xirus|monte Journal

this was a dumb ass statement that was made to me during a point in my past weekend. (to the statement, i should have said i was in a motorcycle training class because i knew what i was doing but i was bored and wanted to waste an entire weekend playing in a parking lot on an old motorcycle.)

i had motorcycle instruction and safety classes this past weekend and they were a disaster. listed below are the reasons for this assessment.

1. the instructors would not know how to teach a class even if someone were to shove a lesson plan up their asses. they started to get short with us when they felt we were not catching on to an exercise as fast as they wanted. they were literally yelling at a person if they were to fall behind and not keep up with everyone else.

2. the class was rushed. we were shown an exercise and told to execute it after watching one of the instructors do it once. it was HOT as HADES and we were told to wear sturdy long sleeved shirts, jeans, boots, goggles and gloves. from wearing a helmet that had my head sweating as if i was in a turkish sauna, feeling sticky from sweating through my pants and shirt and being made to jump right back onto that piece of crap without as much as a 10 minute break, needless to say it had me in a really SHITTY mood. i started feeling light headed and i am not the nicest of people when i am not feeling good.

3. the class was too crowded. there was 12 of us in a parking lot about the size of a playground. well, a little bigger, but not by much. while "trying" to do an exercise, the area to perform the maneuver was so cramped that it really was no time to mentally take note of what was happening. the instructor kept yelling for me to speed up. i told him, "i am inside the guy in front of me ass. i did not know i was coming to give an enema today". i take it he did not like that statement and i really did not care. i was in KISS MY ASS mode by this time.

4. the bikes were from the 70s or 80s or some other decade where safety was not a priority.  there were no side mirrors or a tachometer. the throttle was idled up so high on the bike i was riding that i thought i was going to jet off any minute into the field that was next to the parking lot. they had us sign waivers to release them from any responsibility. B.S. on that! if i would have been hurt i would have raised Johnny Cochran from the grave to plead my case.

5. the bike i was practicing on was very uncomfortable. i get most of my height from my legs and i told the instructor that i had my knees near my cheeks. any other time i think that would probably be a nice position. LOL! the motorcycle was in no way near the type that is in use on today's streets. i complained of this and was told that i would just need to ride it for the day. (they did not know who they were talking to.) i eventually was changed to a different bike. it was an even bigger piece of shit than the last bike.

6. the class did not give real world riding situations. there was no instructions on what to do in different traffic situations or how to handle an accident. it would have been fine if i was only planning to ride my bike around in circles in a parking lot. surely, this would not be the case. this is going to be my main mode of transportation to and from work.

7. the straw that broke the camel's back, is when we were told that the last day of instruction would be moved to June 15th if Sunday happened to be rained out. this most definitely was the case. who in the world wants to wait 5 weeks in between class days? does this make sense to anyone? i know it did not to me.

now that i have given the points of horror, this is how the ordeal ended for me. with me being so SHITTY, the instructor pulled me to the side and told me that he feels that it would be better for me to seek one on one instruction because i cannot concentrate in a crowded learning environment. i asked him if i was supposed to turn my ADHD off just because i was in a disorganized class. i was informed that i did not need to come back on Sunday which would have been the last day of the class if it had not rained. i asked him if i would be reimbursed for the class time that i will not be there. he told me NO. i will not be reimbursed and that i lost the rest of that money. mind you, the cost of this class was $150. i kept calm. i kept my composure because i was not trying to go to jail for beating the hell out of a kentucky undereducated asshole. i politely thanked him for his time and shook his hand. now lets fast forward to today. i called to speak to the owner of the motorcycle school. i was told he was not in the office at that moment and would be back shortly. i professionally gave the information to his assistant and i informed her that i "required" a callback. this was at 11 am. the time was going on 1 pm and still no callback. i am not the most patient person in situations such as this. so you know i had to make another call. i was informed the matter is being researched. i said thank you and hung up. i immediately put this on my TO DO LIST. so you know i will be driving up to the school if i start to get the runaround. it is nothing like a man of color when he has his boxers up his ass. it is not a pretty sight. i will do a follow up blog on the results of all of this nonsense. the main reason for this blog is i needed to put my thoughts down in print while they were fresh in my mind. i would hate to take them to small claims court to get ALL of my funds back. it really is not about the money. it is the principle of paying for instruction, not getting it and being told, "sorry for your luck!" well wish me luck.