paper. (Words on a page are easier to read than words on a computer screen. I want you to refer to this entry often. Well, if you choose to do this, anyway.) The way you wrote that entry was beautifully engaging and it made me feel as if I was RIGHT THERE. I remember feeling excited and nervous for you. And I was almost in tears at one point.
Did you know that writing in first person (like you did in the J entry I mention above) is the most difficult POV to do? It's because the *I* character has ALL the obligation of showing what's going on in a scene. But you've got that down-pat. You nail it. You're good at it.
Now this is only my opinion, which you are feel to take or not, but I feel that Kathleen's story would be easier for you to tell in a first person POV. The third person POV is keeping me too far away. You do wonderfully well with the details, but I can't help thinking that I'd be able to relate better to Kathleen if SHE'S telling the story. There's a lot going on in the scene you've shared here--seems as if there's water under the bridge--and it would probably be easier for you, as the writer, if you could address all of this in a first person voice. It'll force you to focus on Kathleen instead of the surroundings.
If you have any questions or concerns about what I've said, please e-mail me. If you're mad or hurt about what I've said, let me have it. It's okay. I understand.
Remember this is only my opinion. And I've never been published. And I'm not an editor. So I might not know what the frell I'm talking about at all! -
Holy cow! You've updated. I don't have time to read this now (I was just checking to see if there was anything more in here and zowie, there is).
Like the Governator, Ah'll be bahk.
8/24/06 4:30 PM
I notice you haven't posted in this journal for 2 years, but hope you still get an alert. I kept a log of the anniversary chat we had last Sunday (8/21/06), and notice that you attended. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. If you find this comment, could you forward your present blog URL to me, please?
Many thanks and best wishes,
Guido
http://journals.aol.co.uk/pha