don't go quietly

I've been exhausted lately. Reminded me strongly of the feeling I'd get when I've been swimming all day in the sun.  Then it's dinner time and my parents called me over to the B B Q in progress.  I'd walk over to the picnic table in my bathing suit, still wet with this wicked sunburn on my face.  Completely exhausted but so anxious to go back out there with my friends.

That is how I feel everyday.  Even when I wake up pretty much.

I get annoyed that I have to stop and sleep.  Sleep always gets in the way of absolutely everything.  But then again, it's really nice to have sometimes because you're all warm and stuff and have sweet dreams.  Well, sometimes.

I had a dream the other night about a friend.  I've been having bad feelings about them lately so it's not all that surprising.  My dream was that they lived in this tiny castle and they were very mad and screaming angry things and I didn't know why.  They set fire to everything and I think hit me once across the face.  I KNOW!   It dawned on me afterwards that I don't have anything to really apologize for, yet I kept thinking I did.  Also, that I have the most intense dreams.  lol.  While it can be disturbing when it comes to burninating-friend-madness, there is also random-dream-hug-happiness sometimes which isn't so bad.  Odd, but my dreams are like that so much lately that I have developed a theory.  When it's good, it's good.  You don't really ask why.  And when it's bad, you wake up.  Then you're awake and it doesn't really matter why.  lol.  I forget how it ended.....isn't that so anti-climactic?

Have you ever had those days. When you feel like you have just completed so much and than you look back and in reality you basicly have done nothing and than you look at the clock and its still 4:30. I have these days a lot where they seem never ending...i think its god telling me "get a life"

Michelle still hasnt recieved any information on Abelien University in Texas. She said if she doesnt get accepted there she is just going to brookedale. In a way i want her to go to texas because i know thats what she wants but I also dont want her to leave because I know ill miss her a lot. I want her to be happy even if that means i have to suffer through pure bordem untill i graduate this thing they call high school. Which by the way I only have three years left because technically this year is done. we only have about 5 weeks.

Plans for the summer would be the usual. Im thinking of working a week at camp with abby...we will be like couselors or something. Maybe work Rebeccas week or better yet JOSH'S. No way would i spend one week exclusivly for Josh. Him and his asshole friends for one week? No way. Im hoping to fly down to florida with Michelle and see lisa and everyone. They are moving next week. Laura is going down there for a week, or maybe its two weeks. While Michelle is on her cruise I think im going to Florida anyway with the fam. That should be interesting...

Diane Court: Are you shaking?
Lloyd Dobler: No.
Diane Court: You're shaking.
Lloyd Dobler: I don't think so.
Diane Court: You're cold.
Lloyd Dobler: I don't think I am.
Diane Court: Then why are you shaking?
Lloyd Dobler: I don't know. I think I'm happy.

[ say anything ]

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