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Friday, April 7, 2006
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Friday, April 7, 2006
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STuBY | 4.28.06
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Employee of the Week | Gas Bags
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STuBY | 4.7.06
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Abstract Rice
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« April 2006 Archive
Friday, April 7, 2006

STuBY | 4.7.06



The Award Goes To: Ryan Seacrest


(Getty Images)

Good Lord it's been a rough week for the editors here: a brush with the ebola virus, moving offices from Tucson to Upperville, Virginia and a painful wisdom tooth extraction. But as much as our week sucked, there were others riding shotgun in the suck truck as well:

You've been a busy Seacrest these past few months, hosting your face off in nearly every capacity on nearly every media outlet. The Seacrest Empire had nearly everything, spare a queen. Then you did it. You found one. Not any C or D-lister or teen groupie, but a Desperate Housewife! Kablamo! You and Teri! Stars aligned! She needed someone to help her get through a rough patch and you needed to quash those rumors to finally assume the throne as media king. But wait. This kiss looked pretty awkward, like you were trying to suck a stray hunk of In-N-Out Burger off Teri's face. People QUESTIONED. You deflected. And Teri did her part. When asked if she was attached to Seacrest, she added, "I'm not." NOT. PART. OF. THE. PLAN. Thankfully you had your friend Simon to help. His reassuring words? "Lose the beard." Classy! Awesome! Wait, not awesome! That sucked! Plus, you work with a STuBY winner. Seacrest, er, out!

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(WireImage.com)

Let's get this out of the way: Meredith Vieira does not suck. Not even close. So why does it suck to be her? Because she has to fill in some huge, stylish shoes after Katie Couric's departure from the 'Today Show.' The battle of the morning shows is pretty intense these days, with 'Good Morning America' showing signs of relieving 'Today' of its #1 status. Let's say that happens. Where will the cross-hairs be focused? Squarely on Ms. Vieira. And, there's that whole hosting a Regis show thing Still, there is reason for hope: Ms. Vieira won NewsFight! Slap that on Matt Lauer's forehead!

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(WireImage.com)

Women of Size on 'Idol':
First, Frenchie Davis is given the boot in season Two (okay, so she might have posted some naughty photos somewhere). Then, Jennifer Hudson is kicked to the curb in season Three (okay, she could be a little intense). Now, powerhouse diva Mandisa is sent packing. Some have their theories about why she might be gone. But doesn't it seem odd that America turns down the volume on these talented ladies while they had no problem allowing Ruben Studdard to sweat his way to an 'Idol' crown?

STuBY Runners-Up: Eminem, this typo, this Goth, this hugger

Sign Up! Did this column makeyou laugh? Cry? Dry heave? If so, click HERE if you want to subscribe for weekly Sucks updates.


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Previous STuBY Winners

-Sharon Stone
- Paula Abdul
- St. Patty's Day Smorgasboard
- Ayla Brown
- Lachey/Alba
- Dunkleman
- Scott Stapp #2
- Sean P.Federline
- TheManning Brothers
- James Frey/Oprah
- Osama bin Laden
- Jennifer Aniston
- Nicole Richie
- Sucks Year End
- Suckiest Year Nominees
- FM radio/FCC
- Debbie Lafave
- Jessica Simpson
- Holiday Travelers Edition

- Donovan McNabb -- History Making Launch of STuBY


thefeedblog at 10:29:00 AM EDT Blog about this entry
This entry has 36 comments: (Add your own)
  • #36 Comment from hilaire720 
    6/11/06 8:40 PM Permalink
    bodeeworks.....saying Ryan is hott is like saying Micheal Jackson didn't have plastic surgery. Everyone dwells over him and thinks he's so hott I say he's not worth the attention.
  • #35 Comment from seawitch8603693 
    5/30/06 6:45 AM Permalink
    LOL this is fun!
    When I you going to cover my Leotard clad 'MP' George Galloway? I live on his patch. yukk!
  • #34 Comment from daisysrfun 
    5/20/06 9:08 PM Permalink
    the last time I ran into Ryan Seacrest he was about to go home with a porn star after finishing his third martini rocks at the four seasons at three in the am.  He is a rock star but no one knows it.  He is tons of fun and dumped Teri Hatcher on her ass, why does he need her?
  • #33 Comment from c3jy 
    4/21/06 8:15 PM Permalink
    I thoroughly DISLIKE Ryan Secrest!  He can't make a show w/o being tacky to Simon.  I know Simon can be tempermental. but really, Ryan just cannot resist throwing the barbs at him. I think Ryan Secreat is in need of charm lessons.
  • #32 Comment from thebigu708 
    4/21/06 4:23 PM Permalink
    I think Ryan is great and does a great job.  Everyone should just leave him alone. Maybe everyone is jealous of his good looks and fame.
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