Politics, Culture, and Other Wastes of Time

In a mere ten hours or so in the ACC Men's Basketball Tournament in Charlotte, NC, the top-ranked University of North Carolina Tarheels will face the Virginia Tech Hokies.

While I am rooting for the Hokies, especially since it's the alma mater of my sister Lale Lovell not too mention my friends Bahadir Acuner and Leigh-Anne Keatts (well, actually she's still taking classes there!), reality does set in.

As it is my friend Greensboro, NC, folk singer Bruce Piephoff , a huge UNC fan, will be delighted to see the Tarheels triumph_ I just hope this time it not by 87 points (as it more or less was when the two teams played in Chapel Hill).

Here are ten more things that are more likely to happen than a Hokies win on Saturday:

10. Peace between the Sunnis, Kurds and Shi'aa in Iraq

9. George W. Bush's admission that waterboarding is torture, and that he is a blithering idiot, on the same day!

8. John McCain naming fellow Vietnam War veteran John Kerry as his running mate with the full support of everyone at Fox News.

7. Chelsea Clinton's endorsement of Barack Obama

6. Sen. Larry Craig (R-Idaho) coming out of the closet, once and for all....................... ...............................in Provo, Utah.

5. Jennifer Love-Hewitt agreeing to go out with me (I guess her fiance would not be pleased!)........See Photo

4. Dick Cheney winning a blue ribbon for duck shooting at a county fair in Casper, Wyoming.

3. Someone calling "Afghanistan's Most Wanted" with a tip on the whereabouts of Osama bin Laden.

2. Turkey getting accepted into the European Union (But, we don't hold it against Tintin.)

1. A Chuck Norris Boflex demonstration at the Democratic National Convention in Denver.............

If anyone knows of a writing vacany on David Letterman, by all means please let me know.

Of course, if I did live in Blacksburg, Va., I would probably take in a movie at the Lyric Theatre instead of watching the game.

And, conversely, if I lived in Chapel Hill, NC, I would probably be at the Varsity Theatre_ unless they were showing that Dr. Seuss movie too!

Useful Links:

http://www.brucepiephoff.com

http://www.thelyric.net

Incidentally, The Lyric is now showing the great French animated film "Persepolis" about a young woman coming of age in Iran, whichis definitely a red state!

UPDATE (3/16/08): And, Tech ALMOST won the game! A last-second jumper by UNC's star player Tyler Hansbrough gave the Tarheels a 68-66 win.

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