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< 5/21 Home alone,
Monday, May 21, 2007
5/22 Insulated wi >
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
May 2007
5/28 Arkansas quarters & Keeping Preacher
5/26 Some system going & Are you English, German, or American?
5/25 Talking nuts & Loan
5/22 Insulated windows,  6 days @ sea,& Your suits've been here
5/23 You could have & Young minister's ooops
5/21 Home alone, A Fool & His Squeaky Wheel, & Problems at Heli-Pad 1
5/20 Little problems & You don't love me any more
5/19 They walk among us, & Backwoods Census
5/18 Yellow canaries, Yim Yonson, & 2nd Grade science lesson
5/17 Keeping a secret, PUN, & Friend is a lightbulb
4/15 Stamp, Wrong number, & Where was this listed?
5/14 Makin the bacon, Industrious mother, & Census taking
What Moms really want for Mother's Day & You know you're a mother when
5/12 Outside looking in, Bottle of wine for hubby, & Wishing well
5/11Peel off and win, Served bigger steak yesterday, & Window seats in plane
5/10 Wife lost, Willette B. Long, & Where there is a Will there is a
5/9 Why did you have to die, Why hair is white, & Wife's favorite flower
5/7 Speak correctly, Dog is better then a gal, & 3 year old with baby questions
5/6 Where's my Rolex, Who died, & New car
5/5 Astrologer and the King, How to open the hatch, & Don't turn your lights on
4/4 New dentist, Tired traveling businessman, & What state is Vermont is
5/3 Prove this chair doesn't exist, Pushy lady with attitude, & Trimester means
5/2 Stolen bags, Refrigerator visitor (oldie), & What's a
5/1I found another pun, Nabbed a shoplifter, & Weight or Wait
« May 2007 Archive
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
2:33:00 PM EDT

5/23 You could have & Young minister's ooops


A husband and wife are traveling by car from Key West to Boston. After almost twenty-four hours on the road, they're too tired to continue, and they decide to stop for a rest. They stop at a nice hotel and take a room, but they only plan to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road.  When they check out four hours later, the desk clerk hands them a bill for $350. The man explodes and demands to know why the charge is so high.  He tells the clerk although it's a nice hotel, the rooms certainly aren't worth $350. When the clerk tells him $350 is the standard rate, the man insists on speaking to the Manager.  The Manager appears, listens to the man, and then explains that the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center that were available for the husband and wife to use. "But we didn't use them," the man complains. "Well, they are here, and you could have," explains the Manager. He goes on to explain they could have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. "The best entertainers from New York, Hollywood and Las Vegas perform here," the Manager says.  "But we didn't go to any of those shows," complains the man again. "Well, we have them, and you could have, " the Manager replies. No matter what facility the Manager mentions, the man replies, "But we didn't use it!"  The Manager is unmoved, and eventually the man gives up and agrees to pay. He writes a check and gives it to the Manager. The Manager is surprised when he looks at the check.  "But sir," he says, "this check is only made out for $100." "That's right," says the man. "I charged you $250 for sleeping with my wife."  "But I didn't!" exclaims the Manager. "Well," the man replies, "she was here, and you could have."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A nervous young minister, new to the church, told the flock, "For my text today, I will take the words, 'And they fed five men with five thousand loaves of bread and two thousand fishes.'" A member of the flock raised his hand and said, "That's not much of a trick. I could do that." The minister didn't respond. However, the next Sunday he decided to repeat the text. This time he did it properly, "And they fed five thousand men with five loaves of bread and two fishes." Smiling, the minister said to the noisy man, "Could you do that, Mr. Perkins?" The member of the flock said, "I sure could." "How would you do it?" "With all the food I had left over from last Sunday!"


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